to ask what is acceptable level of grunge for 6yo

[EndangeredSpecies]

DS has 6 pairs of shorts, 5 of them stained, 3 terminally. Six t-shirts bought/given in last 3 months, three now stained. He recently decorated his duvet cover and lime green bed sheet with black paint, I am not buying a new one. Feet permanently black from running around barefoot. Face usually covered in dried weetabix, arm tattooed in felt tip. Runs away if shower or facecloth are mentioned. Wipes hands on chair covers instead of napkin, think it's hysterically funny.

Aibu to let him run around like this and reduce bedroom and rest of house to pigsty or should I be concerned.

I would stop at Nirvana, certainly not go past Pearl Jam, and Mud Honey really is for the 12+.

well his hair is more royal marines than kurt cobain, that's a blessing I suppose.

have you thought about installing a sheep dip style tunnel? that way you could herd him into an enclosed space, dunk him in mild bleach and then let him run free again :)

one a week ought to do it.....

nice idea becky, I'll get onto it just as soon as I've finished removing encrusted ketchup splodges from the walls.

I wouldn't toletrate the hand wiping on furniture, no way jose, but the rest of it - meh. It's what little boys do ime so far!

the clothes & the feet wouldnt worry me, typical boy
the duvet and wiping on furniture i would knock on the head, its not on, and he may do it at other peoples houses

There's not much you can do about the grubby clothes..it's nice to see them enjoying themselves without having to worry about things like that.

But at 6yrs old, he's more than old enough not to be misusing paints and pens...also there's no way he should be running away when you want him to do anything.

Lots of kids don't like having their faces wiped or getting in the bath but it's part of life.

Every time he wipes stuff on the furniture/walls he loses a privilege i.e. TV, computer, going out to play. Knock it on the head now!

The rest I wouldn't worry about. Someone at school will soon call him smelly or dirty and he will be mortified (hopefully)!

Oh yes and re the chair covers...he'd be scrubbing it clean if he was my DS!

Most of it sounds like 'boy' or 'child' and is goooodddd but some is spilling over in to lack of respect and destructiveness which you need to get in check now. For the dirt - swim more !

I've tried taking privileges away, he just goes and does something else naughty in retaliation. At one stage he had every "special" toy (and he doesn't have that many) taken away, plus he was kept in and not allowed out with his sister, it had no effect.

He keeps trying to turn the tables on me, whatever I say "right mummy you're not going out now", "I'm taking your computer away" (I work from home). Argh.

The rudeness and deliberatly wiping hands on furniture - no way IMO. DS tends to wipe his on his thighs now though so not sure its mcuh better. He'll go to wipe on sofa, stop, rememeber we don't do this but he is wearing trousers.

Paint is allowed here but with 'rules' and if they are broken paint banned for period of time.

Clothes - I've learnt to buy cheap and take all 2nd hand clothes offered.

My DS is 6 and doesn't tend to worry about getting dirty but will have a shower at end of the day as likes to get clean again.

Sounds like his lack of respect for you is a bigger problem than his grubbiness tbh.

My 2 (boys) are perpetually dirty (except in the few minutes after they get out of the bath) but wiping hands on the furniture etc IS NOT ON.

He is pushing boundaries. Keep them firm and stay consistent - it doesn't matter if he says he is taking your computer away etc, ignore that. Get him to clean up any mess he makes properly too.

Midori, I think I might love you.

Most of this sounds 100% normal.

But I would suggest you insist that he keeps his filth on his person on in his room. Clearly he won't notice thus spontaneously, as it just doesn't register with the permanently grubby, so you will have to teach him about the standards you want in the rest of the house.

Yes barbarianmum you are spot on... he is pushing boundaries, it's just that he pushes all of them, every day, all the time. Compared to some of his antics (like running away in car parks), wiping hands on furniture is quite tame. He's always been hard to handle and full on, but now we think it might be jealousy. DD3 was born in Feb, although she's 4 months now and I thought he might have got over it by now. He's recently taken to drinking milk several times a day, imitating the baby?
I have him at home full-time for the next 13 weeks. Perhaps we will be featuring on Homes from Hell in the near future.

TobyLerone, why thank you, I love your user name.