To stop taking oral contraception for selfish reasons?

[SnowinAfrica]

My partner and I see each other probably three times a fortnight. Once mid week and every other weekend. I can't take combined pill because of migraines and because it made me put on loads of weight (and turned me into a psycho potential serial killer) and so we used condoms for ages. He hates them, I hate them. So I offered to try the progesterone only pill which I've now been using for around 3 months.
Well I'm rapidly putting on weight and although the sex is better (not that I have much of an appetite for it anyway) I'm really struggling with this pill.
The worst bit about it is that DP and I are both on diets and both trying to lose weight. Every few days he texts me all excited saying he's lost another lb. I'm furious because despite me being a bloody angel with my food, I'm at best staying the same weight, at worst actually putting weight ON. It's making me really resentful.
The thing is he REALLY struggles with condoms, the faffing etc makes him lose his erection sometimes, he can't climax very well with them either and the ONLY issue I have with this pill is the weight gain. No other negatives but the weight gain is a massive issue to me.
He'll be gutted if I stop taking it but is it really selfish of me to want to just so I can lose weight?

Sorry to hijack but I'm in similar position in that I'm on the minipill and the weight is slipping on and I'm getting a bit down. What was it like having the coil inserted (do you have the normal one rather than the Mirena?)?

In those circumstances I'd chart my cycles and use:

• condoms on most fertile days
• diaphram until ovulation (but not on most fertile days)
• and nothing post ovulation.

YANBU but there are many different brands of mini pill, with different doses of hormone which may suit you better. It may be a bit of a faff finding one through trial and error - also need to give some time for them to settle - but any family planning clinic should be able to advise you.

YANBU and not selfish at all. Do you really hate them or do you actually hate him moaning and huffing and puffing and making a big deal about using them (if that's what he's doing)? If he's making a big deal about putting on one then it can kill the mood a bit, but he CAN get used to the 'faffing' with condoms, practice makes perfect.

DH and I have been using them for several years now and although they can take away the spontaneity sometimes if we want a quickie in the kitchen we don't have any problems with them..

Try putting a tiny bit of lube on him before he puts the condom on, that could help the not climaxing very well issue. And you should practice putting them on him too. I can put one on him with my mouth and my DH hardly notices, it's all in the timing

i found that pill does make you put on weight , but less than a pg !!!!

what about vasectomy if he doesnt like condoms?

I think the problem lies in the way he goes about things. For example we'll start on the foreplay and then he'll stop and start faffing with a condom but will practically start up a conversation about them going on about how these ones are better/worse than the last ones or how he hopes it doesn't kill the mood etc etc and its the bloody chatty thing that totally kills the mood.

I don't know, I'm wondering if half of my reluctance to try anything else is down to the fact that I'd rather not be having sex anyway. I'd just rather go without.

Get natural feel condoms or the very featherlight ones. I have side effects to anything hormone related and am allergic to latex too. These types of condom such as Avanti are a much better solution IMO.

Do you think it's the pill making you not interested in sex? Did you feel that way before you went on it?

Have you told him that all the chatting kills the mood?