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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to want to say something about

46 replies

pinkyp · 11/05/2011 21:39

was on the fantastic Hmm facebook earlier and my friend was commenting on a status about a mum trying to get her baby to take a bottle rather than bf, fair enough nothing wrong with that. My friend however was saying things like "its so much better than bf, loads easier and you have loads more freedom"....ermmm...wtf?? I know i'm not going to say anything but i really want to come give me a good flaming to put me in my place please Grin

OP posts:
LostMyIdentityAlongTheWay · 11/05/2011 21:42

God, that's an argument you won't win. For every b'fer, there'll be bottlers (word? should be....) galore. To each their own...
I b/f all of my three, and it was easy. My sister nearly killed her nips trying to b/f and bottled both of hers. Whatever....non?
I would not get involved, other than maybe to say 'to each their own, and their decision'. You say the other friend wrote about "Freedom?" Fuck me, dont' have kids if it's freedom you want, love....!

AgentZigzag · 11/05/2011 21:43

I found feeding with a bottle much easier than bf, perhaps your friend who commented felt the same.

Why do you feel you can't say anything to her?

AgentZigzag · 11/05/2011 21:44

And what is it you feel you can't say?

Tryharder · 11/05/2011 21:44

Perhaps you should have linked the recent newspaper articles about ff babies being naughtier than bf babies and you could have started a proper fb bunfight....

Original poster
pinkyp · 11/05/2011 21:48

I was just suprised by her comment as we were both out having lunch a few weeks ago my dc got hungry...whipped the boobs out and carried on, a bit later her dc woke and was hungry so we had to dash off to her house. Once we got there she was messing about sterilisng, boiling kettle etc must of been at least a hour after we got back to her house before he got fed....i know everyones situations different but how can she think doing that was easier than me bf?

OP posts:
LostMyIdentityAlongTheWay · 11/05/2011 21:49

tryharder I can't hardly think of ANY topic that will get mothers going more than boob vs. bottle. EVERY time I've seen it come up on FB/MN, it's been bloody!! Although it being in the news probably does account for it being mentioned today.

Am I being stupid, but why does a FBer want to share stuff about b/f on such a public site. Believe me, I'm FAR from being a prude, but that - I wouldn't do, not becuase I give a stuff about getting em out in public, I have, and had right dingdongs about it too.... but I suspect some of my FB friends wouldn't have appreciated the mental image!

AgentZigzag · 11/05/2011 21:51

I didn't see sterilising/boiling kettles/setting timers etc as messing about or any hassle in the slightest, because it's what I had to do to feed my beautiful babies pinky.

Original poster
pinkyp · 11/05/2011 21:51

I agree LostMy... i get sick of reading " is relxing in the bath"...

OP posts:
Panzee · 11/05/2011 21:53

Maybe your friend was just trying to reassure her. Being nice and that.

SnuffleTurtle153 · 11/05/2011 22:58

Makes a nice change from hearing 'Ooh I'm bfing my baby aren't I fabulous and isn't it wonderful'. Each to their own, no one has the right to comment on another woman's decision as to how they feed their child IMO.

Punkatheart · 11/05/2011 23:01

I did laugh at the news report about breastfed babies. Mine was bf until she was 14 months old and she was (and is) a proper little monkey.

Personal choice. Pure and simple.

emsyj · 11/05/2011 23:08

I do think tho LostMyIdentityAlongTheWay that there are degrees of freedom.... My DD has never accepted a bottle and as a result I couldn't go anywhere without her for 9 months. It did get me down a lot bit. I would have liked to be able to have a bath in peace, or get more than 1.5 hours' sleep at one time etc. A close friend of mine has bf both her children, but they both reliably went 3-4 hours between feeds and would accept the occasional bottle, so her experience has been very different from mine.

NettoSuperstar · 11/05/2011 23:12

Reason 127 not to use Facebook

AINU to think Facebook is a horror of a site, aimed at huns, idiots, chumps and people I'd rather not know?

MumblingRagDoll · 11/05/2011 23:33

I susppose she... and you don't realise that you can formula feed very easily in a restaurant. The powder can be carried in little containers and added to boiled cooled water which you bring ready in a bottle...then warmed...or not...as per. babies taste. It's quite simple and easy.

MumblingRagDoll · 11/05/2011 23:35

Like AgentZ I also found bottles simple and easy....sterilizing is done in one big batch....ready for the day...and then water is boiled and cooled and placed in multiple bottles. You don't have to do it every time.

MumblingRagDoll · 11/05/2011 23:37

In fact...since as a new bottle feeding Mother is TAUGHT about the things I mentioned by HV when a baby is born...I find your comment about her taking an hour to prep one bottle is rather....unbelievable.

AgentZigzag · 11/05/2011 23:39

Or even easier in a restaurant mumbling, just use a ready made carton.

scotsgirl23 · 11/05/2011 23:41

Mumblingragdoll....please have a wee gander at the formula prep guidelines from the WHO and food standards agency. Not wanting to have any sort of argument with you whatsoever, but if you need to have a not completely freshly prepared bottle then you should make it up fully first then chill as fast as possible. Formula powder isn't actually sterile and can contain some nasty bugs. It needs to be mixed with boiling water to kill them.

P.s. - I formula feed so I am most definitely not having a go but the advice from health professionals on this is shockingly lax!

igggi · 11/05/2011 23:46

I haven't used formula (yet) but even I knew you were supposed to use boiling water.

AgentZigzag · 11/05/2011 23:49

Yes, reading back mumblings posts, they have changed a bit because I used to make up batches for DD1 10 years ago and it's not recommended to do that now.

And I've never had anything taught to me by any health professional on how to bottle feed (in the UK), had to work out the nuances for myself.

How we managed without MN I'll never know Grin

FurKnickersAndNoCoat · 12/05/2011 00:28

why can't women just get on with feeding their own babies through a bottle or a breast or the left toe of a fire breathing dragon and get on with it. for every person you (and you is general here) decide to stuff your own theories down their neck there are a million reasons why you are wrong, and a million reasons why you are right. each to their own. until you see said child suckling from the teat of a she wolf i think, back the eff off.

FurKnickersAndNoCoat · 12/05/2011 00:29

and even then the she wolf might be the mother in law Grin

vajazzhands · 12/05/2011 01:32

I FF unfortunatley- and its a hell of a lot more trouble than bf..

why dd? why can't you just take boob like a normal baby!

Guidelines for preperation are a pain in the arse and no HV would ever tell you to just make it up for the day.

Mumblinrag doll the the hour prep is really very believable. It's great fun making ff. Boiling a kettle whilst a baby screams in your face then waiting for it to just cool enough to pour the powder in (still needs to be hot so the bacteria in the forrmula is killed), then wait for it to cool properly for the baby.

LadyBeagleEyes · 12/05/2011 01:43

My son is 15, very tall, healthy and smart.
Didn't have mumsnet then but made my choices.
Guess if I BF or FF. Gwan, guess.

iscream · 12/05/2011 03:36

If she rushed off to make a bottle a week ago, she must have already made the switch.
Ill prepared not to have a bottle with her.
She may be not producing enough milk, or it hurts...whatever her reason, it is her business, and doesn't really matter. Babies fed by bottles thrive too.