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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Picnic Hen Do In the Rain with newborn Following C-Section 2 weeks ago...

35 replies

worm77daisy · 18/06/2011 07:47

More of a What Would You Do really...

An old school friends hen do today, organised by her sister. The plan is a picnic in the park, followed by ceramic painting finished off with an evening meal. I had agreed to attend the picnic and painting the meal was suggested yesterday and I have said that wont be able to attend this.

I had a c-section two weeks ago and we shall all be taking our children with us, I planned on leaving my toddler with my husband.

It is pouring with rain here and there is no alternative to the picnic suggested. I do not fancy a picnic in the rain, I do not want to take my two week old to a picnic in the rain...

Would I be unreasonable to not go to the picnic and only the painting. I hate being the person who bails on these things and feel like a right poo bag for even considering it.

OP posts:

MrsDmamee · 18/06/2011 17:45

YA DEF NBU Op, 2 weeks after CS you are still in recovery. Your wound and layers of tissue and muscle need to heal.
After 2 CS's myself I would recomend staying at home as any unnessecary activities could set you back. I ended up in severe pain after a day sitting in the kitchen(on hard chairs) chatting 2 weeks after my 2nd cs. I should have been in my bed or on the nice soft sofa taking it easy.

If you had your appendix out no one would expect you to show up I bet.
Congrats on new baby too.

Honeybee79 · 18/06/2011 20:48

yanbu.

I had a crash c section and 2 weeks post I would have struggled to get up off the floor after sitting there a while.

Who would want to go to a picnic in the rain - c section aside?

babylann · 18/06/2011 20:58

Johnny, 2 weeks after she was born I was up and about, but it wasn't good. I went to a house party and looked very scruffy because I couldn't wear anything that came close to my scar, particularly not jeans which might slip and rub it. It was the middle of summer and so I was feeling very conscious of my personal hygeine, when you have a huge gaping scar on your stomach and a bit of a post-pregnancy muffin top, you feel very gross. I was wandering around, feeling like I was fine, and suddenly I got very sharp pains in my stomach and needed to sit down. But there weren't any seats, and a house party full of people who'd never had C-sections didn't offer me theirs (the way the media portrays it as the easy option "too posh to push" and all that makes people think you should be fine from it, it's just a little bit of nothing-surgery or whatever ). I had to go home early because I felt terrible and luckily nothing came of it, but I definitely started taking it a lot easier after that.

As long as people are aware you're recovering from an operation and there's no period of time where you have to stand around a lot (usually provisions aren't made for seating when the photos are being taken which can take up to an hour, for example) you should be fine to go. But make sure you have an easy way to get home if you start feeling exhausted or poorly.

scattermummy · 18/06/2011 22:44

I would be more concerned with such a boring hen do.IM no party animal,but blimey...ceramic painting,on a hen night! What is wrong with a good old caning season in town with a pink fire engine,or a surfing lesson,actually anything,anything but that.
I think you are lovely to consider even going,but anyone with a brain would not expect it.You should be on the sofa with a blanket and a big bow of benny and jerries with the heating on.

fireblademum · 18/06/2011 22:45

What babylann said. Two weeks later I still could barely sit myself up, and certainly couldn't stand around for any length of time. Take lots of painkillers with you.

fivegomadindorset · 18/06/2011 22:55

Johnny, I was working 10 days after my section, not moving around alot but cooking breakfasts and ironing and looking after DD not the best move but needs must. I went out for the night a when DD was a week old also after a section again was a three line whip, but to be honest felt fine and just sat.

BurningBridges · 18/06/2011 23:12

1st c section was too ill to go out for a month. 2nd was cooking dinner on day 4 whether I liked it or not, I just had to get on with it. Definitely overdid it 2nd time. Everyone is different but I notice quite a few people are saying they overdid it, you might go out, feel fine, an hour later oh oh. Some people who haven't had c sections take great delight in being very blase about it all, oh well its only having a baby don't see what your problem is etc.!

NurseSunshine · 18/06/2011 23:15

YADNBU!

However, is anyone really going to show up to a park, with their children, and sit around in the rain eating scotch eggs? Really?! They ABU!

NestaFiesta · 18/06/2011 23:39

Johnny- two weeks after a section you might feel too emotional, weepy and tired to do anything, you will still have quite heavy lochia so lots of pads, you may be exhausted and you may be very sore. I was advised not to get any soap on the scar and it was bit yukky for a while but cleared up by 6 weeks. On the other hand, you may feel great, this is just my experience.

Hope this helps. Enjoy the wedding but don't expect too much of yourself and don't put obligations to others before your own medical needs such as rest!

johnnyd1 · 19/06/2011 19:28

Thank you so much for all your replys, really don't know what to expect so your honesty definitely gives me somewhere to start from as regards preparation.

OP glad you managed to go and enjoy your afternoon xx

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