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To think my friend could be a bit more interested?

7 replies

Mum2one2 · 18/05/2011 16:42

My best friend since school has 2 children, the oldest one who is 3 was the first baby out of all my friends. When be was born I was always there to help out and we went on loads of outings together and got on really well, she got pregnant with her second girl who is now six months. We still did loads together and I went and saw them all the time even at 9 months pregnant myself as it was easier for me to go there than them all come to me. Anyway when I had my baby they didn't come until she was 4 days old even though I went and saw both of hers within 24 hours. But her husband was off and they were busy. Anyway 4 months on and she's only held my baby once which was just after she was born. We still see eachother all the time and I always make sure to give both her children lots of attention and cuddles especially the older one as it must be bard all these babies all at once! Anyway I'm starting to get offended and the other day she was saying how funny it is my baby is so serious. She makes absoloutly no effort to try and get a smile. Grr got myself all angry now!

OP posts:

hobnobsaremyfavourite · 18/05/2011 16:44



BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 18/05/2011 16:49

YABU - she is YOUR friend, not your baby's. I have one DS but to be honest other peoples babies dont do it for me....I dont want to cuddle them, not cozI dont like them but I just dont want to!! Maybe your mate is the same....dont take it personally. As you said, you still see each other all the time so just be glad about that rather than counting how many times she has cuddled your baby!! Maybe you are just more of a baby person that she is.


MrsCarriePooter · 18/05/2011 16:53

What everyone else said. 4 days is still early and she has two small children now, it's simply not as easy as you popping round as a single unencumbered lady, no matter how pregnant.

Finally - my DS (youngest child) went through a stage of going ballistic if he saw me holding another baby.


ChickensHaveNoEyebrows · 18/05/2011 16:54

YABU. Some people just don't really get other people's children. I mean, I adore my own, but other people's are not really on my radar. It's lovely that you are so interested in her DC, but I don't think you should take it personally that she doesn't make a huge fuss of yours. Shes probably happy to spend time with you, so your baby doesn't get much attention. Anyway, your baby will get bigger and start demanding her attention before you know it Grin


Grabaspoon · 18/05/2011 17:00

I love my friends kids and do as you did - lots of attention going to visit early etc - however another good friend of mine couldn't care less about holding the baby etc as babies aren't her thing - however when the chips are down we know she cares for the children/babies. Different strokes for different folks


Bumfuzzle · 18/05/2011 17:55

If she's your best friend, why don't you just tell her how you feel? Whether it is 'reasonable' or 'unreasonable' - it's how you feel and if she's your best friend, you should be able to tell her how you feel, no matter if it is all emotional and unreasonable (not saying it is, just saying even if it is)

Maybe she's just not into other people's babies? If hers is 6mths old - could she have pnd? Could she be a bit distracted with her own? Does she think you don't want her to hold the baby? I mean, have you passed the baby to her or asked her if she wants a cuddle?

Thing is, you won't know what's going on unless you open your mouth and speak.


Pancakeflipper · 18/05/2011 18:00

She might have thought "I won't go round immediately, I'll give it several days so they can get settled cos' it's bloody annoying having lots of visitors 24hrs after giving birth."

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