To be thinking of having a 5th child?

[lesley33]

I had 4 children in my early 20's. I am now 46 and they are all adults. But I have been feeling an increasing broodiness and can't stop thinking about having another child. I confessed this to my OH at the weekend expecting my OH to say don't be ridiculous. Instead my OH said, well chances are low that we could physically have another child - but if you want to try, fine.

I know the chances of me getting pregnant again are diminishing every day. And tbh I had thought that I was too old to get pregnant again. But a friend who is the same age as me has just had her first baby. Seeing and holding her baby has made me feel so broody.

I admit I am horrified at the thought of having a teenager in my early 60's. But I loved having babies/children and I know that if I don't try and get pregnant soon I would have absolutely no chance of having another child.

We can afford to do this. I wouldn't have IVF or anything like that. It would just be a case of me no longer using contraception and seeing if I got pregnant. AIBU to consider this? Part of me thinks I am, but when I held my friends baby the desire to have another of my own was very strong.

If you are happy to leave it to chance why not? Any chance of grandchildren soon?

But chances (or conceiving naturally) must be low, and how would you feel about a downs baby? Might be good idea to get blood tests done at GP would give you idea of quantity of eggs left etc.

YANBU

Yes the idea of a disabled child does worry me. I have worked a lot with disabled children and their families and so have some idea of the extra work and stress involved - especially if the children need lots of operations and medical care.

Doesn't seem to be any grandchildren on the horizon. And I don't want to turn into a pushy mum pushing for my children to provide me with some.

Totally understand broodiness. probably sensible to think it through, eg could you cope with the new baby stage, toddler, teenager when a pensioner etc. Am at the baby/toddler stage now and don't reckon I'll want to return here when it's long past!

Also, how do you both feel about the risks, eg miscarriage (think the rate is around 50% after 40), or the baby having a health condition?

D'you think it could be a hormonal thing?!

Was that really your husband's response? If you want to? Not we?

Fudgegirl - My OH said if I want to. But whe I expfressed surprise OH said it would be great to have another baby/child. I think basically my OH won't be too bothered if we don't have another baby, but will be happy to have another baby if you know what I mean.

BTW I know my OH would do lots of the work and be supportive, so thats not an issue.

I guess one of the things that worries me is our health. I have some friends in their 60's. And i have seen how even people who have a healthy lifestyle can suddenly develop a major illness and become old almost overnight. Whilst others can carry on still seeming very young and healthy. Living healthy can increase your chances of being young and healthy in your 60's, but through experience I know it is till a lottery.

I think you are doing the right thing thinking of the baby as well as your own needs.

Are you sure this isn't a mid life crisis?

Im 46 and within the last year say the demise of my periods, last one in January, you don't have long to try. For me it would be the perfect time to have a child, unfortunately nature has taken the option for me away, that aside I have been steralised so was next to no chance.

Why not at least try> Nothing ventured...

i have just had another at 42 and he is number five .. it is amazing x