to be a bit miffed at the acceptancy of sexualised bhaviour and language by very small children, or am I just a prude?

[itsabiggywhatdoidonow]

I notice a fair bit that at least one of my friends and have noticed this from strangers and other parents I have mixed with, accepts and even laughs at silly behaviour and talk of a sexual nature from young dcs.

2 examples of this. At a community activity thing a registared care providers member of staff sat along side the children in her care whilst they dicussed her having a sexy body and kissing herself. that they were going to kiss her sexy bum and kiss each others fannies. these children were aged 7 to 8 and was a group of some boys and girls. This went on for about half hour untill, I asked if she was actualy going to tollerate this, as my self and my small child didnt want to hear that kind of talk.

my dc does come out with her fair share of toilet talk, that is normal, and sometimes ignored but never in public when she should be engaging with others or meaningfull activity. But I do mostly nip it in the bud.

I have friend whos dd age 5 almost always acts in quite an overtly sexual or inappropriate manner with men even if she does not know them well, this girl was at my house today when my brother poped in. she has never met him before and she legged it to the front door and was just stood there staring at him, he was wearing shorts and as soon as he stepped in the door she wrapped herself around his leg and was stroking the back of his thigh. I prized her off and told her to go and sit down and stop being silly and she was giggling,"but I love him" y brother was bit shocked at her behaviour. he sat down and I went and put kettle on, she then jumped on his knee and straddled him stroking his hair, he got up and joined me in the kitcken. when he told me I sent her to play in garden with my dd. On the way past she kicked him hard in the balls and shouted, haha I kicked you in the balls. So I sat her on my stairs.

her mums response was just "little maddam". Now my dd would never behave like this if she did I would not tollerate it and tell her it is wrong.

I have winessed her, infront of her mum act in a similar way and worse. She once stroked a male family friends groin, and regularly kicks her dad and other men in the balls. she strips off all the time and talks openly about her "penny". I have seen her parents laugh about these things or just ignore, but never told this is wrong.

Now am I just a prude or over catiouse, not in anyway a pedo on every corner, but in viewing and setting personal bounderies at an early age goes as far as helping children understand personal safety and safeguarding what is appropriate and inapropriate contact.

talking in the playground is onething but they were talking about an adult sitting alongside them, who could clearly hear them though surely she should have interviened?

think I may just be homing on things now I have bee in my bonnet about this.

Oh right I didn't get that! Maybe she wasn't listening

OP - my OH left his family (not many excuses except very young) and a stepfather moved in.

He went back to visit when his DD was about 7 and she behaved like this towards him. 20 years later the stepfather was taken to court and imprisoned for sexually abusing DD and other young girls.

It is one of the strongest warning signs there is. Report, report, report!

Please report that photo.

Report that photo asap.

What photo?

WRT your OP:

First anecdote? Not appropriate, but normal to some extent for children to explore that kind of language. Should have been told straight away that it was wrong to talk like that to the teacher.

Second anecdote? Alarm bells. :(

that is very sad mandy

have messaged the woman on facebook and let her know although inoccent this picture maybe, it realy isnt good idea to post on fb.

OP, agree with the other posters, that does not sound like normal behaviour for a 5 year old, she might have been exposed to some sort of sexual behaviour. It won't do any harm to report it.

On a side note, I have a 5 year old DD and I'm finding it a struggle to protect her from the constant barrage of sex in the media. As an example, DD loves pop music (particularly JLS [cconfused]) and insists on having radio 1 on in the car in case they're on. There are so many songs out a the moment that I would really rather she isn't singing along to (Rihanna, Katy Perry, Snoop Dog... etc). I hope she grows up to realise that there are much more important things in life than looking like a porn star and being a highly skilled and willing shag, popular culture is against me!

my dd is the same seymore, luckily at the moment most of it goes over her head or she fills in the lyrics with what she thinks they are, katy perry california girls is about as offensive as it gets, she hasnt grasped the lyrics yet.

I wont report this or take it further, although I do not know as fact, my concerns arent that she is exposed to any abuse, my instinct and obseration is, she is not being taught appropriate bounderies and her parents give her a reaction to encourage and not disuade this behaviour.

from my own upbringing and personal experience I think its important to teach children what is right and what is wrong regarding sexual behaviour, therefor having maybe some confidence to be physically and verbaly assertive in safeguarding themselfs and reporting to an adult. I do think however the lack of sensible bounderies and an inability to regulate this behaviour may sadly leaver her more vulnerable in comparison to another child who has a clearer understanding of appropriate contact.

at 5 my dd has some awareness of what abuse could be, who may abuse and how to report it, some people may also find this tmi for a small child.