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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that everyone judges people, they must do! Surely I'm not alone.

32 replies

mummyloveslucy · 28/05/2011 21:49

I was at the zoo today with my 6 year old daughter and we stopped to have our picnic. This family came over and sat on another table, I could hear the mother shouting and swearing at the kids before I saw her. They had 4 children who were running about trying to either kick or pull a feather of a Pecock. Both parents were smoking, wearing leasure gear and just looked angry. Even when the mum was saying something nice it was still in a deep angry tone. She actually made my DD jump several times as she screamed at her children to sit down or something.
Now I'm not saying I'm a perfect parent or anything, I do find it very hard indead and I only have one, although she does have SEN's. But what a disfunctional family! They were truly awful! I don't think that anyone who met them could possibly think otherwise.
It got me thinking about judging people and I know that on MN people are very against judging but I don't think you can help it, I know I can't. AIBU to think that everyone must do it, or am I just a total judgy bitch? Wink

I just know someone will say they judge me by my spelling, so I thought I'd get there fist. Grin

OP posts:
Rannaldini · 28/05/2011 21:51

Peacocks are without merit

NotYourPrincess · 28/05/2011 21:52
millie30 · 28/05/2011 21:54

But they obviously care enough about their children to have taken them for a nice day out and picnic, so they can't be all bad.

Original poster
mummyloveslucy · 28/05/2011 21:54

Me too. Grin

OP posts:
Lavitabellissima · 28/05/2011 21:55

"I know that on MN people are very against judging" Grin

Really? isn't MN called Judgypantsnet Bear

Original poster
mummyloveslucy · 28/05/2011 21:55

That is true. Smile

OP posts:
lesley33 · 28/05/2011 21:56

Of course everyone judges,but some do more quickly than others.

Although I am always surprised at people saying a poster shouldn't judge, when they are posting in AIBU? AIBU invites people to judge.

lesley33 · 28/05/2011 21:57

And sometimes it is right to judge. Would people really not judge if they saw a young child being whacked angrily by a parent?

AgentZigzag · 28/05/2011 21:59

Of course everyone judges, but what's important is the framework you do your judging with.

MN can show you viewpoints you'd not thought of before, so instead of a knee jerk judgement of the parent of what I used to think was a DC who was far too old to be in a pushchair, I'd now think of the reasons why they might be in it.

Breathe princess Breathe! You're turning blue Grin

MonstaMunch · 28/05/2011 22:01

yes i judge, i love it

from the chavvy mum who needs the mobile phone surgically removed from her ear so she can light her fag to the daft ineffectual "dont do that arabella, mummy gets upset" mother in Waitrose, with her awful spoilt brats

love it

MadamDeathstare · 28/05/2011 22:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
mummyloveslucy · 28/05/2011 22:03

That is true, I don't feel so badly about judging now. I like to think of myself as a nice person but I do judge all the time. I can't help myself! Blush

I suppose it made me a bit cross that they came over swearing and smoking and made my dd jump. I'm far too much of a coward to say anything and I know if we moved, my dd would blurt out "why are we going" in a nice loud voice, then I'd feel Blush

OP posts:
Sqee · 28/05/2011 22:04

I JUDGE YOU ALL!

ilovesooty · 28/05/2011 22:06

MadamDeathstare I think that's the most profound post I've ever seen.

AgentZigzag · 28/05/2011 22:07

Yes, definately agree with compassion MadamD.

It's just not easy to summon any up when you're in a right arse and stamping round Tesco Grin

Sqee · 28/05/2011 22:09

I should be judged. Harshly.

I found a cornflake in my cleavage earlier......and ate it. Blush

AgentZigzag · 28/05/2011 22:09
Original poster
mummyloveslucy · 28/05/2011 22:09

In a way I felt sorry for the mum and the children. The mum was so stressed she couldn't relax and enjoy her day, and it couldn't be a happy home life for the children either.

OP posts:
ShellyBoobs · 28/05/2011 22:10

I don't think YABU.

It's more of an observation you've made than a judgement IMO.

Hope your DD had a lovely day. :)

NotYourPrincess · 28/05/2011 22:12

AIBU has been quite calm this evening, I was sure this was going to crash and burn.

Obviously, I mis-judged...

Sqee · 28/05/2011 22:13
Original poster
mummyloveslucy · 28/05/2011 22:13

Sqee- That's so funny, I won't judge you for that. I do things like that. Maybe I'm in no position to judge others. Grin

OP posts:
pinkyredrose · 28/05/2011 22:13

pull those judgy pants up high, you'll need them!

Sqee · 28/05/2011 22:15

Hrmm I wouldn't speak too soon. I haven't had cornflakes since Wednesday.

AgentZigzag · 28/05/2011 22:18

Nobody can be arsed to get themselves in a lather princess, actually, now you've mentioned it, AIBU is a bit watered down with niceness tonight, you don't think...Shock