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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to be irritated by the cheek of a slow payer on Ebay?

15 replies

NestaFiesta · 11/04/2011 16:38

Tried putting this on the ebay section to no avail- there's more traffic here.

I sold a top on ebay on 6th April and unusually, received good and effusive feedback from the buyer before she had paid or received the item. I sent a friendly note thanking her and saying I was looking forward to sending the item on reciept of payment.

Four days later I had heard nothing so sent an invoice and a friendly note. Earlier today, I sent another note saying that my unpaid item assistant kicks in at 8 days and that I always prefer to resolve things amicably. I asked what she wanted to do and if she still wanted the item.

She then replied and said she is paying me on Friday and sent about 8 "xxxx" kisses. I am really irritated by this as it would be 9 days after the item ended and took me 3 attempts to get a reply. I want to tell her that if she didn't have the money she shouldn't be bidding. I am also irritated that sellers can only ever leave positive feedback for annoying buyers, yet buyers can say what they like about sellers.

I sent her a note back saying I usually like payment within 3 days and 9 days is a long time . She replied saying her cheque doesn't clear until then! Not my problem!

I have had a glut of slow or non payers lately and I could really have done with the money this week when I am skint.

What would you do in my position? AIBU to want to tell her she can't have it and re-list it in a fit of pique?

OP posts:

LilQueenie · 11/04/2011 16:59

open a dispute against her then if she doesnt pay relist but not until the dispute has ended.

I give 4 days to pay then start a dispute without warning. I state 4 days in the main text so if they dont read it then its their problem.

pigletmania · 11/04/2011 17:01

I would Tell her that you are relishing the item as it hasent been paid for and in future she should only bid if she has money

squeakytoy · 11/04/2011 17:03

I had a weird thing happen last week. Sold something, and payment didnt show up, left it a couple of days, still no emails or contact. Finally sent the buyer a reminder. She said she had paid immediately auction ended.

I checked on paypal, and she had, but there was no confirmation from paypal about it sent to me, nor was the payment showing on the item.

Very odd.

catchmeifyoucan · 11/04/2011 17:06

If you don't mind losing your fees open a dispute - the one where you say you sold an item and wish to cancel the transaction. The buyer will probably then decline but you can close the case, block the bidder and relist. You'll lose your fees but if it's not much it's worth it!

FabbyChic · 11/04/2011 17:09

If your buyer refuses to cancel the transaction you are still liable for the final value fees, plus she can still leave you a neg or neutral.

Bad form to send a mutual withdrawal specially when she has indicated she is going to pay.

Original poster

NestaFiesta · 11/04/2011 17:15

Fabby- but isn't it bad form of her to not pay and only reply after 3 attempts that she will pay when she has the money? It's very bad ebay etiquette to bid for something you can't pay for.

Squeaky- thanks. She has definitely not paid but that's weird about what happened in your case!

piglet and lilQueenie- that's my attitude too! If you can't pay don't bid.

OP posts:

pigletmania · 11/04/2011 17:52

I always state that in my listing in bright red underscore letters.

peanutbutterkid · 11/04/2011 17:58

Did you prominently write as one of your auction conditions that you expect payment within 3 days? If not, than yabu.
Although I never know how reasonable Ebay thinks those sorts of conditions are. I avoid auctions like a plague that have that sort of notice, tbh, I don't need the stress of it if real life should intervene.

YouaretooniceNOT · 11/04/2011 18:10

squeakytoy i was the buyer on Ebay and paid for an item but the seller didn't receive the payment for a few days after it had left my bank account (the instant i pressed confirm transaction on paypal).. The transaction was being processed. Not happened since and didn't understand why it had. Seller did accuse me of not paying too. Was amicably sorted out though.

pigletmania · 11/04/2011 18:40

peanutbutter people put those conditions on as they have been messed around in the past, if you dont like it dont bid, but plenty of people dont mind and i have had no problems as a result of putting conditions up. I am sure that if you had a problem and messaged the seller they would be more than happy to help you. This happened to me of a late payer, turns out she had to be rushed to hospital. I was totally understanding and allowed her to pay when she was able to. I am a pretty reasonable person, I know emergencies happen and would be totally understanding. I just dont want to be messed about because someone hasent got the money to pay me, that wouldent happen in a shop would it!

FutureNannyOgg · 11/04/2011 18:56

Iirc eBay states payment is due in 7 days so yanbu

Original poster

NestaFiesta · 11/04/2011 19:20

Piglet- you're quite right. If my buyer had contacted me to say something had come up unexpectedly and she couldn't pay straight away I wouldn't have minded so much. It was just the fact she only replied to my third friendly prompt and then said "I'm paying Friday" as if I was supposed to guess. In fact, I am doubtful about that as she said a cheque is due to clear then, which doesn't suggest her Paypal account will have the money then.

I've checked my settings and listings and it looks like I don't state that payment is due in three days so this may be partially my fault, but I also think it's a real cheek to "reserve" an item in this way until you can pay for it.

NannyOgg- thanks for clarifying that. I always thought it was three days but I am still annoyed with her for making it 9 days!

OP posts:

peanutbutterkid · 11/04/2011 19:21

Link FutureNannyOgg?

If an emergency is happening in my life the last thing I'm going to be bothered about is to check my emails to see if I won an Ebay auction in the last 3 days. I imagine I'm not the only buyer put off.

mrsjaja · 11/04/2011 19:31

On the other foot - i purchased two items on e-bay (a yankee candle shade and tray) for my mum for mothers day. Received a despatch notice for the shade but not the tray - they were separate items - only to be told buy the seller that the tray was not due back in stock for another 10 days . Think its wrong to sell stuff you dont even have in your possession!!!

I would be miffed as well OP, as i always pay straight away.

pigletmania · 11/04/2011 21:13

peanutbutter I am sure that anyone conditions or not would be miffed at not being paid, how are they to know you have an emergency and your not just taking the pee. Yes I know emergencies happen, I was actually contacted by the ladys mother to say she was in hospital and of course was totally understanding.

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