Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

to think that I'm just a bloody useless paranoid parent

27 replies

brightongirldownunder · 28/06/2011 23:49

..because I'm beginning to think I am one...
I have 2 kids - DD is 4 and amazing, adorable, as is DS who is 4 months. After the very traumatic birth of giant DS, I thought I was in control, but after a series of nursing strikes and then milk flow problems I started to feel very worn down and worried about the smallest things that he did that didn't seem right. On Friday he had a nasty fall onto the back of his head and alongside that I was noticing he had developed a repetitive movement that looked like a spasm (after comparing to one on youtube..I know, i know...). Now of course he showed no signs of odd behaviour after the fall, and the weird movement had been happening for a month or so, but I still started thinking brain damage and/or epilepsy. I took DS to the doctor today, thanks to some great advice on here and he told me that he thought DS was thriving. However he hadn't seen this weird movement as he was fine for the 5 mins doc saw us for. Of course when we got home he started doing it again....
This has led me to think i should go for a 2nd opinion..

My mind is so screwed up - am i overreacting? Or am I basing everything on a viable mother's instinct? Whatever it is I am a complete and utter mess...

OP posts:

mrswhiskerson · 28/06/2011 23:59

I would get a second opinion purely to put your mind at rest, if there is something wrong he will get treatment faster and if not you will feel much better . Please don't worry about seeming paranoid or over reacting , you love your dc more than life itself you are bound to worry and if a doctor doesn't understand tough.
Are you ok ? You sound stressed out , is there anyone who can look after your dcs and give you some time to yourself?

I hope your ds is ok .

learningtofly · 29/06/2011 00:03

bless them dc's arent prone to performing for their 5 minutes in front of the GP!

If you are still worried I would go back to the GP and take some video footage if you can to show them. When you say spasms whereabouts is this repetative movement?

skybluepearl · 29/06/2011 00:07

record the movement on you phone and show it to gp if you can

enjolraslove · 29/06/2011 00:07

I would go again just to put your mind at rest. but don't worry you are not crazy - when dd was newborn she made really wierd noises in her sleep. I actually taped her and played it for the doctor. they didn't laugh (they were very sweet) but quietly assured me that newborns are odd and do odd things and not to worry

worraliberty · 29/06/2011 00:19

Great idea skyblue

Sorry OP but try not to beat yourself up about it

Original poster

brightongirldownunder · 29/06/2011 00:32

I'm so stressed it's untrue. I will try and video his movements. They're basically a stretching outwards of the arms and he squishes his face in at the same time as if he was doing a giant poo. Initially I found this funny as he was always focussed on me when he did it but now it's just worrying me and I have seen enough film footage online to convince myself it could be infantile spasms...which I think is a precurser to epilepsy. Even writing this I can see I sound mad. I overreacted in a similar way when he started refusing to feed properly.

OP posts:

HowlingBitch · 29/06/2011 00:39

If you could show the youtube video that emulates the movements (and I am not being nosy) it may help. Some of those videos are very misleading.

MumblingRagDoll · 29/06/2011 00:46

Oh I remmeber being very similar....and after a traumatc birth too! I am stll paranoid about certain things and DD1 is nearly 7!

The movement you describe sounds very normal in a tiny baby....does he do it more at certain times of the day? Maybe when he's tired or particularly content?

HowlingBitch · 29/06/2011 00:49

BTW you do not sound mad. A mad parent would not give a fig about their childs' health. You just seem nervous and that is fine. That is what MN here for. :)

winnybella · 29/06/2011 00:56

Definitely record the movements and take them to the doctor. In the very unlikely case it is IS early intervention is crucial.

Otoh I have convinced myself that DD had it-she didn't. I forgot what that reflex is called - the sort of unfolding of the body thing-it's normal up to certain age- if he does it in clusters I would definitely record and show the doc.

Original poster

brightongirldownunder · 29/06/2011 00:58

I daren't go on YouTube again as it'll make me upset and I won't sleep...
I really hope he's just showing his little character as he's such a good baby and a real chubby smiler. He looks 8 months old though even though he's only 4.....
I'm going to try and sleep now and think positive thoughts and will talk to doc in morning

OP posts:

greenbananas · 29/06/2011 01:20

Hope you've had a good night's sleep...

Good luck with the doctors. Showing the doctor equivalent footage from Youtube is a great idea.

We all worry about our children, and that's natural. You wouldn't be a good parent if you didn't worry just a little bit

Original poster

brightongirldownunder · 29/06/2011 22:22

OK - I have had time to dwell on what he is doing, trying to convince myself that i am actually thinking ahead of myself and accepting a worst case scenario. He seems to do these movements when he is either excited/frustrated/confused. He did them in the high chair earlier, I panicked and then thought..."but he's still only 4 months - he shouldn't even be in a high chair". The main problem is that he looks almost 8 months old, and I think eveyrone expects him to behave like one. I am still worried as as soon as I laid him down in the bath he did them continuously, but on sitting him up they disappeared immediately. Bizarre...
Am videoing them as we have a referral to a paediatrician, thank god..

