AIBU?
Dog issues
Hatespinkcantcook · 26/04/2011 10:13
First timer so please be kind. Firstly I am a dog person and have a dog (small and old). I have a 5mth dc. Went to ILs over weekend and dh's sister and bil were staying there with their huge boisterous dog which has a tendency to nip and jump up. The upshot was they had a huge strop when asked by my dh to keep their dog away and put it in another part of the garden (we put our dog with it) they do not have children yet and just can't see the danger they say they can control it.
My worry is that pil don't seem to understand my worries and will not stand up to their daughter.They will be looking after dc one day a week when I go back to work and I am worried that they won't stand up to her when I am not there.
I am not anti-dog just dont want those that are not disciplined near my child. Have been made to feel neurotic and pfb about this. AIBU
owlmaster · 26/04/2011 10:22
Same situation here! No advice apart from to state your boundaries and ensure you and your partner agree and stick to them.
I am a long-term dog owner, LOVE dogs. Partner's family got a cute puppy, didn't train it, found it hilarious when puppy was cheeky and dominant. Ignored warnings that this wasn't to be encouraged. Puppy is now a 2yr old dog and they have every excuse for the inevitable behavioural issues the poor dog has. They won't listen to any advice (from friends / behaviourists / books etc.) The dog tries to bite every time we see it, they always have an excuse and won't face facts. I said to OH that while pg I do not want to be in the same room as the dog, it's too upsetting in many ways, and also we need to set boundaries now for when the baby arrives. There is no way I will allow myself to condone the situation by playing along. The dog is clearly not controlled by its owners - it ignores them, and snaps at anyone who tries to control it. It is clearly not happy :(
midori1999 · 26/04/2011 10:28
Maybe, as opposed to your PIL not 'standing up' to their daughter, they simply disagree with you about the dog?
I have four dogs (all well behaved) and wouldn't want someone else's large and boisterous dog jumping all over my baby either. However, I wouldn't expect to be able to control what people do with their dogs, whatever I may think, outside of my home or in the homes of others who didn't mind the behaviour either.
I think if you are not happy with this dog being around your DC and MIL won't agree the dog is better kept away from your DC, then you'll need to find alternative childcare.
Hatespinkcantcook · 26/04/2011 10:45
The ils do agree (I think) and I know I need to trust them to do the right thing when I am not there. They don't see their daughter very often as she lives three hours drive away which is why she brings the dog. In the past when they have disagreed with her they have not seen her for months. She can be lovely and I do want our daughter to have a relationship with her but she has a very strong personality and treats the dog like it's her child refusing to discipline it from a puppy (probably why it's so badly behaved). The dog can be sweet at times but will jump onto furniture etc and is very difficult to control. Has nipped numerous people.
ItsallabouttheBunnyBunnyBunny · 26/04/2011 10:46
Agree with Midori. If you're not 100% happy with every aspect of the childcare, find something that you are happy with.
FWIW, I agree with you about the dog, but it is possible that your inlays think you are being PFB about it, and don't understand why you want the dog out of the way.
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