Giving hugs on MN. AIBU?

[RingEir]

I have been on MN for a couple of months now and have noticed a few comments to the effect that it is 'against the rules' to give people hugs on the forums. I have read the netiquette and guidelines and can't find any reference to this. What's wrong with giving hugs? I, for one, appreciate them when I am upset etc.

????? People always give hugs on here!

This for ex:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/1211974-I-feel-like-im-a-lost-cause

"I know the rules regarding hugs, and all that jazz!" - what rules??

It just means we avoid random hugs in the way we avoid text speak & tickers.

I've only been here just over a year so I don't know all the history but I've always taken it as a kind of jokey way to express that hugs are reserved for the serious stuff, not just added as fluffiness here there and everywhere.

I give hugs where they are sincerely needed. I truly mean them and if it was RL, they would be given for the same reason.

If it was mwah mwah darling I could understand.

There are some poor souls who post on Mumsnet at their lowest ebb. I wish I could do more at times but if I can send a cyber hug - it feels that I am doing at least something.....

It's not a real rule. It's one of the fake rules some MNetters think we need, along with not starting a thread about a thread and bow down to MN royalty.

All a bunch of twaddle.

Give all the hugs you want and feel free to ignore the so called royalty and start as many threads about threads that you want.

Or do none of the above.

You can also start a thread about a thread too. I say so.

There are the rules set by MNHQ, and the unwritten rules established by the posters - ie the etiquette that defines the atmosphere of Mumsnet.

Posters tend to give {hugs} when they feel strongly moved by a distressed post. We tend to look down on kissy, fluffy huns scattering hugs willy-nilly. That's for The Other Site (ie netmums with its sparkly tickers and swear filters).

Anarchy!
Down with the rules!

Everybody now, GROUPHUG!!!!

I like the rules :) Earlier this year when my bil was dying I think I asked for a hug or two and got them and it really, really helped. It would't have nearly the same force if people hugged every time their toaster broke or they couldn't find their car keys.

It loses its meaning if done too often.

As other posters have said, hugs on here tend to be saved for when they're really needed, rather than used as a general fluffy sign off to a post. I've had some and they've been appreciated.

Like any community there are unwritten rules - here its generally not using text speak (which I am very grateful for!), gratuitous hugging or calling people Hun all the time .

"feel free to ignore the MN royalty"

Sorry, but the MN royalty thing is a load of bollocks. Any memes are by a majority consensus, not by an edict from a "royal" few. If the majority wanted multiple hugs, text speak and hunning then it would happen regardless.

I should also point out, if people do go against the general consensus of a group, and decide to "do their own thing", like constant hugging, just like in real life, they will be upon as a bit weird and fluffy. Or at least, their hugs will be as significant as a fart.

But nobody will stop anybody from hugging, if you feel that is the kind of poster you want to be, you are free to hug and squeeze, squeel and fluff. People will roll their eyes, but most likely not say anything.

And there is no such thing as "Royalty". It is a term newcomers tend to use, especially when throwing their rattles out of the pram if they feel they dont get enough recognition or attention.

Sends right royal farts. (Well I am not allowed hugs)

I give out hugs fairly often, gave out a squishy one for no reason at all yesterday because that's just the kinda kooky freak I am

Agree they lose their meaning if given out too frequently, and that threads about threads are the best you can get.

i have no idea what any of you are talking about and for some reason that makes me happy.

Agree with what others have said about hugs.

Threads about threads depends. If it's a thread specifically to continue an argument with or bash someone then it's not cool in my book. But if something comes up on another thread and is interesting to warrant a discussion of its own then why not? That's how conversations often go.

Awww aren't you lovely cannydoit

Quick, start a thread before you realise WTF's going on, it's all downhill from there.

hugs cannydoit.

unmumsnettly, of course

Can one of you gimmers explain the Royalty thing? cba to read the other thread. Ta :)

so its a bad thing?

Oh is it the name for the main clique on here?