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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think this man was being a real tw*t

19 replies

ButterflySally · 10/05/2011 19:28

I was walking to work this morning along a walkway behind a row of houses. A man and his dog were walking towards me. The dog was off the lead and the man was calling to the dog, trying to get the dog to come back to him. The man called out to me asking if I would grab the dog for him.

Now, the dog looked ok and friendly enough but I thought...I don't know the dog, I don't know the dog's temperament, and I don't know how the dog will react to a complete stranger reaching out to grab him. I'm also (quite obviously) 7 months pregnant so thought I'd be putting myself in an unnecessarily risky situation.

I politely said to the man, "I'm sorry, I'm not prepared to do that". The man looked angry and said, "Grab his collar for me!" I said, "I'm sorry, I don't know what your dog is like, I'm not prepared to do that. I'm happy to try to shoo him towards you but I'm not going to grab him". I stood at what I felt was a safe distance from the dog and waved my arms a bit (completely ineffective and the dog ignored me and tottered on).

The man was visibly angry and shaking his head and muttering. Given he wasn't able to control his dog and was angry with me for not doing so, I couldn't resist pointing out the obvious by saying "The dog should be on his lead". The man replied, "Oi, don't get cocky with me, love". I ignored him and continued walking to work.

AIBU to think this man was completely out of order for expecting me to grab his dog and getting angry that I wouldn't??

OP posts:
ThePontypinesAreFriendsOfMine · 10/05/2011 19:31

I think you did exactly the right thing. If he's not able to control his dog that's not your problem.

pjmama · 10/05/2011 19:31

Yes, he was a wanker and should train his dog. He knows it and that's why he was defensive when you pointed out the error of his ways! Grin

AgentZigzag · 10/05/2011 19:32

You did well to say all that given the speed situations like that happen.

Perhaps you were being a bit cocky, but then he was being cheeky expecting you to control his dog.

FlorenceDaphne · 10/05/2011 19:33

You were not at all unreasonable. We have the friendliest, soppiest dog in the world. We can snatch him, turn him upside down and cover him in kisses- he loves it. A friend once asked if she could pick him up- oh yes, we said, and she went to lift him. He braced his legs against being lifted, and growled at her- it was a real wakeup call that he only liked being grabbed by his nearest and dearest. It sounds ridiculous, but we hadn't realised this at all- I suppose because he was so docile with us.

NewShooz · 10/05/2011 19:37

How odd to ask someone to grab your dog for you! Confused
You did the right thing in my eyes, I wouldn't have done it either, and I wouldn't have asked anyone to do the same with my dog (if I had one)....
strange man!!

Dontbugmemalone · 10/05/2011 19:39

YANBU, as another poster said, it was very odd for him to ask you to grab the dog.
You were right to be cautious.

babybythesea · 10/05/2011 20:03

I can only think of one reason I'd ask someone to intervene - if my dog was headed towards a road and I was worried they would shoot out into it. I'd yell at anyone to do anything if I thought my dog was about to get hurt, and I wouldn't be processing reasons why someone might not want to get involved. But then I'd have her on a lead anyway, so it wouldn't arise. This doesn't sound like that sort of situation and you were not being U to refuse. And he was being an idiot to react like that, especially after you'd given your reasons (I might be annoyed at first but feel very sheepish after someone had said all that to me!!)

ComeWhineWithMe · 10/05/2011 20:08

Yes he was a twat, he was probably one of those dog people who think they are the most important things in the world.

saffy85 · 10/05/2011 20:11

YANBU sounds like the dog wasn't paying any attention to his owner so therefore may not have been well trained, if it was trained at all. I wouldn't have grabbed the dog either. And yes the bloke was a twat for getting the arse with you. Not your fault he clearly can't keep control of his dog.

gotolder · 10/05/2011 20:13

YANBU

disgustedperson · 10/05/2011 20:23

What a twat.

I wish I had been there to kick him in his parts....then I would have said "I WILL get cocky with you lad!"

disgustedperson · 10/05/2011 20:24

I'm not pregnant and I wouldn't have grabbed it either!

Bananamash · 10/05/2011 20:28

YANBU.

I am a "dog person" and wouldn't grab a strange dog by the collar either. To a dog a stranger leaning over you and grabbing you is threatening and said dog may feel the need to defend himself against you, which is fair enough from their point of view!

kaid100 · 10/05/2011 21:01

You did the right thing.

MadamDeathstare · 10/05/2011 21:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Popbiscuit · 10/05/2011 21:06

Put it out of your head. What was he thinking?

pineapple70 · 10/05/2011 21:36

What a selfish, irresponsible dog owner.

Try to forget it

HecateQueenOfTheNight · 10/05/2011 22:33

I am deeply suspicious. My first thought would be "Why does he want me to grab the dog. Is he going to use that as an excuse to get close and grab my purse or something"

Which, I realise, is very paranoid, but it's the way my mind works Grin walkway between a row of house, quiet (I assume) get you to hold the dog, he comes over - bob's your uncle.

HecateQueenOfTheNight · 10/05/2011 22:44

Hmm I am a deeply suspicious person, that should say. Otherwise it's not really clear what I mean Grin

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