to be creeping around...

[feedthegoat]

trying not to wake uo drunken dh who is snoring on sofa really loudly, because I want to go to bed and leave him there.

YADNBU. The alternative is having him snore in your bed!

YANBU. Hope it works and you'll get a nice and quiet night.

yanbu

Gently cover him with a blanket so the cold doesn't wake him!

Damn, the cat has just jumped on his knee and woke him up! He is clutching tv remote and Bee gees are currently on so hoping he'll be asleep again in minutes.

Aww I don't know.

On the few occasions I've got very drunk after a night out and fallen asleep on the couch, my DH guides me up the stairs, waits outside the toilet door til I do a wee, tucks me into bed and then goes and gets a glass of water and leaves it on the bedside cabinet.

Well this is what he claims...but how the hell do I know if I'm pissed?

Your DH sounds right lovely worra

But do you snore?

That's the crux of the matter here.

I did when I was pregnant with DD2, and I never had so much pleasure out of something I couldn't remember doing (getting my own back on mightily snoring DH)

Me? Snore? Worra fucking liberty!!

Yes I think I probably do but then so does he on occasion...except he's more likely to wake up with bruised ribs because of it

I do feel a bit mean worra but I have rotten insomnia at the best of times lately without one of dh's drunken snoring sessions. Can I not use this as a defence? he is back asleep by the way!

Lol well I can understand the snoring thing...as long as you're not being mean just because of the alcohol involved.

On the other hand, there's nothing wrong with being mean now and then....so I vote you cover him over with a blanket, tuck him up on the couch, kiss his forehead lovingly...and then tip a glass of water over his nuts so he wakes up and thinks he pissed himself.

This could get you muchos breakfast in bed and various other treats

Happy to help

not sure I want breakfast in bed enough to risk him waking up wet and joining me upstairs with his current noise levels!

I'm not being mean about alcohol either (even though I haven't been able to drink for over 6 months due to meds grr!). We've had a lovely day at a family easter party. My mum is currently in her spare bed too

'and then tip a glass of water over his nuts so he wakes up and thinks he pissed himself.'

Fucking hahahaha, please do this OP

The blanket will fend off any accusations of not caring for him.

If you he's not going to remember it, video the scene so you he can peruse it again and again at his sober leisure?

You could draw on the obligatory twirly moustache in permanent marker for his own good?

It's fine because everyone knows if you get yourself in that state you deserve anything that's going

DH says make sure the water's body temp so it doesn't wake him and chuck a warm pot noodle down his front so he thinks he's chundered too.

There's male solidarity for you!

I say enjoy having the bed to yourself

I don't think I could be that mean!

My mum and I once did the full make up thing to my dad though

My mum got an attack of guilt though and chased him down the drive the next morning though when she realised he was leaving for work having just smeared it round his face with a quick face wash!

I'm off to make a dash for it in a minute. Might even leave the beegees on for him

Definitely leave the Bee Gees on - apart from anything else, if he wakes up and doesn't realize where he is, he may attempt to pee on the stereo!

Sleep well

You could draw on the obligatory twirly moustache in permanent marker for his own good?

Oh let's not pussy foot around and opt for the penis along with round, hairy bollocks on his forehead

{wonders why my DH doesn't drink much....}

PMSL @ the pot noodle and pissing on the Bee Gees!!