To think this is my fault

[kazza113]

My dd is 12 years old and is a good girl. She works hard at school and causes me no problems at all BUT, she has very few friends and doesn't seem to have any confidence around her peers. She really wants to have close friends but only really has one and she picks my daughter up and drops her when it suits her. I really worry that this is my fault because I only have one friend and my sister and mum that I see. It breaks my heart to see her being upset and the phone never ringing or anyone asking her to go out. Is this my fault. Has anybody got kids in a similar situation. It seems from looking at her facebook that all the other kids seem to have a full social life and lots of interaction and confidence. Your advice and help would be gratefully received.

It's not your fault, your dd is an individual with her own personality, and not everything she does is down to you

How upset does she get about this? Is she fairly happy not being part of the 'in crowd'? I know how you feel, although it's different because my ds is younder and has aspergers. It used to break my heart knowing that he didn't really have any friends and that he never got invited anywhere, and it took me a while to realise that he was actually quite happy that way, and if he wanted to be around others enough he could find a way to do it.

I think as long as your dd knows she is valued for who she is and that you think she is a beautiful person inside and out, she will be fine.

I only have one friend that I knew when I was 12, I'm sure that's the same for lots of people. Maybe your dd will just be one to form meaningful friendships rather than superficial ones.