To hope that none of my DCs ever…

[MinnieBar]

? go on a reality show, thus forcing me to wear a t-shirt with a picture of them and 'VOTE FOR ' emblazoned across the front, simultaneously waving a home-made banner and whooping?

I do not look good in crew necks.

Gah, that first question mark was meant to be an ellipsis?

You need to start putting really embarressing photos to one side now, the ones the production company will ask for if your DCs get to the final and the producers need photos of their childhood to illustrate their "journey".

Am debating bathing DS in the sink rather than the bath just so I can take a photo for such occassions - child in sink bath = tv short hand for deserving poor...

I don't have any pics of that, nor of them performing in some way at a precocious age. Although there's still time for the youngest two?

FPT - we recently took a pic of 3mo DS in the bath which has been immediately identified as the one which will be going on the fridge the day he brings his first girlfriend/boyfriend home... 'And this is the first time darling DS managed to grasp his willy'

Marries royalty or significan VIP thus demanding that I as mother-of-the-bride have to diet to a size 8 and never have a bad hair day/dress down.

...becomes a Tory or a drug addict. Other than that, as lond as they're happy

Ends up an absolute arsehole.

I know a family who have three sons who have all been in prison for horrid things. Their parents are lovely and have done their absolute best for them. It terrifies me that you can be a good parent and do your absolute best and your progeny still end up doing horrible things.

I also hope my ds never smokes. Hate smoking. My mum smoked and our house stank of it - everything was so saturated, my teachers used to think I smoked. Yuk.

eats meat. They probably will though, and that's up to them, and I would never voice this thought out loud in RL, but secretly, I hope they choose not to when they are old enough to think about it.

Alas - by the time our DC are all grown - reality shows may well be the ONLY thing on TV..

Wow, some of you have gone all serious?

I also hope none of mine become tennis champions (so I don't have to spend all day at Wimbledon shouting like Andy Murray's mum) or football/rugby players so I don't have to spend ages freezing my arse off on pitches [selfish sport-hating emoticon].