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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think hospital treatment of pregnant women is pretty shit?

62 replies

TotorosOcarina · 21/04/2011 16:14

Am basing this on my 1st birth in hospital and my treatment today (I had 2 homebirths and midwives who work in the community seem much better than hospital consultants!)

Firstly rang 'community midwives office' this morning as wee had tested + for some stuff ystay and woke up th reaa bad back ache and was advised on MN to get checked out as UTI could have spread to kidneys apparantly.

So call them and really snotty woman told me I need to ring triage, totally unfriendly and abrupt (how am i supposed to know who to ring first?!)
so ring triage. they say see GP.

So go to GP who says todays sample is 'glowing and riddled with allsorts'

i tell her I'm in pain around my back, she takes BP - its low.

She takes pulse, its high.

SHE says I have to go hospital to get checked out.

So I go, I wait, am seen by nice midwife wh does trace.

Then consultant comes in ....

Why are you here, she says - i explain.

why did you ahve a scan yesterday - i tell her they couldn't tell abbies position.

she then tells me I'm not in labour (erm i never said i was)

she tells me the pain im having is not my kidneys.

im not registering cx on the trace.

and asks me again WHY im there vHmm

I then read my notes on way home and it says 'self refered from home' !!! - the bloody GP sent me!!

She made me feel like an idiot, like i was making the pain up - if it werent my kidneys and no cx - then why is my back absoloutly killing me on both sides?!

Just felt really stupid for doing as i was told by GP!

OP posts:
ForeverNamechanging · 21/04/2011 16:17

I have to say that during all three of my pregnancy i found the care i got to be superb. Sorry you had a bad experience but that a ridiculous sweeping statement

eggyminniewhingesagain · 21/04/2011 16:18

Sounds like they are a bit mad - you have symptoms that could well be a kidney infection - if you have low back pain and urine full of nasties - thats a kidney infection until proven otherwise.

Kidney infections can trigger early labour in some women, so getting checked at the ward is very sensible and your GP would have been wrong not to send you Confused

So are you on antibiotics?

Original poster
TotorosOcarina · 21/04/2011 16:24

Yes the GP gave me anti-biotics before sending me.

She seemed to think the pain was in the right area for my kidneys but the consultant just said 'no' and basically said im having braxton hicks.

That may be true of the small tightenings at the front but i have constant back ache and a ache in my sides that turns into a sharp one every so often.

It is my 4th child I know that im having pains

OP posts:
GypsyMoth · 21/04/2011 16:25

you're pregnant with back pain.....thats going to happen

what changes do you think should be made in the hospital then??Confused

ENormaSnob · 21/04/2011 16:32

Are you term?

If it's a kidney infection and you already have antibiotics then I don't see why you needed to be seen in hospital.

Tbh without seeing your notes I can't form an opinion either way.

madwomanintheattic · 21/04/2011 16:34

the gp did the right thing and gave you anti-b's as your sample indicated necessary.

think gp sent you for trace to check all was well with baby as you were experiencing pain - your uti or whatever had already been sorted (well, prescription anyway)

baby fine - no sign of labour. all good.

just a lack of communication as to why you were sent to the hospital i think.

so gp at fault for not explaining to you or hosp.

not a hosp issue (other than manner, which medically probably isn't going to make much difference other than pissing you off).

ninani · 21/04/2011 16:35

MIL has repeatedly told me that general hospital care and doctors attitude has GREATELY got worse. I don't remember anything of that nature when I was pregnant but I have been humiliated by the GP because I couldn't go to the bed for examination fast enough having horrible pain. She didn't lay a hand to help me move but was telling me to go faster and faster as if I was waisting her precious time. Another time she REFUSED to examine me when I had other symptoms claiming it was still the pregnancy hormones causing the problem.

Another woman I know had AWFUL pain, couldn't breathe properly let alone go to work or even the toilet and nobody could find anything wrong with her. Her GP reluctantly referred her to a speacialist and in his refferal letter he described her as a bit obsessive or paranoid who get too stressed!! Even the secreatary was patronising her.

I remember how many times MIL has told me that staff friendliness used to be the norm and now Angry

YANBU at all!

lockets · 21/04/2011 16:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LynetteScavo · 21/04/2011 16:39

TotorosOcarina, I totally agree with you.

Sadly in my experience (of my care and when I have accompanied pregnant friends to hospital )this type of thing is typical.

I do meet people who tell me their maternity care was fabulous, but I'm yet to experience it in a hospital for my self. Apart from the midwives who attended my home birth. They were truly, utterly fantastic.

Maybe the GP was being cautious, and wanted to make sure you didn't need IV antibiotics? I went straight on to TotorosOcarina IV anti-B's when I had a kidney infection. After being sent home form one hospital, even though I couldn't sleep ans could barely walk. Hmm

ninani · 21/04/2011 16:40

Even if the consultant had a different opinion from the GP she could have behaved with proper manners. I hope she is right about her diagnosis.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 21/04/2011 16:45

That's really dismissive and rude, OP, I would have been upset as well. Can somebody go with you just to be a support next time? Some doctors and consultants think they are god-like when they're barely adequate. Qualifications aren't everything, without a polite bedside manner and an ability to effectively communicate with their patient, they don't really count.

Can you see somebody else perhaps? I'd make a point of explaining why I felt that way too. Hmm

Hope you feel better soon. :)

new2cm · 21/04/2011 16:49

I had excellent care for all three of my pregnancies and births.

