MIL is not a baby person, has said so herself, but she absolutely dotes on DS - 9mo. She has been a primary school teacher for over 30 years - several of my friends have been taught by her and they all remember her as being very strict and no-nonsense - but a great teacher. She was also v strict with DP who ended up going off the rails as a teenager in rebellion against all the control she was trying to exert over him (though he's well past that now and is a v sensible 30 year old!).
As a result, most of her interactions with DS involve her telling him not to do things (mostly putting toys in his mouth/grabbing ornaments off low tables) and though I know she's not being horrible to him, I wish she would realise that telling a teething baby not to put a toy you've just given him in his mouth is a bit pointless as he's far too young to understand! Yesterday at lunch she was telling him "no, DGS, that's not for eating" - it was a wrist rattle and he kept pulling it off his wrist to chew on - which must have been about the 10th time in an hour and I jokingly said "I don't think he's read the instructions". Cue catsbumface and look of offended horror from MIL - though the rest of the guests all laughed, as it was intended to be a lighthearted comment from me and I thought delivered in a gentle tone.
I'm not going to be the most laid back mother in the world as I'm v similar to MIL in many ways, but I do think that we should just be enjoying DS while he is small, understand that he's at a stage where he's going to be putting everything in his mouth and being very curious about small, interesting objects (a gazillion ornaments in their house on very delicate, tottery tables!) and not be telling him not to do things/taking toys away all the time, other than if it's something actually dangerous.
How can I manage to get her to chill out about him without upsetting her? Even my mum has noticed it and said that PIL seem to treat DS as though he is a mischievous 4 year old, with the expectation that he can be reasoned with! He's only a wee nipper and can just about understand a loud "NO!" if he's about to do something dangerous and I can't get to him fast enough.
Or do I need to chill out, let her get on with it and just have a few more glasses of wine at Sunday lunch?! Pick my battles and all that - I imagine his terrible twos will be a challenging time for MIL!