OK. What I actually want to do is have a paid job, but I suffer from a sometimes very severe mental illness, meaning that any employer would get very annoyed very quickly at my erratic behaviour and time off. I won't go into the details, but the relevant ones are that sometimes I find it hard to judge what is an appropiate amount of time and effort to put into things. While I can sometimes be very very productive, often I take it too far and cause problems and become ill. However, I sometimes get very depressed too - I need a steady amount of activity and a rigid routine.
I would really like to "give something back", but I'm not sure how. I can't do anything where people are relying on me, as I would have too much time off, but ideally it would be something quite structured. Most of the time you wouldn't know I was ill, but anyone who saw me regulary would most probably notice, and sometimes I do embarrasing things, so I would need a suppirtive environment where I wouldn't be judged for being a bit mental sometimes.
Hobbies wise, I do a basic cooking class, which, while it is a bit below my skill level in itself, is enough of a challenge on bad days, as it involves going out, catching an irregular bus, getting there on time, sitting still and listening for two hours and interacting with other people. So you can see my difficulties.
However, I am actually quite clever (not like I want to blow my own trumpet, but I was heading for a 1st at uni in English and Social Policy, so basic literacy etc aren't really relevant) and I would be capable of a light workload of challenging work, if that makes sense.
I enjoy gardening, but I know nothing about it. Same with crafts - I tend to just make it up as I go along. I'm a member of the Labour Party, Fawcett (a feminist organisation) and the Fabian Society (a lefty organisation), and have pretty much the political values that they represent (I have a few problems with Labour, but mostly). I would quite like to volunteer doing some kind of mentoring or advice as I live in quite a deprived area, but again there is a risk I would become too involved or let people down.
I have a 4yo and 1yo, who attend nursery part time. DH works part time and my ILs live nearby and are very supportive. I don't (can't) drive, but do have a bus pass.
I really, really don't want to sit at home twiddling my thumbs, and in fact it would be awful for my health. There really must be a way I could be helpful, but I'm not sure what. I keep asking if there are any schemes or anything, but they are either for people who are so ill that they need a day centre, or for people with an aim to get back to work soon - I've been told to forget that for at least a couple of years :(
So...ideas? Hobbies, volunteering, activism or anything. As long as it gets me out of the house, has a regular routine and not too much responsibility, but ideally is a bit challenging and interesting.
I live in a small town which is between Sunderland and Newcastle.
Sorry for the rant. 