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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want to travel to my best friend's wedding in Colombia with my DS and DD

47 replies

Lozza23 · 12/06/2011 20:41

My best friend is getting married in Colombia in January and I very much want to be there. However, the trip will require 8 flights in total and additional vaccinations (yellow fever being the minimum). My DS will be almost 3 and my DD will be 10 months and leaving them behind is not an option. I have got the fear that I am expecting too much of my little ones to travel this distance for a wedding. AIBU to sack it off?

OP posts:
hiddenhome · 12/06/2011 22:01

I think you're doing the right thing.

I shall have nightmares tonight about going to Columbia Shock

(I watch Banged Up Abroad)

EmilyHallow · 12/06/2011 22:02

I'm sure your friend won't mind, anybody getting married out there has to realize that not everybody will be able to make that kind of journey. Maybe you could throw her a surprise party of your own in England?
I got married in the Caribbean, but it was a hard choice because I did want as many people as possible to be able to celebrate with us- that's why we had another party back home, when absolutely everybody came.
:)

elphabadefiesgravity · 12/06/2011 22:02

Colomia - no way. I wouldn't even go there without children for a wedding.

petaluma · 12/06/2011 22:04

Nish Nish Nish!

I'm getting quite anxious about it on your behalf!

MrsTittleMouse · 12/06/2011 22:06

Check this out.
www.fco.gov.uk/en/travel-and-living-abroad/travel-advice-by-country/south-america/colombia
Scary reading.

Doha · 12/06/2011 22:19

I certainly wouldn't consider going anywhere which involved my young DC's having yellow fever vaccination--in fact there may be others that the 10 month old would be too young to have. What about malaria tablets etc.

No don't take any chances with your DC's health. Don't go. i am sure your friend will understand. If she does not she won't be much of a friend

hiddenhome · 12/06/2011 22:20

After reading that website I wouldn't go there if I was paid Sad

I hope your friend will be safe.

hiddenhome · 12/06/2011 22:21

Dengue fever and malaria too.

Northernlurker · 12/06/2011 22:28

Good grief the FCO advice is scary.....child abduction, landmines, maleria - eeeeeeek!

hiddenhome · 12/06/2011 22:31

That's if the severe rains and volcanos don't get you first Shock

Northernlurker · 12/06/2011 22:33

and the driving - many accidents and don't drive at night.......

darleneoconnor · 12/06/2011 22:50

Why on Earth are they getting married there- it sounds like hell on Earth from that fco website. It would be totally reckless to take DCs there.

lalalonglegs · 12/06/2011 22:52

I have a friend who is Colombian. Her description of the country doesn't sound at all like the FCO's - I'd go and take my children (admittedly slightly older than OP's) if I could afford it.

Northernlurker · 12/06/2011 22:53

Presumably the bride or groom or both are from Colombia. Going by the FCO advice it's not some where you'd pick thinking 'oh that would be nice' unless it was your home country.

hellymelly · 12/06/2011 22:57

You are sensible not to go. I wouldn't risk it alone and I certainly wouldn't take very small children.Rape and kidnapping are endemic.My friend's daughter was raped there and was lucky to be alive.

A1980 · 12/06/2011 23:46

A trip to Colombia for a wedding is big ask as I doubt I could afford it. IMO if people choose to get married half way around the world they shoudl expect that many of their guests will not be able to go or they should pay for them to go.

Looking at the Foreign & Commonwealth Office advice I wouldn't go without children. .

It sounds like a mess!

Mumwithadragontattoo · 12/06/2011 23:47

Am glad you've decided not to go. My husband goes occasionally to Colombia for his work and it's a scary place. Not somewhere to take young kids.

A1980 · 12/06/2011 23:47

SORRY someones already posted it. Smacks head!

Cutiecat · 13/06/2011 00:17

Well I went to my brother and sister in laws wedding in Cartagena, Colombia when DS was 3 and DD was 11 months. It was totally fine. My sister in law is from Bogota but they live here. It was a once in a lifetime chance to go, we flew London - Miami, Miami - Cartegna. We didn't innoculate DD as she was still being breastfed and the doctor said would have the antibodies from me.

Obviously there are some dangerous places in Colombia but there are dangerous places everywhere. You have to use your common sense.

It is totally your choice and it seems you have already made up your mind. It was a harder choice for me as it was my brother and I am not sure I would have paid the cost of it to go to a friends wedding.

But do not be put off going away to exciting places with your children.

xstitch · 13/06/2011 00:53

Why Columbia? Is she or her fiance Columbian?

ll31 · 13/06/2011 01:13

I wouldnt' go, children too small if it was four yrs time, maybe but not now

ciaobellaxx · 13/06/2011 05:07

Firstly, I really hate to be pedantic, but to all the previous posters who spell it wrong - it's ColOmbia.

I agree it's probably a pain in the arse and expensive to travel for an overseas wedding with kids, so you aren't being unreasonable on those grounds.

However, all the talk of Colombia being wildly dangerous seems overkill. The bride and groom are probably from there, and would no doubt want to avoid bringing people over to one of the conflictive parts. As someone who HAS travelled in Colombia, there are many parts that are very touristy and would be a lovely place for a wedding - or holiday. If you are prefer a more boring, play-it-safe or bland destination, of course Colombia is the wrong place for you. But it can be a great place for someone into vibrant cultures, dancing, beautiful scenery and ridiculously welcoming people.

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