To think that my BIL should really take the hint now & leave?

[clingingtosanity]

Despite being horrendously busy this weekend, DH agreed with his bro for him to 'pop in' for a quick lunch today so the DC could all play together.

He reminded him earlier how busy we are with lots of jobs still to be done before DS's birthday party in 2 weeks & also told him that I've not been feeling too well (not a lie).

They arrived at midday, we finished lunch about 1.5hrs ago and they're STILL HERE.

I've tried rubbing my head & eyes, complaining of a headache, asking for water as I 'feel a bit funny' & casually reminding DH that we were going to try & get to the shops before they close but no dice.

Btw, it's not just me who wants them gone, DH cornered me in the kitchen saying 'Why are they still here?!' to me.

AIBU to think he should take the numerous hints?!

you obviously arent interacting with them as you are on here documenting their every phrase, so why not just pop to shop on your own

lol, does sound irritating. you just put your shoes and coats on and then stand up saying right, we've got to go, we must do this again. some people need blunt. i may be one of those people i dont get offended when i get hoofed out, but i know i miss hints so i just say 'tell when to go' :)

He doesn't live locally so wouldn't stay here while we went out. Also, I'm forever being accused of being 'stroppy' by DH's family because I dare to voice an opposing opinion so I can just imagine how well pushing them out would go down.

Trouble is, I'm starting to get cross with DH now as I think he needs to be more proactive in making it clear it's time to go & wondering what arrangements he made. Don't want to argue with him but I'm full of PMT/possible pg hormones.

Agree with Lenak..

What Olivetti said.

Totally agree Olivetti. It also feels incredibly freeing! As does declining invitations to do things 'because I don't fancy it'. Said in the right way there's no hard feelings and everyone knows where they stand!

I like Lenak's idea too.

I'd rather be thought of as stroppy than endure hours and hours of people just not leaving and getting on my wick . Feel the fear.....

This thread's all wrong especially as you have a profile on your page

It's really not nice to invite someone to lunch and then slag them off on the internet simply because you and your DH don't have the bollocks to simply say "I'm sorry, we have to go out now. Thanks for coming to lunch, we'll have to do it again sometime when we're less busy"

Sorry, not nice at all and I'm sure they'd be mortified if they knew.

My suggestion was quite serious. I used it to turf out MIL when she had been sat down so long she was taking root and I couldn't stand another minute of it (and neither could DW, so not just me) - and it got her out.

Well you are coming over as completely stroppy. I bet you are huffing around the place and making loads of passive aggressive comments.

Follow Lenak's suggestion, or just say 'I'm sorry but we're getting ready to go out now, thanks for coming, see you another day', and hand them their coats!

You know you are allowed to ask people to leave, don't you?

People are far too polite

"Well, it's been lovely, but we're going to have to say goodbye now, we have to go out. I'll just get your coats."

Hand them their coats. Remain standing. Walk towards door.

Actually brownleatherbrogues I was having a well deserved few minutes peace & quiet to myself after cooking lunch, clearing up from lunch, chatting lots about a possible camping trip together & playing shops/cars/teddies with them all. That's all.

I may be wrong worraliberty but I don't believe I can actually be identified from my profile.

What no-one would recognise your child?

This is just the ultimate in talking behind someone's back. It's just not on Imo.

Why on earth didn't one of you just go to the shops ? Do you need support to scour the aisles of Sainsburys ?

You don't sound very friendly tbh and a bit rude.

Really not hard- lenak speaks sense.

I don't understand all the passive agressive "I've a headache" nonsense - why bother?! He is probably just winding you up waiting for you to ask him to leave like a reasonable adult . No wonder his family find you hard work.

Plus what worra says - presumably that picture is of someone you know?!

He won't know anyone on here & I don't believe he owns photo recognition software.

"Right its been really lovely to see you and now I am going to be really rude and say we need to get a wiggle on". If the tables were reversed am sure you would have been hoofed out long ago.
Dont do the huffy puffy thing though huffy puffiness gets ignored by most adults.

You could have been away an hour ago if you had said to DH and BIL what needed doing today. It's not rude to say to guests that you have plans and you'll meet up for a more leisurely afternoon some other time.

Just checked the time most shops are shut now[hgrin]

Maybe I am being a bit stroppy on here but I wasn't unfriendly and rude to them and would never be.

Yes, I suppose it is like talking about someone behind their back, which isn't at all nice, you're right & with hindsight I shouldn't be doing that and I'm sorry.

I have to say though, some of you are judging me very quickly, which also isn't a great character trait IMHO.

You could have been away an hour ago if you had said to DH and BIL what needed doing today. It's not rude to say to guests that you have plans and you'll meet up for a more leisurely afternoon some other time.

Also, I genuinely did have a headache

Also, thequeenofdenial I never said they find me hard work, you made that bit up yourself. I said they don't like it when I don't agree with their opinions, which, correct me if I'm wrong, I don't have to do.