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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To put TV and VHS player in 3 year old DD's room?

89 replies

LauLauLemon · 01/07/2011 23:35

DH suggested we put a TV in DD1's room today with a VHS player so she can watch old disney films.

I've always been against it but I found myself thinking it was a good idea and doing it. There's no Freeview or even normal TV channels, just the VHS player and TV.

Too far for a 3 year old? She doesn't watch too much TV but enough that The Princess and the Goblin makes me want to hurl myself into a wall despite it being my childhood favourite.

AIBU?

OP posts:

rainbowinthesky · 03/07/2011 20:22

God, no.

Baileysismyfriend · 03/07/2011 20:24

I wouldn't, 3 is far too young and I'm not a big fan of having TVs in the bedroom anyway, we have one in our house and thats with a nearly 13 year old and we manage. Children watching TV alone seems an anti social habit to get into.

RuthChan · 03/07/2011 20:26

I agree with everyone else.
I think it's a bad idea.
You would completely lose the ability to control what, how much, how often and when your DD watched TV.

BulletWithAName · 03/07/2011 20:26

My DC have a TV and DVD player in their room and watch a DVD before going to bed. I'm sure that in the future, they'll both turn out to be mass murderers and it will be all down to the fault of that darned TV player and DVD in the bedroom.

Original poster

LauLauLemon · 03/07/2011 20:28

We don't have a TV in our room and there's only the TV in the living room which we don't watch too much of (bar CBeebies and DVD's).

She doesn't need it to fall asleep. She has a bed time story every night without fail, gets a kiss and falls asleep on her own. This has been the way until now.

I'll be removing it from her room tomorrow. I showed DH this thread and he agrees.

OP posts:

RuthChan · 03/07/2011 20:31

Good call!! :)

M0naLisa · 03/07/2011 20:37

My boys have a tv in their bedroom they watch a film on a night before bed, but they fall to sleep with the tv on. Its been in there since DS1 was 2. No harm in it.

pointythings · 03/07/2011 20:37

No TV in any bedrooms here - that includes DH and me. Bedrooms are for sleeping.

DDs are 8 and 10 and for about 2 years now know that they are allowed downstairs at a set time on a weekend morning and turn TV on - low volume. It works well.

rainbowinthesky · 03/07/2011 20:38

Anyone here ever read the posts by adults who can't fall asleep without the tv on?

LunarRose · 03/07/2011 20:39

Actually I think it can be a good thing - but I have an early riser (in summer if it starts with a 5 it can be a boon) . Also DS has ASD so if we have people round (christmas etc) it can be absolutely essential for him when he has had enough of the social interaction to be able to take himself off and watch a video in his room. If we had only on TV in the living room, it would interrupt what everyone else is doing and not give him the down time he needs

Would definitely not recommend it at bedtime (told dd I would remove it if she had it on) and with it being videos (not connected to an aerial), it's really easy to control what they watch.

babybythesea · 03/07/2011 20:55

rainbowinthesky: Anyone here ever read the posts by adults who can't fall asleep without the tv on?

No, but I have come across kids on trips (school visits, guide camps etc) who are struggling, as they all do, with the strangeness of the situation anyway, and then can't cope with the additional stress of having no TV to fall asleep to. It's not nice, trying and failing to comfort a weeping 11 year old because she has no way of soothing herself off to sleep. And you can't manage to magic a tv for them on a trip away so you just have to leave them to it. It's all so new and scary anyway - it really isn't the time for them to learn a new skill (how to get myself to sleep) and it can make it so much worse for them.

rainbowinthesky · 03/07/2011 21:02

You might have misunderstood me. The point of my post is that it is not a good thing as these adults have not learnt the skill as a child!

oohjarWhatsit · 03/07/2011 21:08

My 4 year old DD1 has had one in her room since she was 2 and is quite happy to take herself off upstairs to watch films in her room, she also needs them to sleep these day as DP works and I have full time care of DD1 and a 1 year old DD2 to contend with, we haven't had time for bedtimes stories in yonks!

awww, how sad is that :( poor little scrap

oohjarWhatsit · 03/07/2011 21:10

Anyone here ever read the posts by adults who can't fall asleep without the tv on?

my OH cant sleep without the telly on since being a kid, left to his own devices (mum died, dad worked) and falling asleep with telly on for company.

flipthefrog · 03/07/2011 21:13

i don't particularly like the way tv is really derided these days

if a child went to sleep reading a book, they would be applauded on here, yet finding joy in watching movies isn't approved of at all.

i really dislike the notion that unless it's a book, children have no right to be entertained in other ways

LunarRose · 03/07/2011 21:43

Actually flipthefrog I can see your point - I have stayed up way too late when I've got into a book, so I don't think the problem is limited to TV.....

Also kids can become dependent on a variety of different things to fall asleep TV, books favorite toy, music, mobile (when a baby) night light, I suppose in response to Babybythesea, the point is to consider whether the habit is portable and likely to disturb others.

I remember my neice going on a school trip where the teacher arranged the sleeping based on those who needed a night light and those who were disturbed by it... I wonder how that would go down if it was applied to the TV problem and TV supplied.....

BulletWithAName · 03/07/2011 21:49

flipthefrog- totally agree

MummyTigger · 03/07/2011 22:24

I will say, I frequently doze off to the sounds of my partners' tv program of choice. I find it relaxing and very soothing, especially if it's something I've seen before - so it doesn't engage me as much as something new would.

My younger brother is ten, and he has a DVD for 30 minutes before bed. Has done since he was something like 4. We used to have to go in and force it off amidst protests, but after about 3 months of regular interfering and making sure it was only 30 minutes, I now how to go in and make sure it's turned off because he's sound asleep after ten minutes! Doesn't even stir when I go in :) So I agree provided it's done properly.

Nanny0gg · 03/07/2011 22:31

I don't think reading a book can be compared to watching the tv.
Can it? Really?

BulletWithAName · 03/07/2011 22:33

Nanny0gg-Why not? My DP's nan is semi-illiterate and the TV is a lifeline to her for the news etc. She can't just pick up a book for her entertainment or education.

seeker · 03/07/2011 22:43

Watching a screen and reading a book are both equally valid activities. However, watching a screen uses different parts of the brain and stimulates the brain in a way that can make sleep very difficult. Reading a book does not do this.

For this reason, if not for any other, children should not watch TV immediately before bed.

Daydreaming · 03/07/2011 22:52

I think a lot of people are in denial about how damaging it is for children to watch large amounts of television.

exoticfruits · 03/07/2011 23:03

YABU.

LunarRose · 03/07/2011 23:06

Seeker - if your an avid reader, reading a book you're into can definitely affect your ability to sleep.

LunarRose · 03/07/2011 23:07

Nann0gg - Depends on the quality of TV - or lack of quality of book!!!!

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