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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to take DS out and about when he's off school because of sickness?

91 replies

cornflakegirl · 08/07/2011 09:06

DS1 (6) was not well after school on Wednesday - he was complaining of tummy ache, was quite hot, and fell asleep on the sofa for an hour. He threw up in the middle of the night. School have the standard 48 hours after D or V policy, so he's off school.

However, by yesterday morning he was fine. No more vomiting, eating fairly normally, although he didn't do anything too strenuous. Today, he's still not allowed into school - would it be unreasonable to take him to soft play or something so that he's not just stuck in the house?

OP posts:
27tilly · 08/07/2011 10:44

How would you feel if you was out and a child was off because of D&V but seemed fine in themselves but yet your child caught it? Would it be Ok for them to do it? Or just for you?

HoneyNorwegianRidgebackdragon · 08/07/2011 10:50

Cornflake girl. Ds is just turned 8. About 3 weeks ago he had a virus with a high temp. He vomited once,probably as a reaction to temp. school has 48 hour policy. He felt ok the next day but he was off. DD is one, as far as I was concerned it was day as normal for dd, she couldn't go to her sessions as ds was ill.

I focused on keeping dd entertained and ds had to entertain himself. Six is old enough to do that. If you have to play a game do it at nap time if your younger child has one.

You ds does not need to be rewarded with a trip out. You can waste a day doing nothing. it won't harm any of you.

also your younger child may be infectious too.

ZZZenAgain · 08/07/2011 10:58

no-one will admit to it now!

A woman I really liked told me at a toddler group that her ds had fever that day but she said he was fine. She was bored brainless at home I think and just wanted to get out and chat. I thought about it loudly but I said nothing, as you do... It happens a fair bit. I remember when dd was doing ballet and so on aged about 4-6, dp often sent their girls to ballet although they were officially sick, possibly because it was paid for? I've had parents say to me X threw up 3 x in the night but he's fine so he is brought along to art class or on a prepaid workshop or whatever it is to sit next to your dc. I always wonder what they expect me to say to that

I remember too being at a toddler group and a woman saying she had brought her elder son along because he had chickenpox so that a lot of the toddlers would catch it. She was doing us an especial favour as I recall because the younger they are when they get it, the less they struggle with it or some such thing.

Hufflepuzzpig · 08/07/2011 10:59

YABU. Very.

Really hate this kind of selfishness. It sucks being stuck in (DD is going utterly mental as she's been indoors for a couple of weeks with a seemingly everlasting case of chicken pox) but you just have to do it. I was Shock to find out my friend took her DD to Peppa Pig World 3 days after she got CP.

Your DS might be fine, and that's great. And of course it could just be something he ate. But what if it isn't? What if it were a mild case of norovirus or something, and someone else caught it and suffered very badly? What if they were a tiny baby, or elderly, or pregnant?

It's unlikely, sure - but it is just one day. Why risk it? And I sympathise about balancing the needs of both DCs but that's just part of having more than one child surely?

ZZZenAgain · 08/07/2011 11:05

not to mention shingles after having had chickenpox...

That's bad, painful, drags on. Dd had it last summer. Many thanks to whoever infected her with it..

IronOrchid · 08/07/2011 11:07

YABU. Was this week stuck in a queue behind obviously sick child coughing to the point of yarking over other customers. Mother oblivious to kid and his infectiousness, clearly didn't give a shit. Thanks love - sure everyone in the queue will appreciate the missed work/spoiled holidays/general germiness.

And no, this wasn't a queue in a chemist. Was Matalan, so I'm sure she could have put off the shopping trip for a day or two.

So yes, YABU.

PaperView · 08/07/2011 11:13

What is yarking?

IronOrchid · 08/07/2011 11:17

Spewing. I suppose I should say boaking, but I'm more of a yarker myself.

valiumredhead · 08/07/2011 15:26

I am fairly confident that DS isn't contagious. He threw up once and had no diarrhoea. It wasn't a virulent sickness bug

What your ds has been able to shake off pretty quickly could lay someone else low for much much longer! 3 years ago my ds was off school with the most horrendous sickness bug and ended up off of school for over 2 weeks. All because people were doing what you do - they think because their child has just thrown up once, then everyone else will have it mildly too. As a family we never just get a 24 hr bug it's always at least a week - drives me bonkers when people ignore the 48 rule!!

Rant over!

sweetness86 · 08/07/2011 15:36

valiumredhead I agree with you on that my friends son is one of those kids who get sick once in the night and she sends him to school the next day 'well hes only been sick once' she says. My sons get it and they have it at least 3/4 days and get it worse than my friends son but I keep them off school obviously and dont take them out .
She took her son to his football match and to school possibly infecting everyone and just coz she didnt wanna have the time off work !

valiumredhead · 08/07/2011 15:43

sweetness I have actually become a bit germ phobic because we get it so badly every time - if anyone says they have been ill, I will cross the road rather than get within a 20 metre radius of them! Grin

Blu · 08/07/2011 15:45

YABVU to take him to soft play.
he may well still be infectious (hence school ban) and it's a terrible example to set to him - that off ill from school means going to soft play.

Blu · 08/07/2011 15:49

The fact that he was hot ans sleepy suggests that it was a virus rather than something he had eaten, and therefore infectious.

Also - how hard can it be to entertain the younger child for 2 days? PLenty of activities other than board games.

valiumredhead · 08/07/2011 15:49

Also he is likely to pick something else up as his immune system will be low after the bug.

thisisyesterday · 08/07/2011 16:07

yabu

if he's ill he's ill. it woul dbe wise to allow him to recover properly instead of sending him somewhere to run around and get hot

why does he need to go out anyway? what's wrong with just playing at home?

when i were a lass we didn't do all this gallivanting around to stop us being "stuck in the house"... and we all survived

sweetness86 · 08/07/2011 21:46

valiumredhead me too I actually treat them like they have the plague Smile

I popped in my moms once when she was ill and I literally only walked in the hall I was obsessive I was going to catch it I washed my hands constantly and wrapped my scarf around my face as not to breath in the particles Grin I hate bugs but they seem to put us all out of action for at least a week I refuse to take chances Smile

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