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AIBU?

To think i know how my childs name is pronounced?

242 replies

crappymummum · 08/05/2011 14:36

So my friend says she has just had an in depth argument with one of her friends who i happen to know over my daughters name.

DD is called Luisa.Not Louisa but LuiSa as in emphasis on the S not the soft sounding s in Louisa.I think the name originates from Germany but is widely used in Spain.
My DD was born in Spain (we are now back in the UK) so i liked the thought of a Spanish name, especially as we planned on staying there for some time.My Aunt is Spanish and also called Luisa.

Apparently this argument started when the lady started arguing with my friend when she was pronouncing it correctly saying no its Louisa,it's stupid etc and how it is just an alternative spelling but pronounced the same etc etc.

This is becoming a bit of a problem as i have noticed friends/teachers etc calling her Louisa...even receiving invites to parties with Louisa on.

Should i just let them get on with it for an easy life for my daughter and just accept that Louisa is what she will be called?

AIBU to be really bloody annoyed about this woman?

OP posts:
PinotGrigiosKittens · 09/05/2011 09:56

My sister is Caroline and she gets called Carolin alot. Drvies her fecking crazy.

My friend is called Carolin and gets called Caroline alot. Doesn't bother her in the slightest.

ZZZenAgain · 09/05/2011 09:56

I didn't feel I really got the video but I thought the point was the vowel sound changed a bit because of the way you let the air out. Teeth on lower lip, continuous flow of air - fork
lips pressed together, force air out in a burst - pork

ZZZenAgain · 09/05/2011 09:58

mind you I think we do that without thinking, don't we (if you say both fast a few times). Don't really hear a difference myself

vintageteacups · 09/05/2011 10:01

My friend's child is called Elise and is half french. Therefore, the S is prnounced as a Z with a long 'i' sound. However, she does explain to people how to pronounce it but she says she's pretty much given up now.

I did know a Luisa (German child) and I knew how to pronounce her name as I spoke German but lots of people called her Louisa with a soft S. Her mum was annoyed but didn't bother too much as they were going back to Germany.

I think if you are British and living in the UK, it'll be a lot harder to convince people of its correct pronunciation.

ShowOfHands · 09/05/2011 10:02

ZZZen is right. Because you change the beginning of the word, you change the vowel sound and therefore they don't rhyme. My friend insists the difference is really obvious. I try not to think about it as it messes with my head.

Wordwork · 09/05/2011 10:11

Perhaps it is true in some accents but not in others. I've nver heard them not rhyme.The non-rhyming is not what the video says, though. It doesn't say anything about rhyming. It says how to recognise an f sound and a p sound from the shape of the mouth when making them, so that you don't wrongly interpreate pork as fork and vice versa.

I don't know why this is niggling me. There are more important things to ponder on a monday morning. Grin

PinotGrigiosKittens · 09/05/2011 10:14

My brain hurts Grin

lesley33 · 09/05/2011 10:16

In my accent they don't rhyme. There is a small difference in how the vowels are pronounced, but it is subtle.

Wordwork · 09/05/2011 10:16

Yes, the fork is stabbing the pork meatball of my brain.

My uncle's favouraite, and oft-repeated joke: "Get the meatballs out, Ma: we're coming to a fork in the road!"

(Sorry for off-topic ramble. Will stop now.)

PinotGrigiosKittens · 09/05/2011 10:18

arf at Uncle Meatball Grin

doings · 09/05/2011 10:25

YANBU but you're in for a life of stressing if you let it bother you. I'm ancient and have an unusual name - long before the days of the variety we have now.

My name has been constantly mispronounced and spelt incorrectly in birthday cards, invites etc. I've given up pointing it out years ago and only make a fuss if it's on any legal document.

Funnily enough, it really hacks DH off when friends I've known for years still spell it wrong. But, hey, life's too short for you to worry your or your dd heads about.

LoveLeonardCohen · 09/05/2011 10:29

I wouldv'e pronouced it the English way if I'd seen it on paper. Does it really matter that much? You'll have years of getting worked up about it..i have the same with my DD but it doesn't really bother me that much

VictorGollancz · 09/05/2011 10:35

OP, keep on going until they get the message! I'm a Louisa and get 'Louise' all the time. It's annoying: it's not my name, no matter how similar other people think it is. I find roaring 'Louis-aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa' at people usually does the trick. It's a friendly roar though; both Louisa and Luisa are comparatively rare names, so I try not to get too humpy about it.

I work with an Italian Luisa (the first time I've ever met anyone with the same-ish name) and she understands how to pronounce my name, as I understand how to pronounce hers. As others have said, it's not bloody rocket science.

ShowOfHands · 09/05/2011 10:36

Woodwork, the video doesn't explicity say 'they don't rhyme', it's merely explaining the pronunciation of them and illustrating the difference. And because of the pronunciation, they don't rhyme. The video might not say it explicitly, but the fact is the same.

But let's not get sidetracked, I'm hungry and lunch is hours away. I should not be thinking about meatballs at 10.30am.

