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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be a little bit smug that my DS threw up in his friends Dad's car which was being driven at 100mph!

54 replies

Wormshuffler · 23/05/2011 19:40

My DS was invited to a party at the weekend, the cinema followed by food.
When he was dropped off there was a frantic knock at the door............He had thrown up all over the car. I was mortified and went out there with my bucket and spent half an hour cleaning the car up as any resposible parent would. The friends Dad also got stuck in and cleaned up to, which I have got to say I was impressed with.

I worried about it all afternoon and in the evening went round with a really expensive bottle of wine, loads of frebreeze and tubs of bicarb for the smell, offering to give it another clean if it still stank in the morning.

I have since found out that DS and his friends were being driven at speeds of 100mph Shock I am furious that someone would drive so irresponsibly with not just their own children in the car but other people's too! and now feel really glad that DS did indeed throw up all over the car!!

Would I be unreasonable to never let DS go in this persons car again?

OP posts:
Original poster
Wormshuffler · 23/05/2011 20:47

Why are you picking fault with what a 9 year old said? ok then, "he was driving like a twat then reached nearly 100mph"

OP posts:
HerBeX · 23/05/2011 21:06

I'd be fucking incandescent actually.

I wouldn't have my child's life put at risk just to keep on good terms with some irresponsible nob.

Original poster
Wormshuffler · 23/05/2011 21:11

I havnt put my childs life at risk Shock now that I know how he drives i will never let him go in the car with him again!!!! but I wont be screaming and shouting now that no harm was done, but will be advising other parents about what happened.

OP posts:
Glitterandglue · 23/05/2011 21:17

Just to make a note - 62mph is 100kmh. So he might have seen the speedo on 100, but actually it was indicating speed in kph. Just a thought!

Original poster
Wormshuffler · 23/05/2011 21:18

Ha how many merc drivers do you know that would drive 62mph on a deserted a1?

OP posts:
Glitterandglue · 23/05/2011 21:28

Do you know, I haven't actually gone round asking the people I know who own Mercedes how fast they drive on deserted roads.

However, all the people I know who speed in whatever car they may own, and who I've been with while they drive with children, slow down when they have children in the car.

If you know for a fact he's a bad driver then it was a bad decision on your part to let your child travel with him. If you don't then you're simply stereotyping, and yeah, based on what your DS has said, but all I did was point out that there was definitely a possibility that he might have read it wrong.

Original poster
Wormshuffler · 23/05/2011 21:32

Did you skip the part where I said I thought the Mum would be taking them?
Only on mumsnet could a light hearted vomit thread be turned around to be down to my bad-parenting..........

OP posts:
Glitterandglue · 23/05/2011 21:34

Yep, I did miss that. My apologies.

HerBeX · 23/05/2011 21:37

Sorry wormshuffler, I wasn't saying you'd put your child's life at risk, didn't mean it to come over like that. I meant that if you continue to let the guy drive your kid, then you would be.

The problem with letting his wife drive, is that she won't necessarily tell you if she changes her mind and lets her husband drive. Unless you tell her v. clearly that you're not happy for him to drive your kids and could she please make sure he never does.

Not really sure how you can say that to anyone without major diplomatic fall out though.

Good point about Kilometres per Hour. Why don't you just straight out ask him? You could phrase it as: "DS said you were driving at 100, obviously of course you're not such an irresponsible nob that you would do such a thing, is the speed gauge in Kilometres in your car then?"

skybluepearl · 23/05/2011 21:44

i think you need to test the water - joke with the wife that DS said hubby was driving at 100 miles oper hour and see what the response is? i wouldn't let the wife or hubby take you son anywhere in the future.

Goblinchild · 23/05/2011 21:48

Why are you smug?
You were mortified,did the cleaning, gave them wine and offered to clean it again if it still stank in the morning.
Sucker.

Original poster
Wormshuffler · 23/05/2011 22:05

I'm only smug now that I have found out he was driving like a twat. I was totally mortified at the time and felt really sorry for DS throwing up in front of his mates!!
Now I know the truth I have no intention of asking if it is all smelling fresh!

DS won't be going in the car with them again, in fact I am thinking twice about letting him go in anyones car ever again!!

OP posts:
zipzap · 23/05/2011 23:22

You could make a point 'joke' about how how your ds only vomits when going at serious speed or how amount of vomit correlates with speed he was being driven... Maybe a way to broach it without going in all guns blazing and still getting point across.

Or as a reminder if they ever have to drive your ds again. Guessing that threat of vomit across precious car might be more effective deterrent to dangerous driver dad than speed cameras.

differentnameforthis · 24/05/2011 04:26

Ha how many merc drivers do you know that would drive 62mph on a deserted a1?

So merc drivers can't be careful & speed abiding! Huge assumption!

differentnameforthis · 24/05/2011 04:30

I'm only smug now that I have found out he was driving like a twat

You haven't found out he was driving like a twat, you are assuming, because your ds said that he was.

I'd be asking the parent, not relying on a 9yr old!

Original poster
Wormshuffler · 24/05/2011 06:48

Where did I say DS only vomits at serious speeds?
Where am I all guns blazing?
Differentnameforthis I asked the question how many do you know? Where is the assumption? I havn't assumed he was driving like a twat, I have seen it with my own eyes on previous occasions and My DS told Me how he was driving. Why would he lie?

I'm hiding the thread now, AIBU is very apt-ly named, as most of the posters who reply really are very unreasonable!

OP posts:
Goblinchild · 24/05/2011 06:51

'I havn't assumed he was driving like a twat, I have seen it with my own eyes on previous occasions'
Yet you still let your son travel in the car, and don't want to say anything to the man in question. Or, presumably give an honest answer next time he offers a lift.

Original poster
Wormshuffler · 24/05/2011 06:54

Like I have said now 3 times..............the Mum was supposed to be driving............

OP posts:
twooter · 24/05/2011 07:02

Yanbu, and I would mention it to your friend

silverfrog · 24/05/2011 07:03

So at 10am on a Saturday morning, your ds and friends had already been to the cinema and for food, and the a1 was deserted?

Sounding less and less likely, tbh.

Original poster
Wormshuffler · 24/05/2011 07:18

It was the return journey the film started at 1035, why on earth would I lie about it?

OP posts:
Original poster
Wormshuffler · 24/05/2011 07:21

Will I ever learn not to post in AIBU...........

OP posts:
silverfrog · 24/05/2011 07:26

So your ds threw up on the way to the cinema?

It just doesn't seem to hang together, really. There are posts where you seem to imply you knew the dad was driving, yet let your ds go anyway. Posts which suggest your ds threw up due to the speed, but now surely you are saying he threw up on the way back?

Original poster
Wormshuffler · 24/05/2011 07:35

No they went to the cinema, I dropped him off around the friends house at 10am. They then drove to the cinema, watched the film, ate pizza and sweets. Then on the way home DS threw up. Subsequent conversations have revealed the manor of driving and speed. I have never implied I knew he was driving.
If you think you have successfully hunted a troll, you are very much mistaken.

OP posts:
LiliesandVeuve · 24/05/2011 07:53

Bloody hell
of course you can do 100mph and a nine year old is plenty capable of thinking "ooh were going fast, let's look and see how fast"

op, just ignore

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