A crazy long 3 week confusing start into reception class in Sept!

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My DS2 is starting school in Sept - I thought that it would be the standard few days of mornings and then mornings and lunch then start school. (He currently does 3 full days at nursery school on the days I am at work ,with an afterschool club that we pick them both boys up from.)

But NO I have just been to a meeting and it is the most complicated 3 week carnival around. I can not even begin to think how we are going to manage it short of taking unpaid parental leave.

It is as follows:
Week 1 - Monday to Wednesday - Teacher and TA doing home visits to every single child starting school = 3 days of no school and no childcare available as can no longer attend nursery = 3 days off work.
Thursday - children surnames A-K to attend school in morning 9 til 11.45
Friday - children with surnames A-K to attend in afternoon 1.15 to 3.30
(visa versa for children with the surnames L-Z which means I can't even share with my best friend as she is P surname and I am a H surname)

Week 2 - School 9 til 11.45
Parents invited to attend lunch from 11.45 to 12.30 with their child on either Wed/Thurs or Fri depending which class your child is in.
All very undoable with work, I cant really go in at 9.30 after dropping off and then leave at 11 to pick up from school.

Week 3 - School staying for lunch 9 til 12.30
Again confusing as the lunch time break lasts until 1.15pm so this means they will just eat their lunch and go home, no exposure to the playground.

Then finally on 26th Sept they start full time school!!

I just can't understand why it is so bloody confusing! I really don't know what to do short of cancelling my summer holiday and taking it in Sept but that is unfair on my DS1 as he wont get extra time with me in the summer holidays.

OP our DS is starting the nursery class in school this autumn and we have a very similar settling in - seems like chaos to me and is very annoying.

Cripes, that is bonkers!

Our 'staggering' was morning and afternoon sessions based on summer or winter birthdays.

Winter birthdays (oldest) went full time sooner, the summer born a couple of weeks later, but all in place full time by Christmas I think.

the first term is EXHAUSTING for them, expect runny noses all autumn, and bugs by half term. (sorry!)

Good lord.

I had no idea about this (no DCs yet). I'd assumed DCs would simply start full time on day 1 - like I did. Yes there were a few tears from children in my class but they quickly settled in. And that was when most children didn't go to nursery like they do now.

YANBU totally. Is there any evidence that children do better with this "drip feed" start rather than starting full time?

That's insane! We have 9 till 3:15 from day one - parents are not welcome to hang around and may not come in for lunch etc - it's drop at the door and bugger off please! Anything else had to be discussed with the head in advance. And you know what, every single child coped just fine. There was one January child who did half days for a month but that was it.

My friend has a similar problem and has contacted the LA who said she is entitled to a full time school place and she can insist on the school taking her child full time.

Sounds crazy. Do you have parents or in laws nearby who could help out? Or could they stay with you for a couple of weeks if they are retired and do most of the school runs? Not sure what working parents are meant to do in this type of situation.

Well, in all honestly it was fine......for me....coz I still kept my child minder on and between us we managed to get everything covered.....I work between the cm and school so it was quite manageable even though I was running round like a tit in a trance

Yes a nightmare for working parents but I was bloody glad it was only sodding around for 3 weeks rather than4-5 months!

Well the head at my friend's DD school who did this kind of thing for 6 weeks insisited that it did help - but at my DS's school it was a few days and all the kids settled in just fine
but its worth knowing about and mentally setting aside some leave/working out how you can deal with it just in case

I know it looks hideous, but essentially they ARE doing what you had anticipated which was "mornings, then mornings and lunch, then start school". It's just that 'mornings' in a school finish so bloody early!

You say your DS can't attend nursery in Week 1, but have you checked that? You couldn't claim the vouchers, but there's probably no reason he couldn't attend unless they are completely full up.

And then after that, can you take 1 week of unpaid leave, and your DH take 1 week of unpaid leave? Or advertise now for a short-term nanny/mother's help?

YADNBU

My DCs school used to do this it was a total nightmare for parents and often more unsettling for the children. As a summer birthday my DD wouldn't have started school until the last week of September and then it would be half days until after christmas.

Thankfully this has changed from September when DD2 starts other wise I would have really struggled as I also work PT. Now they all start the first week staggered over 3 days and can choose to go full days if parents feel they are ready. This was due to parent pressure and some change in legislation that says all children can choose to start FT in September? Not exactly sure what the legislation is but Im sure your school are aware or maybe check with your LEA.

It's rubbish I know. But just be thankful it's not part-time days for the first term unless you're winter born, and part-time days until the end of the second term if you're summer born! My DS's school makes it clear that they can enforce this if they wish and that no argument of arguing/pleading with the head will change this. They don't tend to and most of the summer born kids are full-time by Christmas.

You can't insist the school takes your child full-time, they don't have to.

YANBU

My dd starts on 11th September, they have split it according to birthday, so the older children start the previous week. She does 9am to 1pm that week, then 9am to 1pm the Monday and Tuesday of the following week, then starts full time on the Wednesday. Not as complicated as your situation, but she has to leave nursery on 31st August, and we already have an inordinate amount of holidays to find for the school year to cover the childcare.

PITA. Still, as long as she settles in

Just a thought if yo don't have a CM and can no longer use nursery, what about wraparound care? My local primary is encouraging parents of children due to start in Sept to take a few days in the summer holidays, to get them used to it. Could you do this and then use them to pick up the gaps?

Please may i just add a small comment?

The teachers and the school have not set out to make life as difficult for the parents as possible, as much as it might feel like that . They will have devised this staggered settling-in programme based on their experience and professional knowledge of how children best adapt to starting school. It might be awkward, it might mean you will have some extra short term child care issues and expenses but if it means that you child settles happily into school life and enjoys the experience from the off set, you will reap the rewards of that staggered start for a long while to come.

Can you just skip that first three weeks (keep him in nursery as usual) and just drop him off at school for the first proper day on the 26th? I can't imagine they'll be learning much during those weeks anyway, with all the coming and going!

speak to the school - explain that he fully used to out of home nursery type placement andhe will have no problem adjusting. therefore you will drop him off for full days from day one.

I doubt very much whether they will change from their plans.

My children's school do this or something very similar. However, any children whose parents work are permitted to stay the whole day.
It is presented as the best way for the child to settle in - the reality is that by the middle of week 2, most kids are pestering to stay, whether their parents work or not as they perceive they are missing out.

How flexible is your work? You could apply for 3 weeks parental leave if you can afford to be unpaid. Or could you.move your work hours over that week? Is there another part time colleague you could cover with?

That's a similar arrangement to the school I'm a Governor at. It really works well for the children and the children are the school's priority.

Of course it would be much easier for working parents if the kids were simply 'thrown in the deep end' but the school obviously knows that is not what's best for the kids.

It is very difficult for some working parents though, I know

speak to the school - explain that he fully used to out of home nursery type placement andhe will have no problem adjusting. therefore you will drop him off for full days from day one

Hahaha! I must admit I spat my coffee out at that one!

They do this at our school. Luckily I already have DD there so was prepared from DS not to start fully until nearer the start of Oct - meeting is tonight so find out definite dates then.

It is a pain in the arse tbh but not much we can do about it. Lots of schools do half days for first term which would be much worse!