To use my elbows on Wed?

[shakey1500]

...in order to gain some advantage in the parents race on my first ever school sports day? It's acceptable behaviour from a 41 year old right? Ds is 3 and it's his mini sports day on Wed and I'm informed there WILL be a parents race. I'm secretly insanely competitive but, despite having two arthritic hips (currently, touch wood, going through a good phase) I'm up against numerous 20year olds.

Any other sneaky underhanded tips I could utilise?

The other mothers will be grateful that you are running so they don't have to.

yes, tie all their laces together...

Set off slightly before the gun, and yes to elbows. If you're going to look as if you are trying, you have to win, or you'll look like an over competitive nit.

The alternative is to be very blase about the whole thing, and look as if you are letting the eager young ones win because it obviously matters to them.

Take your shoes off. Or proper running shoes.

That'll get 'em worried.

Running leggings, spikes, wrist bands. Do a full, very public warm up.

No one else will go near you

Spend a lot of time before the race "limbering up", do it with some real gusto, as though you know what your doing. Lots of loud mumbling about "hitting the wall" in the recent marathon you completed

Oh damn, Leo beat me to it with the warming up!

Can you limp up to the start line clutching your aching hips?

Lull them into a false sense of security?

Definitely spikes, and wear a velcro fastening skirt like the girls in bucks fizz - so you can rip it off at the start line exposing your lycra shorts

OOhhh I'm liking the warm up routine

red bull is a no no

a cup of steroids or two bottles of wine dear

many moons ago when my daughters were in primary school (they are 27 & 24 now) I got entered into the dads race. Now I get very competive and I was running hell for leather to win this race. Well, I say running hell for leather. My upper body was but my legs weren't. Think I slid the last 10 metres on my face

@ineedabodytransplant - you've confirmed my long held opinion that the dads race is the funniest thing in the world. Testosterone city.

I always make sure I wear a good pad during sports day.

Kurrikurri, no it was falling in an elegant way

prettyone, now that statement brings up some odd images..