To make the kids get their hair cut against their will?

[Lorenz]

Got two boys aged 10 and 12, both have long scruffy hair, both get called tramps, both don't look after it properly, DS1 went to school with greasy hair this morning. I'm sick of it, no need for the scruffyness.

AIBU to make them get their hair cut against their will?

YANBU. They either wash it and keep it nice, or it goes. I'd disagree if they were toddlers but they're old enough to understand that concept.

My brother had long hair, not even greasy, just long when he was a teenager. My dad ordered him to have it cut and frog marched him down to the barbers for a military style short back and sides. There was a huge fight involved.

Maybe offer them an choice - keep it clean or cut it off?

Yes; but it's not unreasonable to make them shower/bathe and wash their hair every other day.

I have to be quite forceful with my two sometimes. Wireless router goes OFF until body and hair cleansing has occurred.

They get a 'posh' haircut for a special treat occasionally (i.e. a proper cut not a pudding bowl horror) and are encouraged into the enterprise by being able to look up and take along their own haircut photos if they want.

But I wouldn't force your kids into it. They'll hold it against you. I know I did when my mother dragged me into "Renee's Hair World" for a ghastly chop when I was about 13.

give them a 2 week grace period, if they keep it clean and neatish they can 'keep it' if not get the lot chopped off

I'm in the offer them the choice camp.
Also, think of how they may take being forced, I can honestly tell you being kicked in the knee by a 13 year old boy who has been forced into my shop isn't much fun.

I'm with LineRunner

No, you can't cut their hair against their will, but you can insist they keep it clean.

Of course it's ok. You're their mother. They are 10 and 12 years old.

Mine moans about getting it cut but the school rule is short hair, so it is cut at the beginning of every term.

YANBU. If they're going around looking scruffy and filthy it reflects badly on you. Looks like you don't care about them. You're the parent & they're just kids, so make them do what needs to be done and use any means at your disposal, fair or otherwise.

yanbu - even if it is clean, it would still need thinned out/tidied up a bit. They dont need to have it cropped, just tidied.

God yes yanbu, I have a ten year old who has to be held down to get his hair cut (severe sn)
Withold treats till they agree to get it done, they are still children and you are responsible for making sure they don't look/smell like tramps.

My ds hates having his hair cut, he likes his hair long and 'surfer style' but needs it neatish for school. He grows it long in the summer holiday but in term time I drag him to get it trimmed.

Definitely at that age they should be able to understand "you can only have it if you look after it"

YANBU - my 8 almost 9 yr old DS hates having his hair cut. DH bought some clippers and does it himself but he still hates it.........he has a double crown and often his hair is sticking up all over the place. We make him have it cut every so often, esp when he starts bearing resemblance to Worzel Gummidge
(sorry showing my age now).