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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

Original poster

cross at primary school

22 replies

dmo · 17/05/2011 10:02

i am a childminder and look after a little girl who lives with her dad. dad cant read or write so communcation is through chat only

anyway it is very hard to get money from him and he owed me £35 so i asked for it and the very next day he gabe me £70 cash and asked if i would pay dinners as he owed £35 to them.

so the money he gave me was 3x£20 and 1x£10

i put £40 in a envelope with childs name on it and gave it to school saying the change must be given to me and not dad as it was my change (teachers and i go back years and they know history etc)

went today to collect change and they have put it towards this wks dinners

wouldnt be so bad but will take me ages to explain to dad and actually get my money back out of him

anyway rant over just wanted to air it...........bloody school arrrrrrrrrrrr

OP posts:

ClaireC76 · 17/05/2011 10:09

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

squeakytoy · 17/05/2011 10:15

why will it take "ages" to explain?

StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 17/05/2011 10:30

I would go directly to the school and explain it to them - that the £5 change was your money, not the dad's money or the school's money, and insist that they refund it pronto.

oldraver · 17/05/2011 10:33

They dont have the right to do that as you told them the change was yours, since when are you paying for someone else's school meals ?

Flisspaps · 17/05/2011 10:34

Go in, complain. It's not their money to allocate as they see fit.

Original poster

dmo · 17/05/2011 10:36

went in but they said the money is gone now

OP posts:

ClaireC76 · 17/05/2011 10:41

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

Grabaspoon · 17/05/2011 10:42

It won't be gone - they will have money in a kitty somewhere

ClaireC76 · 17/05/2011 10:42

hassle twice?! lol - didn't proof-read because I'm so annoyed when people do things like this!!

Original poster

dmo · 17/05/2011 10:45

thanks Claire x

OP posts:

MumblingRagDoll · 17/05/2011 10:51

No! they cannot do that! go back, speak to HT and explain....don't take nonsense from any office or reception staff.

PaperView · 17/05/2011 10:56

Claire - why are you putting links on every post? It's not relevant to the OP in any way.

DMO - why are you paying the school for him? can he not have put the money in an envelope and paid it via his DD? I have to say that if i was the school i would have put the change towards the next payment too if he owed £35.

BeerTricksPotter · 17/05/2011 10:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ClaireC76 · 17/05/2011 11:02

Paperview - I'm not writing any irrelevant answers I try my best to make every comment count and I think the person I send my comment to has a right to check my credibility be having access to my website.

Particularly when I answer medical questions as my details on my blog confirm that I am qualified as an immunologist/geneticist.

In addition, I feel that your asking me that question is also not relevant to the OP in any way and you should have maybe asked me privately.

dmo Apologies for taking up your thread with my reply to Paperview but felt I needed to reply publicly to a question I was asked publicly. Sorry!

DaftApeth · 17/05/2011 11:14

Claire, what has this thread got to do with any qualifications you may or may not have ?

Most of us just say in our threads if we have any qualifications relevant to the answer we have given. Putting your website at the end of all your posts just smacks of you trying to promote your own website and doesn't mean you actually have any of those qualifications!

BeerTricksPotter · 17/05/2011 11:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 17/05/2011 11:16

If it was me, dmo, I would be going to the school and insisting that they sorted this out. They were given clear instructions on what to do with the change, and failed to follow those instructions. They had no legal right to decide what to do with the change - it was not their money. In effect, it could be seen as theft. I would be making all this crystal clear to them, and I suspect that would galvanise them to sort the situation out promptly.

DaftApeth · 17/05/2011 11:21

I agree with stayingdavidtennantsgirl, go back into the school and make a fuss.

Unless it is a generally understood rule that any change is always put towards next weeks lunches, they should be willing to pay you back.

ClaireC76 · 17/05/2011 11:27

I didn't say THIS was a medical question I was giving examples of reasons for offering further information about myself as I believe in transparency as a concept in life, in general.

If anyone has been offended by this then I offer my apologies. However, I joined this site yesterday and I think it's a bit harsh the way nobody has offered advice on something they think I'm doing wrong, or asked if I know the usual way of doing things amongst regulars....they've just made assumptions.

Just because a link is there doesn't mean you have to click on it. I'm afraid my knowledge of social networking has been learned over the years from my partner who works in social media/networking and you will find that it is the 'norm' to sign off with your name and then a link to.....whatever. If that is not how things are done here then thanks for letting me know!

StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 17/05/2011 11:57

Claire - I can see that you didn't understand the way that people do things on mumsnet, and that you have done things differently on other sites. Generally on here people don't post links to their website with every post - you can link to your website from your profile, and if people doubt your credentials/experience for commenting on something, they can look at you profile (if you make it public) and follow the link from there - that is probably less intrusive than putting it in every post.

That said, I don't think people have been offensive in their replies to you - what's been said looks fairly mild to me.

So perhaps best to draw a line under it, and enjoy being a part of mumsnet - it is a great site, and one I am proud to be part of, especially when the members are offering support to eachother - online and in real life.

I hope you enjoy it here.

Original poster

dmo · 17/05/2011 12:00

most of my parents hand me loose money to hand into school all the time for example £5 for milk money £5 trip money £9 dinner money etc etc i then put the money into a envelope with childs name on it and the purpose

most parents treat me like a PA and think i only care for their child!!!!!!!!

the other day a parents said to me "i will take child to school in the morning as i am starting late so you can have a nice lie in"

OP posts:

ClaireC76 · 17/05/2011 12:02

I have actually just been speaking to someone at mumsnet HQ and it's all sorted.

I didn't think anyone had been offensive, just harsh as I said, by which I meant a little quick to judge. It was not promotion for any reason, I certainly don't profit from it in anyway, and was hurt that people were quick to judge and think I was being underhanded as I am absolutely not in anyway at all.

Line drawn though as you say, and thank you for your reasonable and objective response.

Flip