AIBU to be annoyed that my DD probably wont be able to join the Rainbows? (Brownies)

[RainbowGuides]

Have namechanged for this...

My DD who is 5 would like to join the Rainbows (younger Brownies), there is only one group operating in our local area. It is run from the local Synagogue and the girls that attend are all Jewish. I asked for an application and applied but was surprised to see that one of the questions asks about your religion and which synagogue you attend.

I questioned this and said we are not Jewish nor do we attend synagogue so would my DD get a place. I was told that I could apply and my name would be put on the waiting list however girls that were Jewish or attended the local synagogue would get priority. Meaning my DD would forever be on the waiting list as those that come on it after would be moved above her as they are Jewish IYSWIM and she would never actually be able to join.

My problem here is that the Girl Guides association is supposed to be a INTERNATIONAL programme that is open to girls of any religion, creed or nationality and is supposed to accept diversity and multi culturism. Their policies include equality and diversity. So why is it that the ONLY Rainbows unit in my area is only for those of the Jewish faith?

I did speak to someone at the local Brownies office and she did agree that it wasnt right and stated that if there is only 1 group in the area it is supposed to be open to all.

This is not a post slamming Judaism - so please no racial hatred posts. I just want to know if IABU to expect that this Rainbows group should take girls of any faith as that is what the Girl Guides is about and they are NOT following its ethos at all??

Like kando, I am a Guider, although with a Guide unit (girls aged 10-14). If it is hard to find a place for a SN girl because of her disability, I would hope that is only because of maintaining appropriate adult/girl ratios. We have guidelines as to the number of girls we can have in the unit which is directly related to the number of adults - Rainbows are 1 adult/5 girls, Brownies are 1/8 (I think) and Guides are 1/12. Units I have worked with have included girls with some additional needs, however if we were asked to take in someone who needs close care - the direct attention of an adult all or even most of the time - we would have to make sure that we had an extra adult over and above our normal number, because otherwise the logistics don't work. And finding that extra adult can be the problem.

In our area we have really struggled to find enough volunteers to keep open the units we have with the minimum adult cover; we just don't have an extra volunteer to hand. So in that case I can see that I may just have to regretfully say no, if the family could not send an adult to stay during meetings. I'd hate doing that, but I have to think of the safety of the whole group. Maybe a sixth former at school doing a Duke of Edinburgh award would agree to become a unit helper as the service part of their award. That would be one avenue we would look at. As a parent and with a paid job myself, I can see that it can be hard to stay at a youth group for all kinds of reasons, and I can also understand a parent wanting their daughter to join Guides without having their own parent in tow - it is a great part of learning independence, after all. But I can't just magic up additional Guiders from thin air, so I could be stuck between a rock and a hard place.

Our unit is full to the gunnells and running a waiting list for places. I take girls onto my list in order of their parents contacting me, and when a space becomes available the first girl on the list who is actually old enough to join at that time gets the place. There is only one way around the list (and yes, I have been asked...) and that is for a parent or close relative of that child to be an adult helper on a regular basis (at least fortnightly) in a Girlguiding unit. Not necessarily our unit - for example, if they help at the Brownie unit I still prioritise their daughter. So if a parent were to team up with a friend to alternate weeks so that we always have one adult helping out, I would take both daughters - because 1 extra adult means that (space and maximum unit size permitting) we can take up to 5/8/12 more girls.

have you thought about starting up a similar, non religous type thing yourself/ would shorten waiting lists and get over the problem?

You could do what I am doing and set up your own group.
DD never got in because of waiting lists and never started until Brownie age so I was massively encouraged to set up my own Rainbows by the Guiding association. They give training and support every step of the way.

I agree with WizardofOs, it certainly sounds as if there is demand in your area. get together with another mum or two and start your own unit. You will get lots of support from the local commissioners and other leaders.

Another Brownie Guider pitching in to support the idea of opening another Rainbow unit. You'll get training and a start up grant too.

OP, you say that you can't because of working full time and having 2DCs... well I work full time, have two DCs, lead Brownies and help at Beavers a couple of times each term too. It's perfectly possible.

And regarding the Guide Promise... it's not to "love God", it's "love my God". The 'my' is very important. Your interpretation of what constitutes your own personal 'god' is entirely your business and yours alone.

Scouting is different. Scouting does require a 'belief in a higher being'.

For some of us, promising to "love my God" is really not different from expressing belief in a higher being.

But I do agree that running or helping with youth organisations can be a lot of fun, DP and I got sucked into leading a group cos we were spending that evening dropping off and picking up anyway so we thought we might as well stay and do the middle bit too. So it needn't take up that much more time than just taking and fetching. Though I agree it's not everyone's cup of tea, hanging out with 20 children for the fun of it, but we like it (mostly). And it is very rewarding having a gaggle of wildly enthusiastic kids enjoying the club.