Wordwork · 09/05/2011 10:53

I hope crappymummmmm will forgive me for just one more Forkporkgate intrusion onto her thread. I would like to say that I have been resaerching the matter carefully in the mirror for some time, and I have come to the conclusion that if you pronounce the words very slowly, and annunciate the opening consonants very explosively, fork has more of an 'r' sound in the middle and pork has more of a 'w' sound in the middle, Your mouth makes more of a catsbumface in the middle of pork than fork. So they are different. But I still wouldn't laugh Tennyson out of town for rhyming them.



vintageteacups · 09/05/2011 11:17

My first name is spelt in a different way (french) than the more common english spelling and I've spent my whole life telling people that it's 'ie' on the end and not y. However, now, I can't be bothered any more and if they spell it incorrectly, I just leave it - unless it's for an important document or reason where it has to be correct. I feel very liberated not to keep telling people how to spell it.

Lovecat · 09/05/2011 11:50

DD's name isn't mispronounced but it is constantly misspelt and then mispronounced by others reading the misspelling...

Caitlin. Pronounced (by me - before the Irish-speakers get on at me and tell me it should be said 'Cat-leen', I know, I know! - as Kate-Lyn)

Spelled by others as variously "Catlin", (Cat-Lyn) "Catiline" (Katy-lin), "Caitline" (Kate-leen - at least this is closest to the Irish pronunciation, but the spelling? WTF??)

Her own teacher does the first one, which makes me despair... thankfully she's now at a stage where she'll tell them it's not right, but she hesitates to tell the teacher she's wrong...

PinotGrigiosKittens · 09/05/2011 12:00

My niece is called Caitlin - we call her Cait :)

My own name is quite long and therefore I get called a shortened version. Many, many shortened versions with many, many spellings. My name is Jennifer but I get called Jenny, Jennie, Jen, Jenn, Jeni, Jenni, JJ, nnifer, nifs...none of which are my actual name Hmm

For this reason DH and I chose names with 3 letters for eldest and second sons. Third son has 5 letters but can't be shortened. Their school friends now elongate DS1 and DS2s name (adding an eeee sound) and call DS3 by his initial

You just gotta accept not seethe like I do Grin

Journey · 09/05/2011 12:18

I think the names are far too similiar, and even when you say that the emphasis is on the S it still sounds like the same name but with a slightly awkward accent put on it at the end.

The spelling of Luisa also looks like you just wanted a different spelling for Louisa.

SilentBob · 09/05/2011 12:40

Luisa is pronounced like Luis with an a. Lueessss and lueessssa.

Louisa is pronounced like Louise with an a. Looeezz and looeezza.

I have a Louisa as a sister who changed the spelling to Luisa in her 20s.

TobyLerone · 09/05/2011 12:50

Don't sweat the small stuff.

My daughter is called Esme. Pronounced Ez-me. Easiest name in the world to spell and pronounce...or so I thought!

She had a birthday party on Saturday and all but one of her friends (and all of the parents) call her Esmé (pron. Ez-may) out loud. Over half of the cards from her friends have an accent over the last 'e'.

It doesn't bother her in the least. Mind you, she's only 10. She's got a while of it yet! It was also my nana's name, and she used to shake her head at all the odd spellings of her name in cards etc.

PinotGrigiosKittens · 09/05/2011 12:53

Toby I thought it was pronounced es-may Blush

ShowOfHands · 09/05/2011 13:10

I love the name Esme but am glad I didn't ever use it (I thought about it). I've only ever heard people pronounce it Es-may but numerous MN threads have shown that it's a 50/50 split between Es-may and Es-me and the arguments go on and on and on. Hence people putting a superfluous accent on the end now to assure correct pronunciation for their child.

TobyLerone · 09/05/2011 13:18

I think most people think it's pronounced Ez-may. I would only pronounce it like that if it was spelled Esmé, rather than without the accent.

But it's such a tiny thing. It really doesn't matter. There are far bigger things to worry about!

ErnesttheBavarian · 09/05/2011 13:22

I think YABU and need to accept most people will pronounce it Louisa. You can carry on and pronounce it how you want to, and maybe for some it will rub off, for some not. I have a 2 ds with names that are 'normal' english names, and the German equivalent is spelt the same but pronounced differently. eg we called our sons Peter and Paul (not real names) we use the English pronunciation, but some people pronounce them the German way, eg Pay-ter and Powl, some use the English pronunciation. I don't mind either way tbh. I think if you have a name that is almost the same as a english equivalent, you need to accept some people will use the english pronunciation, especially as you are english yourselves. In our case, most people pronounce the boys with the english version, as that is how they introduce themselves, I guess it helps distinguish them from the other kids who have the same name (but pronounced the german way).

Don't sweat the small stuff. Only person who should be bothered is your dd really. If she doesn't like it she can easily say how her name should be correctly pronounced (which my ds3 does sometimes as his name doesn't exist in German, and is unusual and usually mis pronounced by people due to the vowel combination. He just says my name is XXX. it grates on me as it sounds ugly when mispronounced, but it doesn't bother me that people mispronounce it iyswim)

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