To have 'let myself go'?

[mistressploppy]

I've just realised that I make hardly any effort with my appearance these days. It started off as 'oh I've had a baby' but he's 20mo now and it's just pure laziness I reckon.

I shove my hair in a pony tail and put mascara on but that's it. My clothes are totally blah. I'm too fat (probably 3st too fat, but I'm nearly 6ft so 'wear it well')

Been married 3yrs. When I was single and on the pull I looked great

SHOULD I see it as a duty to look better? It's not making me unhappy but I know I'd like to be better turned out, I just don't seem to want it enough to actually bother.

At some point you will bother (barring depression)

It's just another stage.

If you don't want to, then don't. I sure don't.

Clean. Covered. Comfortable.

That's my fashion statement.

And sometimes Clean gets left off.

I was never there in the first place

If you're happy and your DH isn't bothered, where's the damage?

Liz Jones will hate you for it, but that's only a good thing.

Hmm...

Have you really let yourself go, or, as you imply in your message, have you simply stopped dressing "sexily" (because the aim of that particular attire was fulfilled!), and now are simply groomed and presentable? Our culture currently privileges (very young) women who dress provocatively, and falling short of that can seem to mean "letting yourself go". But you may still be dressing neatly and nicely enough.

Don't buy into the soft-porn version of what women should look like.

If you are clean, groomed, presentable, then you're ok, I think.

Sounds like it does bother you, else you wouldn't have mentioned it? YANBU it's difficult getting ready etc with a baby.

If you really do think you're 3st overweight there's plenty of exercise like walking which you can do with a pram / baby.

Am sure your DH loves you just as you are but no harm in dressing up once in a while and remembering the way you both were pre bebe? Keep the spark alive and all that...

ime once you start losing weight and it starts to notice, you will start to get your mojo back :) I am just getting to that stage now where i have lost a bit (lots to go) and am starting to take notice again

My DD is 9 and I've only just got round to losing the weight I put on when I had her . If you do need to change something you need to do it when you are ready and it feels right for you. Bringing up kids is hard enough without the added pressure of feeling you have to look like a supermodel every day.

I had a few years where I felt too busy and too tired to care much about my appearance, though I never looked awful. It is nice though, as I have done recently, to reconnect a bit with your old self and be trimmer and wear nice clothes again, I've also started doing my nails. My aim isn't to look the same as pre-babies, though, or even look much younger, just look nice for the age I am now. If it doesn't bother you, then there is no obligation, but as Angel says, it obviously does bother you a bit otherwise you wouldn't have posted about it.