Just want to say sorry

[VerySorry]

Am posting this in AIBU & Chat as I know they get a lot of traffic.

Did something horrible today & need to get it off my chest (have namechanged as am a coward). Been struggling with PND for a while & don't think the meds are working all that well, & have had a totally rubbish day with my dd. Walking through a local park today late afternoon on way to town & group of schoolkids playing football near the path. One lad, prob about 12 or so ends up careering into me & pushchair, I think he was trying to stop the ball hitting us. So me being in foul mood due to aforementioned PND & rubbish day called him a f*ing idiot & carried on walking. Immediately felt bad & wanted to apologise but park really busy with loads of schoolkids & groups of mums with pushchairs I didn't want to draw even more attention to myself so I carried on. Have been stewing about it since it happened & would really like the child in question to know how sorry I am so if anyone has heard about this or if it was your child I am truly sorry & am disgusted & ashamed at my behaviour.

Aw :(

I don't think you have anything to apologise for!

He ploughed into you and your pushchair - that's dangerous - and I think it's a fairly reasonable immediate reaction to tell him he's a f*ing idiot!

Of course, if we were all perfect we'd be all mindful and calm about things - but it must've been scary for you and DC.

Have you had any counselling/support along with your meds?

Aww, don't beat yourself up about it. You were a bit short-tempered and if you saw him now you'd say sorry. Case closed! He's probably not given it a second thought.

But if you're not feeling good, and you think your meds aren't working too well - I think you need to tell someone who can help you find the right meds or dosage. Can you book GP appointment next week?

He will just think you were a bit rude and then forget about it. Which is what you should do.

Don't give it a second thought. You were having a shit day, he was in the wrong place at the wrong time. He probably just said "moody old witch" and started playing again, forgetting all about it. Concentrate on your lovely little babby and on feeling better x

I wouldn't worry hon.

We all have bad days.

It's the depression. When I'm ill the slightest thing plays on my mind.
Yes it wasn't pleasant for the kid but I'm sure he's forgotten by now.
Might be worth talking to GP about dosage or perhaps a different medication x

Don't feel bad, everyone has down days and does things they wouldn't otherwise, and I'm sure he didn't take it too much to heart - and it may make him think a bit more about careering into pushchairs! I did something similar a couple of weeks ago when a boy of about 12 kicked a ball in front of my car and I had to do an emergency stop with my (then) 5 week old in the back. I didn't swear at him but I did wind the window down and BELLOW, then I drove over his ball!! I didn't feel too good about that, either, but hey ho. Put it down as just one aspect of a bad day and move on X

I would have called him a fucking idiot if he fell into my pushchair - dont worry about it, but try and get more help, pnd is crushing, sorry your having crap time at the moment, but it really is just at the moment. it gets better

I dont have pnd and havent had a shitty day but would probably have said the same or very similar, as others have said dont give it another thought im sure he isnt , so go easy on yourself

I dont know how long you have been on the meds but some of them do take a while to start working, if its been a while may be worth going to the dr again. I really hope you start to feel better soon

Verysorry, your depression is making a mountain out of a molehill,lots of use have been there (or indeed still are).

The young lad prob went back to his mates, mentioned you swore at him and has carried on playing. He will have got over it by now.

If it will help perhaps you could use some CBT techniques on the situation to maybe help you in the future.

I wouldn't worry about it. If you still feel bad tomorrow, keep an eye out for him in the park and if you see him apologise.

Thanks for your replies, I've got a GP appointment next week so will have a chat then about my meds & possibly counselling. Been on them for a couple of months after denying to myself for about 6 months that there was anything wrong.

Dont worry - I dont have PND but I did call a woman a stupid cow yesterday. I was cycling up my road (one lane traffic due to parked cars) she could obviously see me but instead of waiting 10 seconds she carried on forcing me to dismount.

when we got home my ds2 said "mummy, why did you call her a stoopid caw?"

I'm always mardy at people and I've never had PND. I'm mardy just on the off chance, no real reason, and I've said worse than that just because I could.

Don't worry too much about it, I'm sure he just thought 'pfft'.