in thinking that most children diagnosed with ADHD actually DO have ADHD?

[DillyDaydreaming]

Probably a crap title but an idea of the frustration I sometimes feel when being treated to the various comments of society and people about ADHD.

"It's an excuse for bad behaviour"
"It's to get a label and claim benefits"
"ADHD doesn't exist"
"He doesn't need medication because he sits so nicely in class"
"He isn't ADHD"
"ADHD is an excuse for bad parents"

etc etc etc

Since DS was diagnosed with ADHD I have heard all the above and more. Tbh it gets a bit wearing after a while, all these people with not a single medical degree in the appropriate subject among them, opinionating about the existence or not of ADHD. Among doctors without child development training there is also a tendancy to dismiss it. I tend to think there that they just are not experienced enough - like getting the opinion of a diabetes specialist about a brain tumour.

I am not suggesting all children diagnosed with ADHD have fantastic parenting - some don't but their problems exist with poor parenting or with good. If they happen to live with poor parenting then their ADHD will not fare as well as a child with ADHD who is more fortunate.

Equally I am sure there are children who fit the criteria for ADHD simply because the parenting IS poor and many with the same poor parenting who do not.

My son has ADHD, he is not "climbing the walls", he sits nicely in school with support of a one to one assistant who was allocated because he is also autistic, dyspraxic and has hypermobile joints. He fidgets, taps his legs and flaps his hands at times (self stimulation) and until two months ago struggled to read. Since starting on medication he can now read at the age of 8.5yrs and it's fantastic to see him and the joy he experiences from being able to decode the words on the page successfully. I have always read to him and he loves having a story - its fabulous to see him being able to read simple stories to himself finally. The sense of achievement this gives him is immense and makes me feel better about allowing a trial of medication which I was anxious about.

My son is not neurotypical and his brain is wired differently to other children. he knows he has ADHD, he understands this makes it harder to concentrate and he also knows that ADHD is NOT an excuse for bad behaviour. Generally he is very good both in and out of the home and school. Equally if he is distressed by noises, crowds or sights and sounds (supermarkets and my hate with him) then he can be more erratic. As he gets older he will be able to function more easily as he develops effective coping strategies to help his impulse control. I filmed him in a supermarket once - just a short few moments as he walked up and down, spinning on occasions, talking to himself and flapping his hands. When I watch this I realise that I have adjusted to his differences - in fact I scarecely notice them. Other people DO notice though and comments can be varied from the knowing supportive ones to the downright nasty.

So I am really irritated by those who evidently have or had perfect children without the challenges my DS faces making comments about "ADHD doesn't exist".

And don't even get me started about some so called teachers on the TES forum. All I can say is I wouldn't want some of them within 100 miles of my son - he has enough difficulties already.

No diablo, I would agree that it doesn't always mean the diagnosis is right but in many, if not most cases it is. Medication is varied and it takes a bit of mucking about with it to get it right for each child. There are loads of different drugs on the market and it needs to be a joint commitment between parents and paediatrician to monitor it and make changes where needed. It might be that one drug does nothing for child A but works brilliantly for child B, however, if child A's parents decide to follow through with medication then a change of drug might make all the difference.

I have always known that medication did not mean a "magic pill" despite what the papers would have us believe. It's an aid and nothing more, my DS still needs guidance, structure, routine and boundaries to his day. There sadly ARE parents out there whose children (correct diagnosis or not) will never give that support to their child. And that is very sad

My DS (7) has ADHD dx at 3yrs medicated at 5yrs (very much the right decision for us). I also believe him to be ASD which is not officially diagnosed but I often wonder if his ADHD is just symptomatic of of being on the autistic spectrum.

At his last CAMHS appt the RMN said that they are moving towards thinking of ADHD as being under the 'spectrum umbrella', which makes a lot of sense to me. DS is not what you would consider typical Aspergers but he has a lot of the impairments, to the unseeing eye they are masked by the hyperactivity so he doesn't particularly appear introverted, have sensory problems etc...but they are there and contribute to a lot of the 'bad' behaviour.

