Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

Original poster

to ask dp to uninvite

17 replies

MurielTheActor · 17/05/2011 09:37

friends of his that he invited to my birthday without asking me?
She (of the couple) is someone I have never got on with. They have always been included in birthday celebrations, as we have in theirs, but there have always been 'issues' between us. Not even sure what they are, tbh, except that i feel very uncomfortable in her presence and don't like how I feel around her.
ALSO - we have recently moved home - a very prolonged stressful time during which dp and I pulled out all the stops to buy the beautiful house we now live in.
They came round for dinner not long after we moved and she's so up her arse with her life, her career, her dull friends she didn't say a single word about the house.
So I've had it with her and told dp to uninvite them.
AIBU

OP posts:

sparkle12mar08 · 17/05/2011 09:40

Yes, frankly. He should have asked you first but it's just the height of bad manners to uninvite people from things. Put up with her this time, but make it absolutely clear that you do not want her in your home or at any function of your family's ever again. Leave her to your husband to deal with at the party and just politely ignore her.

allhailtheaubergine · 17/05/2011 09:41

No, you can't uninvite people.

BluddyMoFo · 17/05/2011 09:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Flisspaps · 17/05/2011 09:43

YABU - it's rude to univite people. Let your husband deal with her at the pary and tell him that you don't want her in your house in the future.

FranSanDisco · 17/05/2011 09:43

YABU and you sound as bad as each other frankly.

Pictish · 17/05/2011 09:43

Erm...a bit, yeah. You can't exactly uninvite people to things.
I realise you don't like her, but to my mind, to expect your dh to actually say 'Muriel doesn't want you there' is churlish as hell. So she didn't compliment your house? So what?
Think you're being very childish, sorry.

SenoritaViva · 17/05/2011 09:43

I suppose if DP is happy to uninvite them then that's OK. Since they have always been invited before then I can see why he might have asked them.

She does sound selfish and not the kind of friend you want but I would still hate to uninvite someone - do you share the same friends and will you come across them again? If not then I wouldn't worry but if you will socially come across them elsewhere then I would swallow it for this birthday and never invite them to your place again.

compo · 17/05/2011 09:43

Just cancelthe whole thing and go out with dp
what is it with adults celebrating birthdays unless it's a special one

TotemPole · 17/05/2011 09:50

Some people aren't that 'housey'. So though the house seems important to you and you OH, it might not register with her.

I don't think you should uninvite her, that'll cause problems.

Are you sure you aren't being oversensitive about her?

Pictish · 17/05/2011 09:52

I know what you mean Compo.

I do get very rolly eyed at adults making a fuss over their birthdays. There's nowt wrong with a nice prezzie and a day of spoiling, but some peeps take the .

I have a close friend like this....gets all squealy and precious over her birthday....she's 37 and it aint attractive.

Continuum · 17/05/2011 10:45

Rude to rescind the invitation, especially hiding behind your dp, and it will then end up causing problems and bad feelings which could easily be avoided.

Also I don't get why people should be incredibly happy about other people's houses, if you're happy with it surely that's enough?!

DoMeDon · 17/05/2011 10:50

YABU to univite unless you're happy to do it yourself. You will be causing much bad feeling between your DH and friend. He can invite who he wants to a parties surely?!

seeker · 17/05/2011 10:55

So you want your dp to uninvite someone (what's he going to say, by the way - really sorry, we've jsut realized after all these years that we don;t like you so you're nto invited to our partyt any more - how old are you - 3???????) because she didn;t fo all over the top about your" lurvely home"?

Grow up.

CocoPopsAddict · 17/05/2011 10:58

Do they know other people that you know, i.e. would they hear about the party? Or could he just tell them it's cancelled?

GooGooMuck · 17/05/2011 10:59

YABU.

ring them up and tell them you don't like her.

If you don't want to do that, then don't expect your DP to uninvite them. It would be very rude.

BeerTricksPotter · 17/05/2011 11:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

minxofmancunia · 17/05/2011 11:07

YABU and childish they way you've seen your arse about her not fawning over your precious home.

I get a sniff of jealousy and competitiveness here tbh. Are there going to be a few people at the party? If so they'll be plenty of dilution so you won't have to interact with her that much after the initial pleasantries. I've beeen in loads of social situations where you have to suck up to someones partner who you're not that keen on. It's called being polite.

Flip