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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

In thinking that imitation is not the sincerest form of flattery...

26 replies

WhatTheActualFuck · 11/04/2011 12:12

...and it's actually really fucking annoying?

I got my hair cut last week. Not big news, granted, but it was a fairly radical change for me as I've had mid-length hair for several years now and had it cut into short graduated bob (very short at the back, slightly longer at the front, blunt fringe). Not exactly cutting edge but I love it and have had many complimentary comments about it from colleagues and friends.

Then, this morning...

Colleague who sits opposite me comes into work and she's only gone and got the same fucking haircut as me. I mean exact same. Identical. I hadn't mentioned it because I'm a bit Hmm but she's just said (very loudly) 'well, d'ya like my haircut?'

I wanted to say: Of course I like your fucking haircut! I like it a whole lot better on me though! But, in the interests of office harmony, I just kind of smiled ( through gritted teeth) and made the expected 'lovely' type noises and vowed to bitch about it on MN instead.

So, AIBU? Is imitation the sincerest form of flattery and I should just get over myself. Or (as i suspect) does it just demonstrate a spectacular lack of imagination on the part of the imitator?

OP posts:
ShirleyKnot · 11/04/2011 12:13

But bobs are everywhere at the moment - they are very fashionable

I like your name BTW!

pinkytheshrinky · 11/04/2011 12:16

No no I feel your pain - I have a stalker who copies all my clothes... fucking weird. Even her children are looking like mine. She has said to me before how much she 'looks up to' me but it bloody freaks me out. I have mentioned loudly that I am not impressed but it makes fuck all difference she smiles and carries on being my mini me................... ahahahahahaahhhhaahhh

cuteboots · 11/04/2011 13:53

goes to back to my post last week where our marketing lady and boss dress the same! Very bloody odd.

ashamedandconfused · 11/04/2011 13:55

oo-er pinky, thats very odd

tethersegg · 11/04/2011 13:56

Do a

FoofffyShmoofffer · 11/04/2011 13:59

Unfortunately, you have very little choice but to put up with it.

We had friends who came into our newly decorated living room and didn't say a damned word about it. Within 3 months theirs was the same. Colour, layout the lot.

Styles of hair, clothes, decor etc are universal and we can't stop other people from having the same but you would hope that they would have the good grace to compliment yours before going out and doing the same.

MadamDeathstare · 11/04/2011 14:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ENormaSnob · 11/04/2011 14:44

Yadnbu

I have had a few friends do similar. With clothes, hair, house stuff and even kids clothes Hmm

I don't like it at all tbh.

tethersegg · 11/04/2011 14:44

Wear it in bunches and see if she does the same.

AgentZigzag · 11/04/2011 14:48

I like your name too Grin

A couple of years after I'd split up with this bloke I saw him down the pub and he'd had a sex change (not sure if that's the accepted term to use these days?)

He looked the spit of what I used to look like when I'd lived with him (same hair/clothes/make up), he'd even changed his name to mine with the same unusual spelling.

I was told I should take it as a compliment but actually found it a bit creepy.

EllenJane1 · 11/04/2011 14:54

AgentZigzag, That's really creepy. Shock

worraliberty · 11/04/2011 14:57

Fucking hell Zigzag that's just more than creepy Shock

Is it wrong to laugh? Cos I did....sorry Blush

AgentZigzag · 11/04/2011 15:05

Thanks for saying you think it's creepy too, it was a few years ago now and I've always wondered WTF? Grin

It was the mixing up of stuff I wasn't keen on, like what was he thinking when we were together Confused

Anybody can dress how they like, but it was the name that got me, he didn't move and still socialised with people we both knew so they knew it was my name.

Defo not wrong to laugh, just imagine me bumping into a younger me down the pub and it's nothing but a ridiculous scenario Grin

ENormaSnob · 11/04/2011 15:07

Agentzigzag, that is seriously creepy.

Did he exhibit signs of being not quite normal when you were together?

doley · 11/04/2011 15:13

I am always being copied .

That is one thing ,more annoying is that before they go and get the same ...hair ...curtains, color scheme or whatever ....they have normally bitched about my choice Confused

AgentZigzag · 11/04/2011 15:16

Sorry hijacking your thread OP Blush

He was a bit 'unusual' norma, but that's why I liked him. He didn't give me any signs I could pick up on (at 19/20 YO) he felt as extreme as that.

I still think of him as a bloke rightly or wrongly, because that's the person I knew.

stressheaderic · 11/04/2011 15:22

Wow, AgentZZ, that's bigtime creepy.

My friend has the same pushchair as me. It's quite a distinctive stand-outy kind of one and I got it last year and love it. She got it at Xmas but asked me first if I'd mind, to which I said no (but thought 'yes').
We meet up a few times a week with our same-age DDs in pushchairs. Lots of people always say "oh they look like twins in the same pushchairs like that" and I can hear my inner child saying "but I got it fiiiirst" in a sing-songy voice. I'm know, I'm pathetic.

bulletinthehead · 11/04/2011 16:36

Is it the same colour as yours op?

Original poster
WhatTheActualFuck · 11/04/2011 17:53

Hijack away, AgentZ! I'm aghast at your tale...and a little envious that mine is so pedestrian in comparison Grin

Bullet, she hasn't quite gone for the same colour but not far off. Mine is darker (am naturally very dark) and glossier and more lustrous Perhaps I now need to go blond to set us apart.

Loving MadamDeathStare's suggestion...am going to see if I can hijack one of the window cleaner's pulley doodahs and do a tour of all the windows of the building to make sure mine is seen by all and sundry first Grin

OP posts:
HipHopopotomus · 11/04/2011 17:58

yep Bob's are back. I've not had a hair cut for yonks & decided to treat myself to a shoulder length bob once my maternity leave starts next week. In the meantime, every celebrity in the West has gone and got one!

Nothing original in the world I'm afraid!! You colleague may well have decided to go for this cut a while back - but I can see why you are Shock

cantpooinpeace · 11/04/2011 18:14

I have same problem - a friend who copies some of the most obvious stuff.

It's not the copying it's the lack of acknowledgement prior to copying that makes it unbearable. If she'd had said - "I love your bob, totally gonna get myself one of those" then that's fine. The fact the my friend never acknowledges she likes something of mine then blatantly copies it is what makes my blood boil.

Also when I ask about it, it's she makes out like she never knew I already had one. It has happened all our lives and the latest is her newborn now has the same fave teddy as my four yr old - That I found a bit unnerving.

CristinaTheAstonishing · 11/04/2011 18:23

So this is where all the Joneses are. I'll subscribe to the thread and try and keep up :)

AgentZigZag - is your name after the book? It's a great read, isn't it?

WhatTheActualFcuk · 11/04/2011 18:30

I have no idea what you mean Grin

AgentZigzag · 11/04/2011 20:07

Grin at WhatTheActualFcuk

It is after the fantastic book/man christina, one of those books you can't stop thinking about afterwards.

oldraver · 11/04/2011 20:28

I had an ex who got his new girlfriend to 'copycat' me. We had an open relationship and we met her when I was with him and he tried to push us together, I soon got bored of him and him trying to manipulate my dress o we split up and he suddenly 'fell in love' with her

The next time I bumped into them she had the same piercings as me that he couldn't wait to get her to show off to me (couldn't miss one though as he got her to wear short skirts that showed off her bum cheeks and NO knickers) but incredulously she had the exact same very unusual type of clubbing shoes. She even had the same bags as me

A year or so later I saw her web porn site and she had the same nurses outfit I had and .... the very piercings I had told my boyfriend I had wanted for nearly 20 odd years, they were also very unusual