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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think that parents of pre-schoolers should know

22 replies

activate · 17/07/2011 22:01

that children of the following age are still children

17
16
15
14
13
12

yes they are huge in comparison to your little ones - they look like adults but they are children - they are not going to hurt you - the are probably more frightened of you than you are of them - please don't treat them like the enemy.

11
10
9
8

idyllic years - pre-teenage angst, post childish tantrums - make the most of them. Some 11 year olds can look like 16 year olds by the way.

7
6
5

big compared to your 2 year old - but oh so little in the world - they have little impulse control

I am sure I felt that the big hulking brutes should know better when DS1 and 2 were under 5 - but by the time DS3 and DD came along I realised I was wrong - so, so wrong

I am making attempts to have the longest post in the world by the way Grin

OP posts:
ninah · 17/07/2011 22:03

idyllic? someone should tell ds

TeamEdward · 17/07/2011 22:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

onepieceofcremeegg · 17/07/2011 22:03

Some of the big children (14 ish) are really lovely to the little ones at the local park. They all share some of the same equipment, some of it is multi-age like zip wire. They lift the little ones on and give them extra turns. More than once I have intervened to tell the teenagers they can have a go as well. :)

My "baby" is now 7 but she is still little.

AgentZigzag · 17/07/2011 22:04

Can I be there when you tell a 17 YO that they're still a child? Grin

activate · 17/07/2011 22:04

I tell my 17 year old all the time that he'll always be my baby

he was the model for this face [roll]

OP posts:
MedusaIsHavingABadHairDay · 17/07/2011 22:05

applauds Grin
And even 18 and 19 year olds are still children.. standing on the scary edge of adult expectations, even if they can vote and drive...

GypsyMoth · 17/07/2011 22:05

theres some truth in there Activate....especially the teens bit!

activate · 17/07/2011 22:06

this face Hmm

OP posts:
Tchootnika · 17/07/2011 22:07

What a strange post, OP.
What's the story behind it?
(And I must admit, I struggle to think of 17yo.s as 'children'. Big kids, sometimes, sure, but much as I cringe at the term 'young people', I kind of find it more appropriate.)
What's the story, though?

Claw3 · 17/07/2011 22:10

I have a 17 year old, its hard to think of him as a child, he shaves!

GypsyMoth · 17/07/2011 22:25

my 17 year old has just done a full days work on the till at the NEXT sale! she's no child,but she did have to have a lift in as she cant drive!

Greythorne · 17/07/2011 22:27

Medusa
I wasn't a child at 18.
I had passed my driving test, got a job, moved to a foreign country, had my own bank account, no longer relied on parents financially. I did not feel like a child then nor do I now believe I was a child.

SheCutOffTheirTails · 17/07/2011 22:28

Bollocks! Teenagers are not children, they are adolescents.

And FFS 18 and 19 year olds are adults. Young adults, but still fully grown people.

I agree that they are not scary, and not the enemy. I think teenagers are ace.

But they are not children, and I won't treat them as though they are.

somersetmum · 17/07/2011 22:30

Totally agree - and they should also know that their pre-schoolers will be big hulking brutes in the blink of an eye - oops, sorry about the cliche - been watching too much Apprentice with my gorgeous, strapping, (but very much still a child) teenage ds :)

Mollymax · 17/07/2011 22:31

I totally understand what you mean.
I stopped going to our local toddler group when a PFB mum shouted at my 3 year old dd for "strangling" her child.
She was only giving him a hug.

BelleDameSansMerci · 17/07/2011 22:33

What makes you think we don't know that?

SheCutOffTheirTails · 17/07/2011 22:35

But at a certain point 3 year olds do get beyond toddler groups, since they are not toddlers (any more than teenagers are children).

worraliberty · 17/07/2011 22:35

Bit strange to think of a child legally getting married and having children of their own though!

Oh and I don't think I know any 17yr olds who are scared of me...though I live in hope of meeting one Grin

TheSecondComing · 17/07/2011 23:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

startail · 17/07/2011 23:44

The op is quite right. However, grown up they look young people still sometimes need a bit of slack, a bit of understanding, whether they are 10 and 13 like my DC or 18 year old students. They will be doing things for the first time and sometimes the world will look a big and frightening place.

MsPlaced · 18/07/2011 00:15

your 17 year old might be your baby, but he's not really a child. Doesn't mean I don't agree with the essence of your sentiments though.

SheCutOffTheirTails · 18/07/2011 00:25

Of course young people need a bit of understanding and patience and a lot of slack.

But that doesn't make them children.

TheSecond I don't think the general corpus of toddler group parents is averse to 3 year olds showing up. I just find it a total pita bringing one.

A child who gets mortally offended if another child snatches something off them, and thinks she has suffered a grievous insult if another child doesn't wait their turn, should not be around 2 year olds.

God gave us nursery school so that 3 year olds can be rigid little buggers together where nobody else has to suffer them.

(I love her really :) )

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