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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not help my mum move house..

7 replies

ToDoodles · 13/06/2011 16:26

Again.

My mums... um, how should i put it, pretty unlucky with money.

She's had to move a lot and we were homeless a few times as kids. Living in b&bs/caravans etc. Most of the money and house from my parents divorce went on posh holidays (6 weeks here 5 weeks there etc etc) in posh hotels and my 'D'F wasn't about.
Just a bit of background.

She does work hard and i realise that its up to her what she spends her money on.

But...
She's still renting places that she can't afford to rent so everytime gets kicked out and has to move.

I am TBH so fucking fed up of bailing her out, giving her money, helping her move, sorting out the bailiffs at the door. I have my own very young family to look after and she does sod all for me..... Oh actually i had a 2 day late birthday card for a big birthday couple years ago and she did baby-sit last month, when the kids were in bed tho Grin

So today she's moving again and my Dsis and DBro are helping her - for the first time!

Aibu telling them that I'm not helping? Am i being a bitch? I've already told them BTW. They weren't impressed.

OP posts:
iwanttoseethezoo · 13/06/2011 16:30

she needs to grow up and take some responsibility for herself. How on earth does she get good enough references to rent anywhere? her credit rating must be appalling if bailiffs are involved? have you told her to rent somewhere cheaper and then STAY THERE? It's cheaper in the long run!

Oh, and no, YANBU.

MrsReasonable · 13/06/2011 16:30

YABU. Disapproving of her finances and helping her move house are not mutually exclusive. You could even use the time to point out your grievances.

TeeBee · 13/06/2011 16:31

YANBU - let them get on with it. Some people don't want to learn from their mistakes - you don't have to let her do this on your time. You're not being a bitch at all IMO.

IndigoBell · 13/06/2011 16:36

YANBU.

izzywhizzyletsgetbusy · 13/06/2011 16:39

YANBU. You've more than done your bit - put your feet up and let your db take up the slack for the next couple of years or so.

YABU MrsReasonable. If someone got stuck into pointing out my shortcomings while I was in the physical process of packing & loading my wordly goods and shifting them to a new home, I'd nuke 'em.

ToDoodles · 13/06/2011 16:43

I have told her to rent somewhere cheaper and stay there but she says she likes the space Grin
She doesn't seem to care about her credit rating etc.
They're all private lettings so no agency, no checks and gets references from her work, or says a sob story about her previous landlord so they don't ask.

Glad I'm not Being too U.
I nearly cried when they said 'You just carry on with what your doing then' As if i just hang around shopping or something! Angry

OP posts:
MindyMacready · 13/06/2011 16:49

YANBU, let the other branch of your family take the strain this time!

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