AIBU to think "my compensation my money i'll spend it how I choose"

[HidinginaHardHat]

I'm due a fair payout from a car accident I had recently and it's due fairly soon. DP is strongly suggesting I spend the money on the house and put the remnants into savings. I'm advocating splurging on a holiday and putting some in the pot for the DC.

My argument being if I put it all into the house it will just get swallowed up on nothingness whereas if it gets splurged on a holiday at least we've had something positive and fun out of something pretty nasty.

AIBU or is DP?

Well I'm recently unemployed so would have to save it till Im back in work but otherwise it would be holiday.

Just had the same thing - new carpets throughout and a holiday to paradise!

Why go for one? try both

Plus a pair of fab shoes for me and a Wii game for ds - though would swop it all not to have the accident tbh

Don't want to piss on your chips Hiding, but could the nature of your accident mean that you might need further physiotherapy/ medical treatment ? Might be worth putting a bit aside into a specific savings account solely for that.

Don't care what you do with it, but it should be a joint decision. If it was us - utterly inconceivable that we wouldn't both decide. It wouldn't occur to either of us that it was separate money for one person to decide on.

and we don't even have a joint bank account - still can't imagine it

Out ut towards your mortgage? Goes to the house but doesnt just get swallowed up helps the whole family. I don't belive it is just your money btw. If a bloke came on mumsnet and said its my money he would ripped a new one.

inertia that makes perfect sense and no pissing happening :) i'm already in long term physio as a result of a pre-existing condition, the accident set me back to square one of this treatment but it will continue on the NHS (thankfully!) so, touch wood, i shouldn't need to set any aside for private care. I'm also under a couple of NHS clinics for the condition which are aware of the impact the accident has had on my care and they are also fine with me effectively restarting my treatment programme with them again, which is a shitter, because before the accident I was actually making some progress with it!

In short. The NHS is continuing my care but thanks for the heads up! :)

gooseberry I am beginning to agree in all fairness I just don't like the thought of the money going on what our salaries would otherwise pay for.

lola we're very lucky in that we have no rent or mortgage to pay on the house otherwise I would be of the same opinion - cut the mortgage down.

Is it enough to have a holiday and put some aside?

I agree that new carpets and decorating aren't an investment in terms of the house, more a 'nice to have' - which puts them in the same category as holidays IMO.

Technically speaking if the settlement included an element of special damage for care/assistance provided by your husband (I'd be really surprised if it didn't) then that part of the money belongs to him, not you. In any case it should be a joint decision.

I suggest a compromise.

Spend half of it on something frivolous, and then squander the rest.

Oh bloody hell in that case Id probaby go on a holiday

Weellll unless you need stuff doing urgently for the house like new windows or a new heating system then I'd say go on holiday. Carpets and curtains are just accessories really (unless living with bare floorboards presently) and spending a windfall on carpets and curtains would be a bit like spending it on new mugs, or a nice cushion.

Holidays create moments to be cherished.

My dad died a couple of years ago and left me a small inheritance. When I got it last year I asked DH what we should do with it - he told me "it's your money, do what you like with it!"

It was a toss-up between having the lounge completely refashioned and redecorated or going on a lovely family holiday.

So I decided on a compromise. We recently got back from a fortnight's All Inclusive in Cuba - I have no regrets at all

I have a parrot, would you like to buy him?

We spent the tax rebate on upgrading the car and a hol, we spent less on a car than he would have liked and less on a hol than I would have liked but both got our way so are happy!

You have been hurt and in pain, probably not able to do/enjoy certain things with the family for some time, am I right? I think a holiday would be good for the entire family. Fun memories, tons of pics.vids to look back on, reviving of spirits and all of that. It doesn't have to take up all of your money, save some for the children, or towards next summers holiday. Mental health is important too.

So, I guess I like your plan.

Carpets, paint and a holiday.

I know someone welsh who has a parrot that speaks in a welsh accent.

Id want new carpets so I'm not the best person to ask!