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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want to bathe surrounded by the odour of shit?

53 replies

MalkieFraser · 09/06/2011 20:39

I'm 39 weeks pregnant, have had a rather crap day and was looking forward to my long steamy bath after wrestling the toddler to bed. "Enjoy your bath" were my husbands parting words as I swanned off with my book for my evening wallow. His next words, fifteen minutes later were "I'm touching cloth." Now I'd suggested he go to the toilet before I had my bath, in the same knowing way I suggest it to my three year old before we leave the house, and he assured me he was fine. "you can pull the shower curtain closed" he said helpfully as I pulled out the plug. "don't go in a huff, you can get back in when I'm finished." Yeah right!!! Even my half bottle of clary fucking sage isn't enough to mask that reek. So now I'm allegedly petty and spiting myself, but seriously - the relaxing smell is broken. Am I expected to go back in, top up with hot water and try to ignore the fug of my husbands shite???

OP posts:
thisisyesterday · 09/06/2011 21:31

really? when you suddenly need to go you can't wait?

if you're driving along the motorway do you shit yourself???

Confused
kaluki · 09/06/2011 21:32

My exH used to do this every morning while I was in the shower.
He also used to sit on the loo and do a dump while his bath was running and then sit in the hot steamy bathroom in the warm stench of his own poo.
When he opened the door, the whole house would smell of it.
Which is one of the reasons he is now an ex husband.

BertieBotts · 09/06/2011 21:34

If you have one bathroom, the following are essential rules.

  1. Anyone about to run a bath must warn other family members if they need a poo they must do it NOW.
  1. If you didn't take your chance when someone asked then you have to wait. Tough shit (and yeah that was meant to be a pun Wink)
GreenEyesandHam · 09/06/2011 21:35

Oh your OP made me laugh Grin

Especially the clary sage reference, I'd forgotten about that stuff. When I say forgotten, I mean wiped it from my memory banks ugh.

LordOfTheFlies · 09/06/2011 22:27

DS (11yo) did this to me while I was in the bath-pulled the curtain across for decency.
He calls it 'Doing a Father Stone. (Father Ted episode with visiting priest)
Even worse he didn't flush and cackled like a maniac.
We also have a perfectly good downstairs loo! (Note to self-locks would be good)

No court in this land would convict me!

maybells · 09/06/2011 22:36

eurgh poor you my oh says touching cloth as well and his stench has still been in the bathroom after an hour the filth bag!!!!!!!!!! lock the door and tell him to piss off next time.

maighdlin · 09/06/2011 22:41

we only have one toilet and its separate from the rest of the bathroom and i am glad of it for exactly this reason!!

silent treatment for a while definitely. bastard.

Limara · 09/06/2011 22:54

'touching cloth/tortoise head' euwww Grin

StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 09/06/2011 22:55

Dh used to get a bit irritable with me for asking him to close the door of the en suite if he went in there to do a poo or a wee whilst I was in bed. Leaving the door open made me feel like he was shitting in the bedroom - urghhhhhhh!

DrNortherner · 09/06/2011 23:00

I amazed at those of you who can hold on to poo. When I need to poo I need to poo. I can't wait whilst someone relaxes in a hot bath.......my body seems to know when I am at home though as I never get the urgency anywhere else....

lOVE the touching cloth phrase, one of dh's faves too...Grin

TakeMeDrunkImHome · 09/06/2011 23:11

Laughing so much am scared i'm going to wake my daughter! My exH used to say "i've got a turtles head poking" all the time. Grin Sorry but it still makes me laugh!

PigletJohn · 09/06/2011 23:25

slightly off topic, do you need a more powerful extractor fan? Or do you just need to turn it on more often?

(if you have a bathroom with no extractor then you are causing unnecessary condensation, damp and mould)

kaluki · 10/06/2011 11:26

Who ever thought it was a good idea to have the toilet in the same room as the bath anyway?
In the olden days they were always separate and thats the way it should be imo.

M0naLisa · 10/06/2011 11:34

My ds1 always needs a poo when I'm in the bathh dh though is the same time everyday so I know when to get in the bath lol

RockinSockBunnies · 10/06/2011 11:40

Ewwww.

But seriously, are there people who have this pooing 'urgency'? Needing a wee desparately is one thing, but people can hold on for a poo for hours if necessary, can't they? I know of people who hate having a poo anywhere unfamiliar and hold on for days....Surely, poo being a lot more solid than wee, can be held on to if necessary?

Glad this thread has come along as DP insists he has to go as soon as he gets the urge, which I have never understood.

Bleugh.

JetLi · 10/06/2011 11:42

I once heard it referred to "Holding back a turd big enough to choke a donkey"

Give me a stick to poke out my minds eye....

ashamedandconfused · 10/06/2011 11:46

RockinSockBunnies - some people may have a medical condition, or undiagnosed food intolerances etc which result in an urgency to go - IBS, coeliac disease, dairy intolerance . You can even get printed cards to explain your urgent need to queue jump in public loos. You have to not care about being heard to explode your rear-end into the pan, none of this holding till you get home!

holding it in deliberately for days is not a good idea, you can get terribly constipated

RockinSockBunnies · 10/06/2011 11:48

Of course, medical conditions could cause that. But other than that, in general, people can hold back if necessary?

GooGooMuck · 10/06/2011 11:49

I've heard it's PCK.... partially collapsed knipper.

You can't hold it when you suffer with PCK.

saffy85 · 10/06/2011 11:53

Ewww YASoNBU! Could have written the OP myself infact.

MrsBethel · 10/06/2011 12:00

YANBU

I'd hand him a potty and tell him to piss off.

NeopreneMermaid · 10/06/2011 12:16

YANBU. However, there are times when one just can't hold on but there's usually an alternative: my SIL was at the house of her new boyfriend (now husband of three years) and was DESPARATE but his housemate was in the only bathroom and her bf had already left the house... so she did a poo in a plastic bag. And left it in the kitchen bin.

Would that be any better?

razzlebathbone · 10/06/2011 13:40

Next time tell him to do it in his sock if he can't wait.

shuffleballchange · 10/06/2011 13:44

DH works on building sites and before the days of there being loos available to them, they used to have to put a bag in a bucket and go on that, maybe he could go in the garden next time and try that?

Bluemoonrising · 10/06/2011 13:48

My ex used to take a desperately long time in the bathroom, and would hurry for no-one.

One day I was desperate so I pooed on (note 'on' - not 'in') on of my DS's nappies, and folded it up as normal and put it in with his nappies. I figured that no-one would notice, really, as they are expected to be pongy!

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