to love a bit of argy bargy - breastfeeding or linen trousers

[PharoahNuff]

i dont mind. i LOVE it

...and when we got out of our massive 4x4, I put my large 4 yr old in a buggy and popped his dummy in his mouth. So ner ner ner.

4x4 parked in the mum and baby space even though your kids are 13 & 15.

Obviously

monica you WUSS
go and eat a turkey twixler

Lemory don't forget that wasn't just your dc without seatbelts in there. You had at least two other dhildren in there too seatbeltless.

can't am a high-horsed veggie

OH HO MONICA

add to that " i wnt to a mates adn they didnt cook me veggie, but i didnt tell them"

ososm

Breastfeeding seven year olds
Linen trews
macdonalds
holiday in term time
married lover
use of disabled facility
Greggs
Disney
Tax credits
and
Incontinent staffordshire bull terrier
While researching for the Wright Stuff
In a 4X4 with bull bars
and complaining you got a speeding ticket for going 60 down a straight country road past a school.

All of the above. Plus, the puppy I bought from the puppy farm. It wears clothes.

And we only eat MaccyDs, Greggs or ready meals. Unless it's Sunday. Then we have KFC. Cos it's chicken innit.

and I smoke.........

AIBU? to wear linen trousers to my wedding, ask my guests to contribute significant cash towards our (term time) honeymoon in lieu of a pressie, and ban any children except my own? I have engaged a lawyer to draw up a contract (a pre-bub) detailing exactly what my MIL may say to, feed and buy for my child, and explained to FIL that though he may well have lost both legs, his sight and the lower two thirds of his intestine, we will NOT be using his Blue Badge in a disabled parking space unless the trip is solely for his benefit. So, when we take my bubba to the zoo he will have to crawl and feel his way from the Parent and Toddler spaces in the car park to the picnic area (to eat 3 lean slices of organic grouse and a rice cake) or else stay in the car.

brill

AND...he may have lost both legs and never walk on the ground, but that doesn't mean I don't expect him to remove his shoes when he comes in through our front door!

Don't forget pubes-wars...!

I see youse lot and raise you

A poorly fitting bra with norkish overspill, a visible lace thong and poorly moisturised feet in sandles with my see-through linen trews and per una waterfall cardi.

In the back of my 4x4 is a pedigree cat who poos in other people's gardens.

And, I have a "powered by fairy dust" sticker in my rear window.

The pedantic ones will of noticed some deliberate spelling & grammatical errors

What about the obese smoking East European outside the jobcentre bottle feeding while waiting for her benefit cheating partner wearing crocs and a dog that isn't on a lead.

Is that the one that has 10 children, is heavily pregnant and sells the Beeg Ishoo outside Waitrose whilst smoking knock off fags?

Is she related to the woman who lives in a free million pound council house and has her babies ears pierced ?

antidote is on A level here

Lemony you made me smile! Quite a feat today as I have a stinking cold, and am horribly miserable and cross! You mention trews too, I thought my mother was the only person left alive who mentions TREWS!
(She still wears a Roll-on too, under her trews - I'm just whispering that to you as she thinks it rude to mention underwear in public.)

For Lemony read Lemory. Its the cold!

but has anyone else got three quarter length linen trousers on ?

I wore them to take my children to soft play-most of their chicken pox spots have blistered now and we're bored staying in

Would I be unreasonable to wean my 23 week old onto Greggs sausage rolls and fruitshoots eaten in McDonalds while wearing a really chavvy mini-skirt and cleavage bearing top so that I can whip my boobs out to breastfeeding as well. Obviously I will be making sure to spray and drip all over the place.

Would I then be unreasonable to park in a disabled place at the shop as all the P and C spaces are used up? Also, I don't want anyone parking near my chavved up track car (yes, I do actually own a sweet kitted Mitsubishi for track day racing) so I will be parking over 3 spaces, diagonally.

I think I have a bird stuck in my chimney

I can hear its fat thighs chafing togther

I'm going to fall pregnant accidentally on purpose to fix my failing marriage, it'll be great, I won't tell DH