I also wish people who criticise would just fuck off (it's a shame a lot of those are 'friends'). They should try living with it. Despite his difficulties DS is doing really well in school and life, evidence of our GOOD parenting under difficult circumstances according to CAMHS.

DillyDaydreaming It would be great to see the massive improvement / change in personality that happened to Child 1, happen to others (for staff, parents and child alike).

Unfortunately, I work in an area where we know (because they admit it) that some parents want the diagnosis simply to get the extra money available. I know that the MAJORITY of parents here are not like that, but it's a sad fact of where I work and I think this affects some people's opinion of whether ADHD is a "real" problem.

I know it is - I see the effects every day.

ADHD didn't exist back in my day.

No, nor did mobile phones. Are they fake too?

I have never understood the argument about people faking ADHD for benefits.

I'm sure a small proportion of people do but people also fake back problems and cancer to gain money but will still believe in those don't we!

I didn't want money (we are on no benefits in our house, unless you count free prescription for 10 year old). I wanted my child treated for his condition. And since he has been, he could well be child 1 in Diabolo's story. A child who went from a level 2 in Year 5, to a high level 4 in Y6. A child whose social difficulties vanished. And a child who no longer wakes us up at 2 am to discuss his latest thoughts on a matter.

Yes, I think my child has ADHD. And am cross that it took so long and was so very difficult to get a diagnosis.

So in my view, OP YANBU.

As a teacher I have seen the amazing effect a correct diagnosis and treatment can have for a child with ADHD. We had one lad who was such a classic case and once his diet and medication had been sorted was like a different child.

Soon put those who doubted the condition in their place I can tell you!

Within days of starting Ritalin I had my first ever conversation with my son. It was amazing.

Several years down the line - and I recently sent him into school one day without taking his tablets (I had run out and needed to get some more from the chemist, who was waiting for a delivery). By 9:10 I had had a phone call from the school asking me to come and collect him as they wouldn't have him in school without his meds. Apparently it hadn't taken long to notice the difference.

I agree with kungfu the ones who are actually properly diagnosed by a professional do have ADHD. Some parents however claim their child has it in an attempt to excuse bad behaviour yet that child has never even been assessed by anyone trained. It is these parents who give the condition a bad name. Please not I did say some. Other parents are just fighting for a well deserved assessment. The former I doubt would want that as it would show up their fabrication.

The response is: "Thanks for your comment. Did you know that hyperactivity was first described in 1902, which is interesting seeing as autism was first described in 1944, and most people are quite content that this exists"

Wish I could "like" your comment, carve133.

You're welcome. I've got another: "Did you also know that its been the most researched childhood psychiatric condition for the past few decades, which is lots of academics spending lots of time on something that doesn't exist".

Of course there are lots of kids with complex social problems (as other posters like kungfu have mentioned) that probably underlie some of the comments OP, but your DS most certainly doesn't sound like one of these.

I don't think its that people don't believe in ADHD, its more that some people myself included don't see it as an issue. I had teachers bring up ADD when I was in school to get my parents to have me diagnosed.My parents never did, probably out of laziness, but honestly how would labeling me that have changed things?

I think the world feels the need to label children and confine them to a certain model. I understand this is due to us needing to teach children and maybe (being cynical here) financially it makes sense to get all children to conform to learning in one way. But we don't all learn in one way.

My grandfather if he were young today would likely be diagnosed as having asbergers. He is a techincal minded hyper intelligint man, with no personal skills. Seriously, he just doesn't know how to deal with people. But he has a very good job and everyone has just learned that is his personality and not to be offended when he doesn't notice you've been talking to him for hours. If he were a child today I wonder if him being labeled would affect who could grow up to be? Would he feel he were "disabled" in some way?

Through history most of our artists and geniuses were just thought to be eccentric, I worry that people labeling children as being diabled will stop some of the future generations from achieving their potential.

Wouldn't it be best if children had access in schools to tailored learning for thier way of thinking with out labeling them as being one thing or another? Which would make sense because again not all syndromes manifest themselves with the exact same symptoms so you are getting children to conform to their label.

I would like parents to have the access to help to deal best with their child not their insert label here.

Hope this hasn't offended anyone, it really isn't meant that way