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Original poster

Hiding your children's favorite books and other bad parenting techniques

45 replies

BumptiousandBustly · 27/04/2011 07:46

I confess: I sometimes hide my children's favorite books, as I just can't, CAN'T cope with reading them again!

Please tell me the things you do that are "bad parenting" to make me feel better.

(NB I do return them eventually)

OP posts:
Reality · 27/04/2011 07:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pompoko · 27/04/2011 07:56

Dragging fav cuddly toy (simba) up the stairs by his tail to make stubborn toddler follow me up so I can put him to bed [cblush]. It worked though! [cgrin]

Conflugenglugen · 27/04/2011 08:01

I vacuum up the odd piece of Lego when I'm angry that they haven't put their toys away again and can't be bothered to pick them up. [cblush]

Original poster
BumptiousandBustly · 27/04/2011 08:02

We tell DS1 that Lemonade is Vodka - and thats why he can't have any (This is causing some problems though as he keeps telling people "Mummy and Daddy drink Vodka - I have juice!")

OP posts:
cantpooinpeace · 27/04/2011 08:03

Reality I used to do the double page trick too, they cotton on now :(

FriedEggyAndSlippery · 27/04/2011 08:05

Same here reality/cantpoo. I love reading bedtime stories but sometimes I am just too exhausted!

Original poster
BumptiousandBustly · 27/04/2011 08:07

In also used to do the double page thing, unfortunately DS1 now notices if we get a WORD wrong - so can't miss pages anymore

OP posts:
MardyBra · 27/04/2011 08:11

I told my kids that nursery rhyme CDs didn't work in the car.

FreudianSlipOnACrown · 27/04/2011 08:24

I have been told on more than one occasion

3yo DD: mummy watch this!
Me: I am watching
DD: no you're not, you're looking at your phone!

[cblush]

ilythia · 27/04/2011 09:14

mardy, I did that!
Also have a stash of bedtime story books down the back of DD1's bed which she found the other day, that was a loooong bedtime.
Have just told them that softplay is shut over the holidaysBlush

manfromCUK · 27/04/2011 09:18

@MardyBra
Brilliant - gutted that I didn't think of it!

Original poster
BumptiousandBustly · 27/04/2011 10:29

DS actually has no idea that the music system at home can play "boy songs" - He thinks they only work in the car!

OP posts:
MotherSnacker · 27/04/2011 10:53

my 2 year old got a really annoying singing dinosaur for xmas. I waited for him to get bored of it (2 weeks) and gave it to a charity shop.

kreecherlivesupstairs · 27/04/2011 11:01

It was ridiculously difficult to buy new batteries for a lot of DDs noisy toys. In fact, it was easier to regift throw them in the bin.
Poor DD she honestly believed that for a l-o-n-g time. She willingly put a super annoying mobile phone in the sink and filled it with water to 'revive' it. Sadly it never recovered Grin

SummerRain · 27/04/2011 11:02

I throw away plastic crap that people give them when they're out of the house and feign ignorance when they're looking for it. I go so far as to suggest places they may have left it.

Last week I chucked a plastic football boot money box that had come filled with chocolate (in my defense they were using it as a weapon and dd had a black eye from the damn thing). We were at swimming and ds1 found a coin and announced it was going in his football boot.... until dd piped up 'We'' I saw a football boot in the bin and it's not mine because mine is in my room' ..................... I blamed the baby Blush

monkeysausage · 27/04/2011 11:09

I tell DD that when the ice cream van plays music it means it has run out of ice cream.

rockinhippy · 27/04/2011 11:20

DD had one of those awful crying peeing baby dolls a few years ago - it was hideously irritating - I swapped the batteries for dead ones - & put dead ones in a new battery pack too as I knew she'd insist on changing them - she was very upset that her "baby had died" Blush not half as happy as I was though to find a reprieve from the hideous noiseGrin - that trick has worked well with quite a few toys over the yearsSmile

DH has done the same trick as you with hiding books Smile

& I spent the formative years of her life lying to her about all the crap over advertised "kiddy"Hmm food stuffs she spotted on TV, whatever character the advert used, I'd say "oh no, thats not human food, its Tony Tiger, or whatever else food, it makes people ill - she believed it for yearsGrin

Original poster
BumptiousandBustly · 28/04/2011 13:12

DS1 understands that batteries run out - and we never seem to have any new ones - Mummy always "forgets"

OP posts:
cantpooinpeace · 28/04/2011 13:18

My friend does the Peter Kay trick and tells her son that when the ice cream plays the music it means there's no ice-cream left........teehee

cantpooinpeace · 28/04/2011 13:18

Ice-cream van sorry

SybilBeddows · 28/04/2011 13:19

rofl re vodka Bumptious!

Original poster
BumptiousandBustly · 28/04/2011 13:31

Also in our town center there is one of those merry go round type things - if its standing still I tell DS1 that its not working - and if its going, well, he can't go on it because its already moving! Blush

OP posts:
MichaelaS · 28/04/2011 13:37

these are brilliant - i'm taking notes to hone my parenting skills!

I will admit to the 2 pages of the book thing. Also, my DS is keen on taking one book to each adult in the room and getting it read by different people - I think he is seeing if the words are the same from different adults. When we get bored of this, we make up additional bits of the story for the benefit of the other grown ups..... e.g. "Lawrence the lamb was SO pleased to be home and promised his mummy he would never leave the field alone again until the abbattoir van comes"

MsGee · 28/04/2011 13:38

I hide all annoying toys (plasticine, those stupid maize things) when I am sick of picking goo out of the carpet.

DD hates fruit so every cake I eat is fruit cake. Fruit also sometimes looks suspiciously like chocolate. But its fruit.

Rather than tell DD she can't have any toy she sees on tv, I told her that every birthday and Christmas is already planned till she is much older, like 24. She accepted this and we are now up to her 62nd birthday. She proudly tells people, "I get that when I 62".

I regularly throw out plastic toys, particularly the free ones with magazines.

DD also understands about batteries running about but they are fiendishly hard to get hold of and she may have to wait a long time before her toys make annoying sounds again.

The Dora book is regularly hidden. Its written so badly that I cringe whenever I read it.

The battery for the crying baby was removed as soon as she opened the present.

CinnabarRed · 28/04/2011 13:40

Another one who does the 2 pages at a time trick.

When DS1 doesn't want to go somewhere, I turn it into a race to get there because he just has to "be at front" so he can "do a winner". But it's backfiring because he's now megacompetitive and sulks if he can't beat absolutely everyone in a race.