However, I have stopped saying this because of an aquaintance, who upon Reading my birth stories was so impressed that she booked herself into the same hospital. This aquaintance had an awful experience and I felt bad because of that.

So I will say that YANBU despite my wonderful experiences. I listen to other women's experiences and think 'hly sht, you have had it bad' and thank my lucky stars that I was so lucky, not once but three times!

AngryGnome · 21/04/2011 16:58

I hate the "self referred" thing. At a routine midwife appt, she said i tested positive for protein, and had to go straight to hospital, and that I wouldn't becoming home without my baby. Cue me in blubbering tears (bleddy hormones!), calmed myself down, straight to labour ward as MW advised, only to be asked why had I come, they were very busy etc, couldn't deal with all pregnant women who had the jitters and thought they were in labour! They also wrote on my notes that i self referred. Grrr!

When i actually did go in to have my baby the level of care was shocking. i was in for 2 weeks so saw pretty much every miwife at one point or another - 2 of them were absolutely excellent, the rest absolutely appalling, 2 to the point of negligence. One MW referred to me as "the one who makes a fuss". this is because i cried when they were putting in my epidural (5 attempts to put it in). Considering i had a 22 hour labour, with a failed forceps, c section, complications which have left me with mobility problems 5 months on and permanent nerve damage, and a baby left with permanent scarring due to mistakes made during forceps attempt....yep, i think even if i had made a fuss it would have been justified! I cannot think of any other groups of patients who would be treated so badly.

sorry, rant over. I feel quite strongly about this, as you may have guessed.

LynetteScavo · 21/04/2011 17:06

Although I did have one lovely, very young, doctor give me a hug after a miscarriage.

ddubsgirl · 21/04/2011 17:18

sounds like kidney infection,i had bad 1 with my twins,knew it wasnt labour but doc told me to go to hospital but couldnt cos the maternity ward was closed,ended up in worthing hospital to be told if it was labour i would have to go to haywards heath as they had no space in the scbu,dh had just lost his job so no money,had to get his uncle to drive us spent 4 days in worthing who were all lovely,i had the tightenings and bad backache,fever,weeing alot etc which was told well your pregnant!i hate it when people say that,yes your pregnant but you know when something doesnt feel right.

6 weeks after having twins i had to have appendix out,was told i was really lucky it didnt go when i was pregnant,i kept getting this pain on right side but told your pregnant,you get pains,had same pain when having ds2,was the pressure from the babies that made it go and 3rd c-section,go back to GP IF PAIN DOESNT EASE OFF xxxx

saffy85 · 21/04/2011 17:23

Agreed. Clinic I was at yesterday ran over 2 hours behind due to consultant's "5 minute meeting" at 9am. When he eventually strolled in at 11.30 he didn't utter one word of apology to anyone, not midwives (who were lovely, running round fetching extra chairs and drinks for everyone) or any of the patients, one of whom had been waiting there since 9am. Angry Even the midwives were visably raging.

OP I'm sorry they made you feel like an idiot that was totally unfair and FWIW my sister has had nasty kidney infections with both her pregnancies and needed admitting to hospital. Both times started with the symptons you had.

mosschops30 · 21/04/2011 17:27

Ooh i could tell you things about my treatment in hospital tht would mke your eyes water Sad
i dont think what happened today is too bad in the great scheme of things.

NestaFiesta · 21/04/2011 17:30

YANBU. When I leaked fluid after an amnio a stupid doctor in Gynae did a swab and:

Didn't tell me what she was going to do
Didn't tell me why
Didn't tell me if the baby was OK
Didn't tell me what she was swabbing for
Didnd't tell me where she was sending it
Didn't tell me when the results would be back
Didn't reassure me
Didn't use my name at all

Referred to my vagina as a "front passage" I half expected her to find a bike and umbrella up there!

Luckily I bumped into my consulatnt at a vague follow up arranged by above doc and he took over and was fab. Baby is now 17 months old and fine. Bike still in front passage along with an old parcel and house keys.

Original poster
TotorosOcarina · 21/04/2011 17:34

who ever said 'back pain is going to happen'

this is my 4th pregnancy, i have had back pain throughout, SPD and seen physios over my back, this is not NORMAL pregnnacy back pain.

I still believe its my kidneys and am hoping it will quit once the antibiotics kick in.

OP posts:
ddubsgirl · 21/04/2011 17:36

drink plenty Totoros if you can cranberry juice too,hope you feel better soon xxx

GypsyMoth · 21/04/2011 17:40

well of course it will,the anti biotics were given for that reason!!!

i said back pain will happen....

i've had 5 dc. hospital care was excellent with all 5 and in 5 different parts of the country with each one.

Original poster
TotorosOcarina · 21/04/2011 17:44

well no tiff because the consultant said she didn't think the back pain was infection related! thats what im tryin g to say.

she dismissed the back pain as infection pain and as labour pain so basically told me i wasn't feeling any pain.

and queried why i was given anti-biotics by the GP dispite my pee being full of nasties and me having pain consistant with a UTI.

OP posts:
jeckadeck · 21/04/2011 17:45

consultants are always up their own arses. It goes with the territory.

GypsyMoth · 21/04/2011 17:46

so what do you think then?

have you pulled it? lifted anything? how many weeks are you

lockets · 21/04/2011 17:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.