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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To take my son and his friends to a 12A at the cinema for his 8th Birthday

71 replies

pingu2209 · 06/05/2011 18:32

Would you let your child go to a 12A when they are 8?

OP posts:

zukiecat · 06/05/2011 21:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

annapolly · 06/05/2011 21:10

I went to see the fast and the furious last week. It is a 12A.

I was considering letting DS see it as he is 10 going on 40.

After seeing the film I would not let a 12 year old see it.

So depends on the film.

DBennett · 06/05/2011 21:14

International Movie DataBase (IMDb) has guides on content.

Check here for Thor.

pointydog · 06/05/2011 21:14

I'd take - and have taken - my own dc to see a 12a when well below the age of 12. I don't think I'd take other people's young children.

GloriaSmut · 06/05/2011 21:17

I'd be guided by the film content and knowledge of the child I was planning to take to see it rather than the categorisation of its suitability.

I would say that some cinemas do check the age of children though only I remember taking ds1 (actually aged 12) and his 10 year old brother to see a 12. The cinema staff queried the age of (the always small for his age) DS1 while not being at all bothered about how old his younger and bigger brother was. So if you are taking 8 year olds who look nearer 8 than 12, you might get asked if they are old enough.

activate · 06/05/2011 21:18

what's wrong with Rio or Hop - 10 and 13 year old boys enjoyed both

Gentleness · 06/05/2011 21:28

If it is a 12A and your child is 8, then someone somewhere thinks your child needs potentially 4 more years chance to mature to be able to deal with what they'd see. 4 years is a huge change and maturity hardly progresses in a nice straight line anyway. I know the 12A is to allow parents to decide based on their child's current maturity, but it is still a big gap - for me too big to even consider.

Everyone has their own idea of suitable of course, but surely to suggest this to or ask another parent just puts everyone in a difficult position. I don't face this issue yet as the oldest is

melpomene · 06/05/2011 23:14

BBFC Guidelines on 12/12A films

cat64 · 07/05/2011 00:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

lockets · 07/05/2011 08:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

kslatts · 07/05/2011 08:29

I would organise this as a party for an 8 year old as long as I'd checked with all the parents first. I would let my dd's go to a 12 A when they were 8.

jellyvodkas · 07/05/2011 08:31

My advice is check with the parents ofthe other boys to see if they are happy, and if so then fine.

Numberfour · 07/05/2011 08:37

I would not let a child of mine go to a 12A film if he was 8.

IWantToBeAFairyWhenIGrowUp · 07/05/2011 08:56

No I wouldn't unless I'd seen the film first. It would be interesting to know what your son's friends parents think though. TBH - I think I'd not do it as a party just in case. I'd just take my child.

@ the person that lets their 3 year old watch 12As though - I won't even let DDsome watch PGs and she's 4.

IWantToBeAFairyWhenIGrowUp · 07/05/2011 08:56

*watch some

LineRunner · 07/05/2011 09:20

I wouldn't take them to the 12A unless all the parents know which film and had genuinely agreed to it. Even then I'd hesitate. What if a kid freaks?

I took my kids to the 12A War Of The Worlds when they were about 9 and 11, and we had to leave because my daughter was so freaked out by all the blood on the landscape. If we'd had other kids with us it would have been incredibly difficult. I mean, she was really in an emotional state.

Still feel guilty.

IWantAnotherBaby · 07/05/2011 09:33

Is there some problem with understanding the film certificate here? The film has been certified suitable for children above 12. So its not suitable for those younger. OF COURSE YABU!! The certificate is there for a reason (and of course you could (and should) be turned away at the door, which happened to my 14 year old niece recently when she tried to see a 15 film with her father!).

LineRunner · 07/05/2011 09:35

12A means that kids can go in but only if accompanied by an adult.

12 is when they actually have to be 12 to get in.

melpomene · 07/05/2011 09:41

No, 12 is just for DVDs, while 12A is for cinema films (see my link above).

Agree with the point that it could risk embarrassing/excluding kids who are sensitive about films and those who are forbidden by their parents.

gillybean2 · 07/05/2011 09:51

No I wouldn't let me ds go to a 12A if he was still 8.
You never know how children will react; your own let alone anyone elses. And what if one child did feel scared and want to leave. Would they speak up in front of their friends? And if they did would you leave the others to watch the film while you took them out...?

Ds has been at a friend's house and clearly pointed out, at age 8, that pirates of the carribean was a 12 and he shouldn't be watching it. (mostly because he wanted to watch a different film and he found a good reason not to watch that one). The other parent hadn't even considered it an issue till he spoke up and I was totally shocked when he told me about this afterwards that they had even considered letting him watch it without thinking or asking me first! Their youngest ds 6 had been given it by his gran and said it was great...
However this same friend was telling me that she would have to have a word with a different friend who had her ds for a sleepover and he was now having nightmares over a film he'd watched while there. She wasn't going to let him go there for a sleepover again and her ds was so freaked out he was sleeping in their bed. And this child is 8 now. Nevermind that she was happy for him to watch 12A films at home (which I have no doubt this other friend is aware of and the dc would have happily told the friend's parents)

The clasification is there for a reason. Do not do this. If your ds is saying the films that are suitable for all his friends are lame then perhaps you need to take him on his own and do something else with the friends. However I can recommend Rio. Hop not so much.

Soups · 07/05/2011 09:59

It depends on the film, my 9 year old has seen 12a's over the years, but there's some I wouldn't let him watch. My 6 year came with us to see Thor last weekend, he loved it. Dr Who is far darker and scarier. The fighting was mainly gods and creatured thumping each other. There's a part where a creature gets a hole in it's head and you can see through, but it's like an empty shell, no blood, no brains, nothing squirts As a family we really enjoyed it, humour, fast paced story, lots of gods thumping each other, nothing gory.

Not sure if I'd use it as a party for 8 year olds tho, for the reasons others have said. When we went it was nearly all young adults who went, or a few parents with what looked around 10 yrs +, it didn't seem like the kind of crowd who'd appreciate someone coming in with many excitable younger kids on a birthday treat. Or maybe that's because we went to see it the weekend it came out, and all the comic book fans had rushed out to see it :)

I would, however, have been happy to have taken my eldest at 8 with a couple of his best friends. I know already what their parents let them watch, and it's easier to have a converstion about whether they were happy, if they weren't, we'd watch something else.

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