OP posts:

shakey1500 · 29/06/2011 22:28

Absolutely take video footage and show it to the doctors. You are not being paranoid, you are being worried. Instinct is important and a lot of doctors understand that.

My ds had episodes of "thrashing about" when asleep. I recorded it on my prehistoric phone as I knew it wouldn;t be witnessed otherwise (well, not without obs in a sleep clinic etc). The consultant was fab and took me seriously. Thankfully he was able to reassure me all was well and reiterated that I was NOT unreasonable to be worried even though my fears were unfounded.

Knackeredmother · 29/06/2011 22:28

Could it be a startle/Moro reflex?

greycircles · 29/06/2011 22:31

Don't think you're mad, you just love your kids and worry about them. That's fine, particularly after a traumatic birth. Try not to worry and you are doing the right thing covering all the possibilities.

winnybella · 29/06/2011 22:34

It could be just Moro-does he do it when he feels unsafe re support for his back?

Original poster

brightongirldownunder · 29/06/2011 22:46

Oh my goodness, have just watched Moro reflex on youtube and thats pretty much what it is - hands out, back arched, face scrunched...
But does it explain why he does it in the highchair - lack of support? As soon as he's comfortable, he doesn't seem to do it. The times it happens in clusters are always when he is standing up/sitting down/lying in bath...all of which are situations he may feel slighty uneasy in, especially at 4 months..
Will check this with paed, along with video footage, but am hoping this is it...
THANKYOU. At least I have a bit more hope that this may be something other than IS.

OP posts:

Original poster

brightongirldownunder · 29/06/2011 23:05

Just as i start to calm down, I read that the moro reflex is not that normal to happen in 4+ month olds and could suggest there is a problem..
i think i'll stay off google until we go to the appointment.
Can I ask for some advice re:this appointment? If it is in more than a few weeks time, should I ask to see someone sooner? If there is a chance that it is something more than moro, surely i need this sorted asap?

OP posts:

LauLauLemon · 29/06/2011 23:21

I would get a second opinion just to make sure but you are not a bloody useless parent. Paranoid? Maybe but we all are to some degree and at some point.

When DD1 was nine months she fell off our sofa on to very thin and cheap carpet covering a concrete floor. She cried and was fine but I still rushed to the hospital and spent nine hours in an emergency room waiting to be seen with her even though she was crawling around playing happily. I, on the other hand, was in tears for much of the nine hour wait beating myself up about the what if's and social services coming to take DD1 off me.

Knackeredmother · 29/06/2011 23:25

My dd still had the Moro reflex at that age. I too worried. Completely normal nearly 4 year old now.
It is sooooo difficult not to worry when you've had a traumatic birth. Get it checked just to put your mind at rest.

winnybella · 30/06/2011 08:44

I think Moro shouldn't persist past 5 mo. I'm sure DD still had it at 4-5 mo.

HelloKlitty · 30/06/2011 09:01

The blinking internet! It's a mine of information which is great but sometimes it causes us parents such worry! OP have you recently moved to Oz? I lmoved to live in Oz when my first DD was 2 months and I was SO anxious! How long have you been there?

VeronicaCake · 30/06/2011 10:20

I've just been diagnosed with epilepsy and like you have been obsessively reading everything I can find online. As far as I can tell whilst myoclonic jerks may be a sign of seizure disorder in infancy almost all of these disorders are benign, meaning your child will grow out of them and no lasting damage is likely.

In fact if it is a form of epilepsy (and that is still an if - the Moro explanation sounds plausible too and I'm pretty sure DD still startled weirdly at 4m too) the fact that the main symptom is spasms is a good thing.

You are absolutely right to ask for a paediatric referral. Since you are still anxious you should call your GP and ask for a chat but I suspect their advice will be not to panic. If your baby were to have convulsions or lose consciousness you should go straight to A&E. In the meantime the condition is unlikely to become worse if you have to wait a few weeks for a diagnosis.

maggie101 · 28/10/2011 03:44

My 9 month old has been having simliar 'tremors' i call them where her arms stiffen straight & upper body & face spasms. they first occurred 7 days ago when she was sitting. she was fine afterwards chatty and happy & it only lasted 5 seconds or less. i too fear to look at aything on the internet as i am scared as to what i will find. i live in oz and the weather has been getting warmer of late which maybe a factor, i don't know but hope so. i took her to my gp who adviced i take her straight to emergency. once there the drs did a through check, took bloods and said her development was fine, head size etc all where she is supposed to be at. they did refer her to a paedtrician and she now needs to have an EEG test which checks the electrical signals in her brain. however, over the last day and a half she has had none of these tremors and appears fine. she is eating normally too, despite teething badly. she already has 4 and another 4 coming in fast. i thought it could be the pain associated with that as she rarely cries from teething but the drs said thats very unlikely as with any potential food allergy.

I am worried out of my mind as we have to wait 2 weeks for the EEG test and another week for paedtriican to interpret the results. i feel in my heart she will be fine but of course its very scarey. i have taken a video of one episode and the dr said to get as many as possible. has anyone else been through this or their child had an EEG test?

Flip

1 2