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AIBU?

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Neighbours kids broken my fences confronted father today and he wont talk about it...RANT and advise needed too

38 replies

Emmz0 · 17/04/2011 02:22

For last 2 years i have been putting up with neighbours (one side )who think its okay to play football in the back garden with a heavy football to the point they have caused massive holes in our fence and bent them. To add to this, the father thinks its okay for them to give themselves permission to climb over fences and retrieve ball.

On several occasions I told the kids to stop climbing over our fences to retrieve ball as they were damaging them.Sometimes they did listen and rang our doorbell to ask for the ball. I told them i would rather have them ring our doorbell then climb over our fences. To add to this, father on many ocassions used to lift kids up to climb onto and over our fences.

I nicely tried to have words with him about our fences being damaged and he said he would pay for damages when the time came. I told him the point was not to damage them in the first place etc by climbing over fence kicking with a heavy football. note this is a newbuild house we are talking about so this is not the place to play football as you just manage to stretch your legs out in the tiny patch of garden. They managed to squash in a massive goalkeeper football net.

Anyway, once i saw the kids using a trampoline to jump over our fence and this time i had a word with mum being polite as i could telling them not to climb over fence and she said don't worry thats why we bought a trampoline so the kids could jump over the fence not to disturb you!!!!!!!!!! do these people think they own the street or something???? am i being unreasonable on this to expect neighbours not to trespass my property boundaries. she started getting angry over this like it was her property i tried to be calm and told her its not safe for a kid to use a trampoline to jump into my garden.

The final straw is today i saw the neighbour bringing in new fences. note, their side of fences, the ones they own are so damaged - they don't even need to climb over their neighbours fences to get ball they walk through!
I said to the neighbour: new fences hey, any for us? he said no. I said what about fences for us to replace the ones your kids have damaged. he said what they are 12 year old fences......this is what has really pissed me off. its his kids climbing over and hitting haeavy football that have caused the fences to be this way not the fact they are 12 years old.note i only have one kid just recently who is 2 months old so we are definately not damaging our own fences in anyway. so i said can we talk about this and he said no. I tried to talk again and he said he didnt want to talk any further. because i had to go somewhere else i didnt pursue this matter further but im really annoyed and upset when i know that this is down to his kids and him and his wife.

to add to this our house has two parking spaces at the front clearly labelled each one with our house number and grid painted so it can clearly be identified whose parking space is who. They have one parking space in front of the house and one round the corner. They keep allowing their guests, builders etc to park in one of our parking spaces without taking our permission. and i've even seen them direct anyone in our space, why cant they direct their guests into their free parking space few seconds round the corner? when i nicely asked the builder to remove his van from my parking space he said he would only be a couple of hours. i politely told him i understand but this is my parking space not my neighbours after which he moved it and both my neighbour and their builder looked at me funny as if i was in the wrong. she never even asked my permission- if she had maybe i would have said no problem.

Please let me know if im being unreasonable on any of this and why?

And advice about what to do about fences matter? Do i try and speak to them further, what to say do etc.

OP posts:
MadameOvary · 17/04/2011 11:32

Get a massive fuck-off brick wall built.
Next time you see them say:
"Oh yes, we are considering a dog and don't want him trespassing into your gardens"
And smile sweetly.

thederkinsdame · 17/04/2011 13:59

I'd ask the parents to come over one evening to see if you could talk abou tit amicably. If that didn't stop it, I'd get the police involved and ask the local community officer to have a wee chat with them about boundaries and criminal damage.

If they still don't get the message, for the parking, I'd put up a sign on the space and buy a clamp, like the ones you can get for caravans and clamp anyone in your space then charge them £100 to release them. Grin

I would also put prick-a strip on top of the fences, or put up a high trellis to stop them climbing over. I'd keep any thing that came over and tell them they can't have it back until they come and ask properly.

GiddyPickle · 17/04/2011 15:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Emmz0 · 18/04/2011 15:07

just found out that they are moving - they pretended to be spring cleaning! now i see why he wont cough up for damaged fences because he's doing a runner

OP posts:
Milliways · 18/04/2011 15:24

The Estate Agents won't like them having holes, and you could mutter about "Neighbour disputes" which would scare buyers, so they may sort them?

We too use the huge dog method. Old neighbours soon learned not to climb the fence when 7 stone dog had free access to a dog flap. and he ate the balls.

Fence between us fell down (football abuse) as they did a midnight flit, and we let our dog roam into their garden until the agent replaced it as couldn't sell for the Mortgage COmpany (re-possession).

TiggyD · 18/04/2011 15:29

I think Milliways has got it right. I think you have to declare disputes with neighbours now. Start one and only drop it when you get a new fence.

CheshireDing · 18/04/2011 17:49

Although if you mention dispute it could be harder for them to sell the house (if they own it) and therefore you could be stuck with them for longer.

If they rent I would report it to the landlord, if they own the house you need to check your title deeds. Usually any terrace/semi will have to share joint and equal responsibility to maintain the boundary walls and fences. If the houses are detached the deeds should say who is responsible for each fence.

trixie123 · 18/04/2011 19:27

it is true that you now have to inform potential buyers if you are in an official dispute with your neighbours so you could tell him that unless he resolves the fence issue you will be instructing a solicitor to write a letter to him about it, thereby starting the official dispute and send a copy to his estate agent so they can't claim ignorance. The parking thing I would not worry about if they are moving, just make it clear to the new owners that it is yours right from the word go.

giveitago · 18/04/2011 19:48

OP - if you have a allocoted parking and a new build, does that mean you're in a leasehold property? If so, the've broken the terms of the lease and get the landlords involved - now.

If not - start cultivating huge trees in your garden - can you afford a new fence - if not then arguing the toss with them is going to be difficult.

woollyideas · 18/04/2011 20:06

If I were you I'd just be very, very glad that they're moving. Starting a dispute may well delay their move and is that what you really want?

I sympathise. I live next door to a woman who has trespassed in my garden many times and done far, far worse things to me and my family. Won't go into the ins and outs because it'll play havoc with my blood pressure! If she moved out it would be the best thing that could happen. I know the urge for revenge fairplay/payment for your fence is probably strong, but truthfully I'd just breathe a sigh of relief that they're going.

I hope your next neighbours are nicer.

GnomeDePlume · 18/04/2011 20:21

My preferred method of getting neighbourhood kids off my garden is to bellow at full volume 'Oi! You! get out of my garden now!'. Worked a treat last night, had them scuttling off in all directions!

Mind you, I used to work as a life-guard and my early morning yell lifts DS bodily from his bed!

MaisyMooCow · 18/04/2011 20:32

Gnome Grin

I do that with our neighbourhood kids too, they scuttle off like rats!

GnomeDePlume · 18/04/2011 21:40

Very satisfying, Maisy!

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