to think that dads who say I am babysitting the kids are strange.

[goodbyemrschips]

As above.

Dads are not babysitting their own kids, you baby sit other peoples kids surely?

I use the term "babysitting" when one of us is going out for the evening and the other stays at home - like if we get an invite someone I'll say I can come but DP will have to babysit.

If it's looking after ds in general though, neither of us babysit.

I don't use the exact term babysitting, but it means the same thing when I have DD for the day. It's more to suggest that DH is busy out somewhere more than anything.

I don't mind the 'you must miss him/her when you're at work' it's the 'he/she must miss you loads when you're at work' I find annoying. DH is a perfectably fine SAHD and you wouldn't be asking him that. I get lots of 'is your DH depressed staying at home' and 'he must be so bored' (because apparently it's really easy looking after a baby/toddler and he has nothing to do all day). They don't ask these questions after the SAHMs.

You say strange, I say tossers (being polite as it's. Sunday) . It's not babysitting it's called being a parent.

LOL, I remember my mil asking me who was going to look after ds when I was working weekends. My dh and I were like 'err his father????' , to add to it she asked him if he would be able to cope!!

(How I miss those days)

'You say strange, I say tossers (being polite as it's. Sunday) . It's not babysitting it's called being a parent.'

No need to be so rude. I agree in principle that looking after your own children is NOT babysitting, but it seems that I and many other people find it a handy term to use to describe the particular situation where one parent is out socialising and the other is looking after the child(ren) at home. People might even ask 'who's babysitting?' and if it wasn't a paid sitter or grandparent I'd just reply 'dh' and there would probably be a bit of a smile at the misapplication of the term but I certainly wouldn't expect either of us to be called a tosser!

I find the alternative a bit strange 'oh Mr BP can't come because he's at home parenting'.

Thanks for the replies.......

It's the same as when he says "I've hoovered for you" or "I've cleaned the bathroom for you".... For me? Errr, don't you live here too? Why is it for me?

I think it's a deep rooted thing, the way some men were brought up regarding families and childcare, housework, etc. Thankfully, times have changed in most households

YANBU

i hate this. i was out on saturday for a meal with friends, once of them asked "who has got the baby?" i replied "she's at home with her dad"

as another poster pointed out, it's like i have to book him if i want him to stay at home with her while i go out. a few days before i just say "i'm going out on thursday, can you make sure you're home for 6pm so you can see to the baby?" whereas he'll just say "i'm off out on saturday" with no thoughts to child care. i guess that's just how it is?

What if it's the mum babysitting then?

Guess it depends on your relationship - there's no expectation that the baby is more my responsibility than DP's, so we babysit equally

Happyinherts I hate that too - I cleaned the kitchen for you.. For me? I don't cook! You made it messy!

My dh does a lovely little when people say how 'good' he is with our ds or ask if he babysits him so I can go out. He finds it a tad insulting.

YANBU my DH says this when he looks after my DD without me being around and it drives me crazy.

breatheslowly, if I want my DH to remember anything, including looking after our DD, I have to send him an invitation in outlook so it goes in his diary (including our wedding and honeymoon dates). Otherwise he just doesnt ever put it in there and denies all knowledge. Years ago before I did this, he actually forgot we were going to Thailand for two weeks and we had to go a day late while he arranged leave cover.

I've heard mums say it about their own DHs looking after their kids too.

I also correct my daughters if they say "Mummy's iron" or "Daddy did Mummy's washing", but not if they say "Mummy's car", oddly enough .

I say it about myself and my DD - but I know lots of people think it's weird.