To expect my 6 year old to be responsible for keeping his room tidy?

[Likeaninjanow]

DS1 is 6 years old, and thinks he is to young to have to do this. He also says none of his friends have to do this .

So, AIBU?

no

He is too young to be solely responsible but he should be helping o make his bed, put clothes in the laundry bin etc

My DS is nealy 5 and he does this with my encouragement

Of course he should and I bet his friends do too. Tell him you're not falling for that old chestnut

If he makes it into a bombsite beyond the norm, then he should be responsible for tidying his toys away.

4 year old DS makes bed and tidies toys/books onto shelves

I only have to ask once!!

I don't think 6 is too old, but the tasks of what he has to do to get it tidy might need breaking down and spelling out.

Little and often.

Tidying up his bed, dirty clothes in the laundry basket and picking up toys at the end of the day are what mine would do at that age.

I went up there earlier and it looked like an actual tip. There was even rubbish lying about! He had a friend in earlier, so they must've destroyed the room between them.

I was angry, but began to wonder if it was too much to ask. So far, it seems not.

PLEASE, carry on and make him. My mum never did til I learned to be lazy and think everyone else just should do it for me. It has been hard HARD work retraining myself to be tidy. Siblings are the same. What a crap spoilt child I was!!

I should explain - I don't ask him to dust or run round with the Hoover! I just ask that he tidies away his toys and puts dirty clothes in the laundry.

I think if it's a tip he might need help sorting it out to start with, and then be responsible for it afterwards.

It's amazing how little time they can turn it upside down when a friend's over.

Definitely not too young. My 6 year old and 3 year old share a room and they are jointly responsible for keeping it tidy - that includes beds made and PJs away before school, everything tidied away before bed at night and all clothes in the wash basket - separated into dark and lights. Admittedly they rarely play in their room, but they are also expected to tidy up the playroom/living room at the end of each day. I don't have to remind them - it's just a normal part of their day.

Phew! That's good to hear. I was beginning to doubt myself. I'll battle on

Just wondering, how do you handle it when they have friends over? Who tidies it then?

Friends help before they leave, just as my kids would be expected to help clear up their mess in someone else's house. Of course there are times when we do it together, or I run around a do a quick tidy while the kids are getting dressed or something, but I'm no-one's slave!

Thanks! That's pretty much what we do now, so good to know it's not unusual.

If the friend makes the mess and my DCs don't get them to tidy before they leave then it is their responsibility to tidy as it was their friend who made the mess not me and I'm not doing it. I find the threat of a bin bag works well in this house. All 4 of mine are responsible for their own rooms/areas have been since they were old enough to make the mess, DD4 makes her own bed and puts her own toys away and loves to dust (as long as she can use a whole can of polish in one room )

YANBU - the more they do the better - DD loves dusting and she's 18mo

I've got a 6 yr old and she has to tidy up her toys etc but it is hard work getting her to do it! And I frequently have a box of toys stashed on my wardrobe that I have taken because she hasn't picked them up when asked. And there are many, many tantrums - fortunately (or maybe not) I am as stubborn as she is so it generally gets done in the end.

They have to do it at school, so why should they be too young at home?

Mine does it when to room gets a bit too messy. He always moans, cries and tells me its all too much. When I help him then he just sits there and fiddles (waits for me to do it all). So I get him to do one thing at a time, e.g. Lego in box. When that's done, books on shelf ... its all work in progress.