To rethink my parenting strategy based on a reality tv programme?

[lesley33]

The title is a bit tongue in cheek as my 4 children are grown up. But I always used to subscribe to the theory of choosing your battles - especially with teens. But watching many episodes of "The World's Strictest Parents" has genuinely made me question this.

The teenagers are always out of control - usually with drugs and/or drink involved. The teenagers go abroad to stay with a family who always enforce extremely harsh rules e.g. no piercings including earrings, modest dress, etc.

There is always lots of battles with the new "parents" refusing to pick their battles and instead challenging everything they think the teen is doing wrong. By the end of the week the teen is behaving well and goes back home a changed person.

Now I know it is reality tv so probably not presented in a strictly true to life way, but it has honestly made me question whether the "pick your battles" theory is wrong and in fact a get out clause for lazy/stressed parents?

I'm very suspicious of TV shows that claim to be true to life. Logic dictates that if there's not wall-to-wall confrontation it's going to be a pretty dull show. And I expect that the out of control teens are poked regularly to make sure they're nicely naughty for the cameras. I'm sure some families go for 'zero tolerance' in real life but I can't honestly believe anyone lives in such a constant state of indignation! Must be exhausting.....

I saw the one with the two gay dads who I agree seem to genuinely get a handle on the problems. And they ask the girl and her mother if she can stay for another couple of weeks so they can help her more! Maybe IBU to question things based on a stage managed reality programme?

YABU The real children of those strict parents seem beaten down and unhappy.

I don't predict their children will morph into happy confident adults with a great (to them) career or life.

I predict they'll morph into their parents. Be bored with jobs they don't enjoy and dominate their children.

I'm okay when parents are strict [boundaries are good], but not when it's based on religious beliefs, which is what was involved in the few episodes that I saw.
I agree though, I would take any reality TV show with a massive pinch of salt.

The worlds strictest parents seemed contrived to me. I suppose many such programmes are... My wife has a naughty step for me. (good fun)