To be annoyed by DH's male peacocking?

[carocaro]

He gets home from work and sort of does that peacocking thing? Like male posturing, like how tired he is and how busy he's been, several times. I acknowledge what he says, but how many times do I have to?

I get it, he works hard, I don't need all the endless running commentry.

He was home last night as I was dishing out children's dinner and whilst sitting on a stool he asked if I could make him a cup of tea! Too tired and worn out to make himself a tea while I was busy?

Do you get what I mean? What's it all about?

It's the human male equivalent of pissing in the corners. Ridiculous and best either laughed at or ignored.

carocaro - is there any chance he is literally exhausted from overwork, stressed or ill in some way?

Something like early stage diabetes, post viral syndrome or permanently working under heay stress makes people feel permanently tired and exhausted even though they dont actually 'look ill'.

You should join in and tell him how busy you've been and how tiring it all is- sounds like he needs to realise that he's not the only one who works hard.
It probably helps him to wind down to reflect on his day and get some acknowledgement from you-I'd just humour him.

my dp gets in really late and makes me a cup of tea, though i'm right lazy

That's not really my interpretation of what male peacocking is actually. It just sounds like hes knackered!!! Although he DOES need to realise that you are busy etc too. If he was strutting around flirting with other women or flexing his muscles in front of you, then I was say he was peacocking

I tend to find the people who go on and on about how busy they are tend to be the ones who aren't! The really busy ones are too busy doing stuff!

Maybe he is tired and busy? That doesn't exclude tiredness on your part. Also a sexist title.

I do that & I'm not a bloke I just go to work

If he cant talk to you about how hard his day has been, who can he talk to?

He works damn hard so that you can watch daytime TV, so a little appreciation is needed.

Ha ha ha, daytime TV, that is funny. I work from home 2 days a week and look after children rest of the time.

I do talk to him and as I said in OP I get that he works hard and I acknowledge this when we talk, but it's endless some nights. I was exagerating with the term 'peacocking' but you get where I am coming from.

I think I would find it quite a turn on if he did flex his muscles and had a bit of a flirt with other women as it would be so unlike him.

He's away tonight so no peacocking in this house!

Competitive parental tiredness is an Olympic level sport at our house! I am currently winning as in early pregnancy. A few weekend shifts on Mr Choo's part and i'll be back in the silver medal position, though.

Ah I've been using the early pregnancy card for a few weeks now- think its wearing a bit thin now though!

Oh dear, Mr Steps does this, although not to the extent of not making his own cup of tea. Eventually I booted him off to the GP, partly to check that he really DIDN'T have something wrong with him and partly because I hoped the GP would do what I hoped he would and tell DH to man up, get some early nights and drink less caffeine. DH was duly sent away from GP with a flea in his ear and complaints about tiredness have decreased markedly since.

I had my ex on my doorstep last night telling me how tired he was.. he had had DD round for tea, first time he'd seen her in a week... diddums.

My understanding is that peacocking is targeted flirting, often combined with wearing something outrageous to stand out (eg feather boa, crazy hat, snakeskin trousers) I learned this when reading Neil Strauss "The Game". :) (very interesting book by the way)

What you are describing sounds like the Tired Olympics to me, and yes it's annoying on a regular basis - especially if it's one sided. Appreciating what partners do for each other is important of course, but I am guessing from your tone that he wants to have a fuss made of him, but doesn't reciprocate?

mamachoo I love that 'competitive parental tiredness' My ex and I used to do this at olympic level and I thought I would have permanent possesion of the gold medal once we spilt and I would be working full time and main carer of DD... but apprently not... he's pulled out all the stops... huffing, puffing, emails and texts to tell me ever last thing he has done with her ... yawn.