to think it's weird

[ItsGrimUpNorth]

that there is not one single photograph of me with my children at mil's house but literally hundreds of them and loads of them with her and fil on every surface in their house and in albums? There is one of her daughter with her two eldest too in a photo cube but that's it.

It's like the parents have been edited out. There's a tiny one of dh with my eldest two as part of a collage but generally, it's like we don't exist as their parents.

I'm tempted to send them a beautiful professional portrait of me, dh and my dcs.

"There is one of her daughter with her two eldest too in a photo cube but that's it"

Maybe SIL gave them that cube with the photo in as she had noticed the same.

It's very common. My MIL does not have pictures of me, either.

People, especially grandparents, like photos of the children - they don't want the adults in them. They aren't editing you out!

I have photos of my nieces/nephews/godchildren/friends kids - but not a single photo of an adult except one of me with my nephew when he was a very new newborn.

Have you given them photos of you? Maybe they'd put one up if you sent them one.

It's not weird...she loves the children not you! Well...she MAY love you in a grudging MILkind of way but the GC are what matter really. My Mother only has her grandchildren on the wall...her OWN kids are nowhere!

My mom pointed out to me recently that I had no pics of her in the house. My kids, my nieces etc but not her

I have rectified that :o

My MIL has pictures of her oldest son, his GF and their DSs on one wall. Other wall has pictures of her youngest son and his GF.

No pictures of me or DH - her middle son.
Not even a wedding picture - because we didn't get married 'properly' just at a registry office (without loads of random relatives) it doesn't seem to count

It's weird op. My mil is the same. I know she'd like the children to be hers because she told me and dh so. That's why there are no photos of us, only thousands of our children and her other gcs. She prefers it that way. Unfortunately for her, we do exist.

As for photos in my house, I have a nice even balance of relatives showing. Because that's erm, normal.

LOL v funny, yes the PIL have lots of DS their only grandchild but not with us and the only photo of us (DH and me) is a wedding one that appeared about 3 years after we got married!!!
Mind you my parents are just as bad, the place is now a shrine to our DS on every available surface. Oh well. Maybe I will be the same one day when I'm an annoying MIL

I'd HATE there to be photos of me all over someone else's house. In fact I'd hate them in my house too. I think you should be grateful!

Oh I don't want photos of me all over the house. That's not the point.

I just get a bit unnerved by the sheer volume of photos of my dcs and mil's other grandchildren. There are literally hundreds and hundreds. The house is like a shrine to them. It strikes me as obsessive and I don't really like to think of anyone obsessed with my children.

And the fact that dh and I, as their parents, are completely unacknowledged.

I dont see that it is weird at all. Its natural for grandparents to proudly display photos of their grandchildren.

We get given regular photos of our granddaughter by her parents.

My MIL has dozens of photos, of her grandchildren, and great grandchildren.

I cab understand what you mean. I find some gp's obsession with their gc's very odd - they are not their children FFS! I can categorically say that, even though I will love my gc's very much I will not be like that and I will acknowledge and respect the parents as the parents!

It's normal. Don't worry about it.

MIL has one of me as a bride on her mantelpiece. It's huuuuuuge.

No other photos.

Creepy old mare.

Well, they could if they behaved normally.

My parents have no photos of dh. Loads of me and the dc. MIL have dh, his sisters and all the gcs. It's not weird.

Do you have any photos of your PILs on display in your house OP?

Yep. Of both sets of gps and also of uncles, aunts and cousins. We talk about my dcs relatives a lot.

Then I think you should definately get a nice family photo done of you, DH and the DC and give them a copy in a nice frame

I wasn't being snotty btw when I asked. I just can't think of anyone I'd like less staring down from my mantelpiece than my inlaws. And judging by the lack of photos of me in their house I'm guessing the feeling is mutual. Hell, I've even been cut out of the only one they had of DD, DP and myself...

Right. This thread has made me feel like being nice to my MIL. I'm going to put the photo I took of her and DS on facebook. The one where she standing up straight - not the one where she's bending over him and inadvertantly showing off rather too much chest.