A brief bit of background:
I work for the longest-established and leading player in my industry. It is a job which many people think they want. Until, that is, they actually get it. Then they slowly come to see what a horrible environment it really is. Because they know they are at the top, the company feel that they can treat their staff like utter *$%@ and everyone will still bow down to them. Some particularly nasty things have happened recently with various people being made promises which were not delivered. Morale is just dreadful and people are resigning left, right and centre. A woman who was promoted to management earlier this year mysteriously disappeared practically overnight and there are all kinds of rumours flying around about what happened to her.
I applied for another job with a relatively small newcomer to the industry who seemed great and were thrilled to have found somebody with my experience. It would have involved a pay-cut but I would have gladly taken it for this company. Trouble is, four others from my present company also applied and I have just found out that I've lost out to my best friend there (which of course is great news for her as she really wanted it also).
I spent yesterday evening scouring job ads and there are no other comparable opportunities around at the moment. It's all either very part-time stuff or would involve a huge demotion. I'm suddenly feeling terribly down and physically sick at the thought of having to continue to go to work everyday at my current organisation for what is likely to be months yet. People tell me I have lost my spark and I am worried about the effect this could have on my poor children.
A good friend suggested yesterday evening that I should do a maths PGCE. She works at our nearest university and is pretty certain I could still get a place for September. Despite the significantly lower pay, it is true that I would be very well-qualified for this and it does have many advantages, like that I could spend summers with my children. I am suddenly very, very tempted. Yet, it's not something I ever imagined myself doing and would very much a spur of the moment decision. I've not even been thinking about it for 24 hours yet. However, if I'm going to do this, I need to get on with it.... like right now! My friend says I should get an application in this week to be in with a serious chance.
What to do? What to do? What to do? Oh help, I feel so stuck! Big decisions like this should never be made on the spur of the moment, right? I am just so worried that whatever I choose to do will end up being the wrong decision and that I'll suddenly wake up too late and think, 'What the hell have I done?!!!'