First post in AIBU so here goes - a bit of background (it's long sorry)
I moved to London 5 years ago with my autistic DS - we found the most amazing maisonette flat and to this day, I still love the flat itself. However for the last 5 years I have effectively been bullied by my neighbour who lives downstairs. I couldn't go into every single incident but here's a tasty roundup:
- Telling me I made the place look like 'a council house' when actually I am the one who has primarily maintained the joint areas. I feel though tbh this was a jibe at being a single parent
- Having a weird obsession with my washing machine - having a go for putting it on at night, putting it on too much "why do you need to do so much washing anyway" and then when I got a tumble dryer it was that. I should point out it makes no more noise than any other washing machine I have ever encountered. Even when I bought special rubber matting to appease this, it wasn't enough. Add to that noise about the TV / talking with my friends when they come over etc etc - I often wonder if she sits with her ear to the ceiling.
- Having a go at me for 'stomping' to the toilet too late at night. We absolutely, certainly do not stomp around anywhere. In fact I constantly would remind DS to tip toe everywhere which looking back was pointless and stupid. In fact so many things we did to appease her were pointless as she just found something new to complain about.
- Banging on the door and shouting at my babysitter for shouting up the stairs once for my DS to come down and get his coat on
- Continually telling me that I shouldn't be in a flat with a child.
-Then putting up a 6ft fence down the middle of the shared garden without consulting / telling me
-Pushing fag butts under my door that she found in her garden that she is convinced came from me. I didn't even smoke.
Anyway, that was supposed to be a round up. There's loads more petty and ultimately bizarre things. As you can see they are not huge incidences in themselves but over 5 years it has totally worn me down. If I pass her she looks at me as if she scraped me off her shoe. I am now thankfully moving but I received another lovely note from her the other day telling me to cut the hedge at the front of the garden. She claims that since she has paid for it every year except last year (not true, I actually cut it myself the first two years she was here, which she seems to have forgotten, plus the fact I was the only one who mowed the last for the first 2 years too) that I had to fulfill my obligations to maintain the shared areas and 'address the imbalance.'
Now, I'm moving in approximately 2 weeks. I'm currently dealing with DS's transition to secondary school and I am also interviewing for jobs - it's not a huge priority and since I paid for it last year, I had assumed she would pay for it this year. I am worried about her making my life hell before I move. Everyone I know thinks I should just ignore it and let her get on with it.
However, when I used to cut it myself, I asked her if we could cut it down low to make it easier (as it's currently over 6 ft) and she said no because she wanted it to completely cover her windows. (Windows I should point out have those plantation shutters on them so kinda private) There's a teeny weeny part of me that wants to cut the hedge but chop it in half!
I would totally and utterly be stoking the fire wouldn't I? I've been so miserable here though (and I am bitter because as I said, I loved living here apart from that - I have lovely neighbours either side who have never complained about noise and admit they never ever hear us, even when I am playing music) that I feel like I want the last laugh after years of actually being too scared to go into my own garden.
Anyway - so cut the hedge / don't cut the hedge?